Staying clean and aftercare

[Pat1956100]

There are a lot of newly recovering people on the forum and they have been doing great with detoxing and the early part of getting clean.  As we all know or will find out, that is the easy part.  The hard part is staying clean.  We feel that once we get through the withdrawals, we will never take another pill but for most of us it doesn't work that way.  The weak moments will come where we think that 1 or 2 pills won't hurt and we end up back where we started, having to go through withdrawals all over again and in a worse position than we were on our first attempt.
I haven't started aftercare yet as I have been going through hell trying to find non narcotic meds to help with my pain issues.  Side effects and withdrawals from other meds have pretty well kept me house bound.
I just know that the members who have been successful staying clean for any length of time have received aftercare.
I am hoping that they will chime in and stress the importance of it and how you can learn to be happy while staying clean.  I try to give advice on getting clean and feel like I haven't been doing a good job of advising how to stay clean.  I just don't want any of you to have to go through this again.  Been there done that too many times.

[atthebeach]

I am proud of you Pat. This is your time to shine.
Time to start living again.
You got this girl.
Keep the faith,
Keep on keeping on,
Much love,
Debbie

[Pat1956100]

Thanks Gnarly
I totally agree with you and don't believe I will be able to stay clean without going to a support group like N/A.  I have spoken with them on the phone but have been too sick from this damn infection to actually go.
No more excuses, I have to do it as soon as I can.
I have tried to do it on my own for way too long and it just doesn't work.
Thanks for bumping this post up.
I saw it in my email one day and thought it must be a sign and came back here because of it.

[gnarly_1]

Hey Pat im so glad to see you post  I for one could have ever done this alone N/A has opens up a whole new life to me .I know there are other types of aftercare I used a substance abuse counselor for 3 yrs but it wasent enough you need to change the very way you think this is a disease and needs to be treated like one... if you have high blood pressure you would take meds and not stop it kinda the same N/a gives you the building blocks to rebuild your liff the pills are just a symptom  of something much deeper your on the right track now be honest and open to suggestions thanks a million for this post...Gnarly

[clean_in_ks]

Right back atcha baby.......I'm off to slumberland now :)

[Pat1956100]

Have I told you lately that I love you?

[clean_in_ks]

Miss Pattie.....I just saw this.....an answered prayer of mine for sure!

I am so thankful you have someone in your life you can talk to now.....the healing has begun....thank you God for putting this woman in Pat's life~

[Pat1956100]

Thanks Debbie
I so wish I had found this lady sooner.  Yes please keep trying to find someone to talk to.  It's taken me 7 years to find her and she is so amazing.  I don't even have to tell her some things.  She tells me and my mouth drops open because she knows what I'm thinking.
I started taking pills for my grief so if I don't get the grief part straightened out, I'll keep relapsing.
I think I can live with the physical pain.  It's the emotional pain that's been so hard.
I think of all of you too and now that I can see a light at the end of the tunnel, I feel "worthy" enough to come back, lol.
Hugs to all.

[atthebeach]

Good morning pat. Good for you honey. Talking through things is important.
I need to do that too. I have some unresolved stuff.
Hope you get your tooth taken care of and get to the bottom of the pain.
Oh boy I can relate to the fibro stuff. Living with pain on a daily nails is no fun.
I think Of you often Hun and am praying for you,
Hugs,
Debbie

[Pat1956100]

I started counselling with a wonderful lady.  She sure seems to understand me.  I decided to be totally honest about everything.  I didn't realize how much grief I still had inside.

I'm also going to a specialist in 9 days to get to the bottom of this abscessed tooth which I already had a root canal on but is still infected.

I'm still trying to get used to living with fibromyalgia but that will come.  
I'm making progress.

I will try and be around more.  I'm back on antibiotics so hoping I have more energy soon.

I miss you all.
Hugs

[clean_in_ks]

Hi there, Miss Pattie :):)

Until I became willing to learn new ways of thinking....I could not learn new ways of living~

[IBKleen]

I hope so Pat....

[takingmylifeback2014]

Hi Pat ... Yes some type of aftercare aftercare lol
Miss you around here :-)

[Pat1956100]

This came up in my email so I think it's a sign for me.  Aftercare, Aftercare, Aftercare.

