Survived first night...

[Dixiechick72]

Well I am 24 hours clean and starting my second day... So far the worst was waking up at 2am and not being able to go back to sleep... A little restless but I'm happy. I really am happy I'm taking this step. It's amazing how the mind works... Normally if I was going without I thought I was dying. I couldn't move eat etc... Now that this is MY decision to stop I feel real happy about it. Having all this support really really helps

[lulu747]

Hey Dixie!

I wanted to check on you and see how the day went- you must be at close to 36 hours by now WHOO HOO!  Your fabulous attitude and love for yourself is an inspiration, you ARE DOING THIS!  Awesome work.  Remember, you can't change the past, or control the future, all you have is this moment now.  Stay present, and keep moving forward with all that love in your heart.  Patience and time, darlin', you will get yourself back, and SO much more.

Lu

[Dixiechick72]

@minn and bryan thank u guys. I'm really focused on making this a good experience so I can get through this. I've felt sick before so I jumped back on. But now I'm doing what everyone is telling me... I think the gateraide and imodium have helped a lot!!!  Before I didn't get out of bed. I started to do that this morning but changed my mind and got up. I can kind of feel the restlessness building in my body so I went swimming with my boys. I'm staying active talking to people as well. Idk why but I think I'm dreading tomorrow and I need to not worry about it.  Just focus on today.. But I'm trying to hurry and get past all this crap. I want my mind and body back. :) I know I'll get it soon.

[Fireby29]

Good job Dixie!  When your through the wd's soon, then the healing of that brain starts.  Your right to focus on eating right and getting back in the gym!  It will help a ton, I promise.  You have a great attitude for day 2, that is so fantastic.  Be proud and keep it up!

Bryan

[minn66]

Oh my goodness, I have cried more in the past few months than I had in years! I used to pride myself on the fact that I never cried, but now, once I am done, I feel cleansed. In the beginning I cried over the least thing. It is normal to have emotions, I had just forgotten and had suppressed them for so long.

You go, Dixie! Day 3 awaits and you'll push through that and before you know it, you'll be at a week!

[Dixiechick72]

Thank u lesa and minn I appreciate it.  My day is going by. I'm finding my moods are coming and going in waves but I'm still staying positive for day 2 will be done then on to day 3. I'm spending time with my boys. I'm slowly telling everyone in my family and it's amazing at the support I'm getting from everyone. So thanks again. And lesa I think I did lose a lot of my emotions. I'll take that back anyday

[10356]

it is wonderful to feel again :) I cried and cried when I first got clean I cried over everything !! not only do the opiates rob us of our lives it even takes our emotions Then when we stop they come flooding out as if we broke a dam on a swollen river !! they do settle down although I think I'm a lil more sensitive now This is ok it is better then being barren inside. I'm glad you know
where the problem lies and so Grateful for your Brother !! a Big Congrats out to him !! This will bring you both closer.. how wonderful you have his support for only another addict really gets it. You got this :)

[minn66]

It's great that you have your husband's support. I was so scared to tell mine but relieved when I finally did. This forum has been a Godsend for me, too!

[Dixiechick72]

@ minn... Hello and thank u. Yes each minute does add up to the hours. I love the support but also the knowledge I'm gaining in all this. My husband kept asking me how I found out about all this stuff. The forum and stuff to get. Then of course started to ask about my problem. He knows I was always taking pills but didn't know how much. I'll tell him when I'm ready to tell him but he's being supportive and I love him dearly for that!!

[Dixiechick72]

Lesa. U always make me cry happy tears. U nailed that one... So so true of what u said. I always thought it helped me and now I see how it made me really lazy and very sick.  But not anymore. I'm done and thank u for pulling for me. Believe it or not my brother was a full on drug addict and recovered with na and he preaches that stuff like crazy. So of course he's one I talked to as well. I have his support. I know where the problem lies... But my way of facing it was to not feel it. I've come a long way with a lot of things in my life so this will be another one to add to my book!!!;)

[minn66]

You're doing great and love your attitude, Dixie! I'm at work so can't post much. I'm on lunch now. I believe you will conquer those devil pills and show 'em who's boss! Those darned things fool you at first, then sink their claws in you and even though you feel like crap when you take them, they make your body rebel bigtime when you don't. I got to where I didn't want to go do anything. Still a bit of a recluse, not nearly as social as I was before the pills, but am better than I was a few months ago. I guess some things still take time.

Keep up the excellent work. Each minute adds up to an hour, then days, then weeks and months. Build on each success!

