Please give me strenght

[quitinoxys]

I have been on travel ALL week and my back is in extreme pain. I went to the spa in the hotel and had a soak in the hot tub and got a massage. This is where I meet one of my clients and started to talk to him about my chronic back pain. He told me he has the same problem and he has been going to PM for years. I told him I had to do a seminar tomorrow and wish this pain would go away so I can get through it. I explained to him my bout with oxys and he said "I know but when you were taking them I bet your quality of life was probably better then it is now". I told him not really because I was liviing (or barely living) in a drug haze and thats why I stopped taking my pain meds. Keep in mind this is a man who I have emmense professional rs respect for. He told me he has resigned himself to the fact that he will haqve to live the rest of his life on pain meds and thats it. With that being said he handed 4 pills and told me that these won't screw you up like those oxys, and since I respect him I put them in my pocket and told him "If I really need them I might take them". I went back to my hotel room and did a google pill ID on them and found out that they are opana. I am now sitting hear starring at them as my back still hurts like h3!!. Since I am away from my support system I don't have anyone to help me not to give in to the pain. As all of you long time guys know I had a rough time kicking this crap, I dont want to take a step backwards. Today I am 130 days clean but my addict brain is saying one isn't going to hurt you, but I know thats BS. Siiting here typing is the only thing stopping from swallowing them. I thought this was all over but I guess addiction is rearing its ugly head again. So please GIVE me strenght---quitin

[FassFeat]

OMG, I went to bed after I answered the initial post.. so glad you were all there for quitnoxys. Thank God.

Congrats quitn, for beating your addiction last night. I too believe your wife is your true soulmate and the God stepped in and intervined for you last night. Alls well that ends well.  Andrew

[quitinoxys]

Thanks for helping me get through last night, it was rough. I did my presentation this morning and pretty much did on no sleep. I am know hitting the road to go home. I hope this never happens to mee again but it probably will. The next time I will refuse the poision so it doesn't sit there and tuant me. Again, I want to express my most sincere appreciation for pulling through this lapse in judgement. Thanks to all of you I DID NOT use. God Bless you all and now I am going to get some sleep I will check back latter.

[vicki595]

Oh Dear!!   I just started reading this now and was terrified for you!!!   We've all been there,believe me!   It's an enormous struggle. You had some major triggers: PAIN !
Being away from your support systems!  Being alone!

I love your wife! How serendipitous that she should call you...a miracle!

Listen to me:  Get some Motrin. Take 800mg 3x per day for the next few days. It DOES work!!   That Opana would have screwed you up!!

Check back when you can~

xo

[pharma9]

I really understand how you feel quitin...Sometimes when my joints and feet ache I think that maybe a couple narcs would not be so bad...but then right away i realize that the pain relief is temporary and it will come back even worse if I take something.I just stick to my otc pain meds and eventually everything subsides and I am not any worse off than before.
Good for you fighting the urge as well as you did and remember...the pain will always come back regardless of whatever you take..narc or otc's.
You are stll better off refusing the narcs because where will it all stop if you think you will only need a couple.You always need more than a couple...and the cycle starts again.

[dominosarah]

Hope you are feeling better today.        sara

[gizzy32]

So glad you made it through that, congrats buddy. How are you feeling today?