[gnarly_1]

bump

[VICourageous]

THIS POST WAS MADE ON FEB 6 2013

.......................................................................................................................................................................................................................
This was 15 months ago for me and I think it is a good one to bump back..
Due to some of the ones that are still struggling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bless

[Pat1956100]

I'm blushing cuz you called me Pet, lol.
Seriously, I am hoping it helps others too.  I hope they aren't like me and have to go through the insanity several times before they finally get it.

[VICourageous]

I just wanted to comment again about the aftercare. I too go to AA/NA I have been going for 6 months and WOW last night I had tears in my eyes because what we were disscussing HIT me hard. Yes we get to feeling better and think it is OK But the meetings and a sponsor is a life long jorney to stay that way. We have the disease of addiction and anything or anyone can trigger us if we do not keep our GOD and SUPPORT. I do pray that others will get in here and read this GREAT ADVISE from ALL
Pet I am new on here but what a great subject. I HOPE IT HELPS OTHERS.
vvic

[Pat1956100]

Thanks for sharing and it's nice to hear what works for everyone.  Staying clean isn't a one size fits all.  We are all different and there are many different types of aftercare that work.

[Dryan8313]

For the past 8 years on methadone, I've tricked myself into believing that mentally, I'm just fine. All I gotta do is get through the detox (which I just started this week with tapering my dose); and then I'll be just fine. Yesterday, I found myself saying in the back of my head that ive taken low doses for the last couple of days, so if I take just a little extra tomorrow, it will feel so good and ill get so much done around the house, etc. WOW, was that a wake up call to me realizing that I still have that addict thinking! Methadone didn't take away my urge to use all these years. I didn't have the "urge" because I WAS still using everyday!
With that said... I definitely need more support than I originally thought I'd need. Whether its meetings or a private therapist... I need people to help push me in the right direction when I'm having a bad day or when I'm doubting my own strength. The fact that i actually considered upping my dose ALREADY, after only 3 days, is a huge wake up call for me. I'm not even dealing with any w/d symptoms yet so I really, truly had NO reason to even consider going back up in my dose. It's 100% due to the "want" that I still crave for my drugs. Ugh... Totally *****. How naive of me to think that if I can just detox successfully, that id be just fine. I'm just glad that I realized this now, rather than after going through all that pain, just to relapse from not getting the support I'm gonna really need.
So I'm glad to say that I stuck to my plan... I did NOT take more like I thought about doing last night. I woke up and posted a little on here and read a ton of positive posts from people that both have clean time, and also from people who are working their butts off to get clean. After that, I didn't even consider taking more than my planned dose.
One day at a time right?
I think aftercare is EXTREMELY important too and I will definitely need it if I plan to stay clean! First things first... Gotta get this poison outa my body!

[Pat1956100]

lol, I know.  Flushing is very permanent.  I have never been able to flush them.  I gave some away but couldn't flush.  They were way too expensive.

[Pat1956100]

Awww thanks weaver.  That means a lot coming from you.  You Rock!!!!

[weaver71]

Aftercare has made the difference this time. I'm pretty stubborn and had to try it on my own for a few years. Not only does aftercare help us stay clean and cope in new ways, it has become a joy. I am no longer ashamed or afraid the people in my little town will talk, but am proud to be a part of such an amazing group of recovering people. The local churches don't give back as much as the people in my meetings. Aftercare has made me grateful to be an addict in recovery, I would have never been the person I am becoming had I never been hooked on drugs and forced to reach out to the most awesome people here and in my local community. It was something of a chore at first, now I feel really lucky that drugs lead me to real community and self-exploration and growth.

And Pat, never question your advice or opinion, you are one of those truly empathetic addicts that helps ten fold. Never stop believing in yourself. YOU ARE AWESOME!!!

[conhall]

haha I always Look back at old post of mine pat and Boy was I ever ready to kill someone but I didnt and yes you told me go for a walk I was so mad walking I think I even scarred the dogs that chase people and bark they didnt even dare I Just gave them that look like Make my day! LOL hehehe On the serious side thank you Pat as always you have a place in my heart because you helped me even when you yourself was struggling you always took the time to check on me and talk me off the ledge. You were right though I could get thru it and also you are  right I welcomed all the help I could get. I was so scarred and unsure. When I flushed the pills I wanted to call a plumber afterwards LOL! hehehe

[kyle505]

You're right. As always. And so good to see you sharing again.