thoughts for my wife

[helplesshusband08]

im going to tell my wife i know about her lratab problem tonight, ive got all the therapy and doctor appt. lined up i hope she does it . ime also going to show her all of my posts here does any one have any helpful thoughts for her

[ihatemakinganickname]

Good luck to you. Be prepared for anger. Most likely she will be angry she is busted and make it some how feel like you did something wrong. Try not to get angry back. Do not be rude or hateful or blaming. Just stay calm and keep a clear head, because she will probably feel trapped. Let her know you love her and this is why you are doing it. Hope all goes well.

[abritt121222]

Agree 100% with Downey now that she agree to go tithe docs and all that and she knows u have talked to use tell her we said cmon it will do her alot of good I found more comfort talking to other ppl that were in my shoes or have been in my shoes than anywhere else but like he said give her some apace when she does talk and don't b nosey or anyhing when she isnon her cause just like an earlier post said we r very touchy about our dirty little secret and like Downey said when I was talkin I made sure Boone was reading what I was saying mainly because some things thy I said about thethings I have done would sound so horrible to u or someone else that is lucky enough to not have this awful disease of addiction
good luck tho bro and it sounds like everything is goin great so far

[Downey]

I think it will work and I'm sure you have suggested she read the posts on this site and it maybe something she may want to do in private. I'm speaking of how I would feel if someone were looking over my shoulder reading these posts. I work almost 100 percent with drug addicts recovering and in between and I'm always looking over my shoulder making sure no one is watching me.

Just to let your wife know that she is not alone and there is nothing to be ashamed of.

Good luck to both of you.
Downey

[helplesshusband08]

thanks every one i did it early i had a counsolor and a doctor lined up for today and she went she was upset and ashamed but now she has some suboxin maby that will help although she didnt cry until i took her last 4 tabs out of her pocket now she doesnt have extra money she is in the hole 200.00 to the dope man and has sub and support if this doesnt work i guess ill be even more lost

[Danny111]

I have to agree with the above posts.  Try to be as mellow and non-judgemental sounding as you can when you talk to her.  I'd have gotten very defensive if I had been confronted or exposed.  I'd have tried to deny and talk my way out of it I think.  On the other hand if you can get her to talk about it it could be a huge relief for her to have it out in the open with you and to be able to talk to you about it.  For many people a big reason they don't get help is that they won't be able to keep it secret if they do.

[dominosarah]

I agree with OIFMc09......compassion is a must.  We as addicts become very defensive when our dirty little secret is exposed.  She is very lucky to have you on her side.  Family support is such a big plus when going thru this.  I wish you all the best tonight and please let us know how it goes.  Hopefully she will join us on the forum.  This addiction makes us feel very alone and here she will find that she isnt alone at all......sara

[OIFMc09]

Good luck, but she doesn't know that you know?  Just be prepared for denial, resentment, and a general "how dare you"! attitude.  Hopefully she sees the light, but it is a touchy thing trying to convince someone else they've got a problem.  Tread lightly and try not to be combative.  Compassion should be your theme tonight.  Good luck you're doing the right thing!

[sweatinit]

My prayers are with youb oth tonight! The best thing I can tell her is that life IS better without pills! I am no longer a slave to them. You're awesome guy for standing by your wife!