Hugs,

Minn

[10356]

You really do make me smile :) I was looking forward to getting on the forum today Just to see how you were !! :)) we let so much go behind our drugs.. we are like Hey they give us energy they make us better moms better people.. that is the lie addiction is.. the whole time we are speeding around on the pills we are being robbed of the taste of food the smell we do not watch movies we do not just sit with our family we are too busy being supermom Then the addiction turns on us.. we become lazy sad sick.. we fail to see color life we do not notice the small things like birds singing the breeze a Beautiful day Our active addiction is a thief and it robs us of our lives.. then in the end when we have been loyal it will kill us.. so You know my Joy when I see a sister a mom and grand mother find her way back is a feeling I can not describe It is like You snatched your soul away from the devil.. You are going to be just fine Dixiechick.. Now that you can face your addiction you may want to add some outside support like aa na a counselor.. getting to the root cause of our addiction Frees us even more it frees us from the burden of our past.. I'm pulling for you and in awe of your commitment !! so Proud for you !!

[Dixiechick72]

@ nowornever... Thank u!!! Good job on your recovery as well!! We can do this!!!  I think really my biggest issue was my stomach. But I'm taking care of that and trying to stay focused on the positive from this. The support is great. Now I feel stronger because I feel like not only do I need to prove I can do this to myself but to everyone now. I feel like if I failed ( which I won't) id be letting everyone else down too.. So that is keeping me strong...

[Dixiechick72]

@lesa... I was waiting for u!!! Your post always get me pumped up and smiling!!! I did it!!! Yes!! Woo hoo... I feel good too. Yeah I get the hot and cold flashes but I'm staying hydrated and eating which is where I always failed before. I didn't realize it was coming off the pills that was making me feel sick. But now I know and I'm done!!! We have a pic posted of me and my girls on the wall and I was looking at that pic all weekend saying to myself.. I want to be like that again.. Normal... I really though the high from the pills would carry me through the day but in reality it was really dragging me down. I can see that. I use to be so active. I was a gym junkie!! I worked out 7 days a week!! Now I've let myself go a little more then I'd like and that's when it all hit me. I'm taking back my life. I'm going to join the gym again and get back into taking care of my body instead of making it sick. I really did make myself sick!! But I'm past it now and I'm on my way to a better me!!! So thanks everyone for keeping me so pumped up!!!

[NowOrNever43]

DixieChick, congrats on your 24 hours! I am right behind you! I have another 4 1/2 to go until I hit 24. I actually worked today and have been putting on a pretty good act! I dont think anyone has noticed yet, except for my frequent getting up n walking around because I get restless! You are doing great keep up the good work and keep the positive attitude!!!

[10356]

Good morning Dixiechick :) You make me smile !! Your attitude is Wonderful !! Congrats on day 1 Whoo Hooo another Sister is finding Freedom.. I'm so Proud of you for flushing !! You were not kidding when you said you were ready !! Watch out World Dixiechick is here !! You are doing everything you need to too get thru this wd so Happy for you.. Your family must be thrilled with the New you :) so so Happy for you.. Keep up that Great attitude and knock this addiction out of the ballpark :) hugs lesa

[Dixiechick72]

@ rizboy... Way too much norco. That's what I'm coming off of...@ sonrissa thank u and no that was not goofy. In fact I use to always say that to people!!! So thank u. I love the support. That's what's keeping me strong. So today I'm spending time with my boys. Can't wait for some time in the sun...

[Sonrissa]

Hi Dixie! Well, one day down, and one day closer to a clean and happy life! Stay strong and work hard! It will get tougher, and that's when you will need to dig deep! You sound strong and well prepared! Not to use a baseball analogy, but I love baseball! When life throws you a curve ball, swing for the fences, you might just hit a home run! Oh that sounds kinds goofy, but hopefully you get what I'm trying to say! Take good care! Sending strength to you!!

[rizboy]

Hahaha!! its funny what apathy does isnt it?What you coming off?? its 10% physical and 90% mental i found. Music music music for me.
Really happy for you!!

[Dixiechick72]

I hope it's easy but I'm not expecting it to be. I haven't really said how much I was abusing norco yet... So I'm not sure how this road will be. I do know I've taken up to 120 norco in 3 days!! 3!!! So to be on none now I'm pretty damn proud of myself. I actually made myself so sick I ended up in the ER. I gave myself gastroparesis from taking so much... It stopped me for a few weeks but I started abusing the tramadol they gave me and ended up on the norco again. But I stopped CT. And I'm determined to get my life back. I'll be 40 this year so I would love to say my 40's were my best years yet!!!

[Dixiechick72]

Well hello rizboy... Thanks for the comment!!! I'm using all that stuff and really staying hydrated. Forcing myself to eat. Before I usually tell myself I'm dying and lay in bed for two days and end up in the ER with more pills to take home... But I'm happy. I've actually have told family and friends and having the support is great!!!! So thank u thank u!!  I'm ready to be off this crap!!! Im kicking it hard core!!!!;) thanks

[Pat1956100]

I am so happy for you.  Keep it up, no matter what.  I hope the rest of this is easy for you.

[rizboy]

Nice one. stay positive kick the f**k out of this ishh. i used plenty of music ,baths and valerian root to chill me and keep me positive.
:)

[Dixiechick72]

Well even if I don't get comments I'm still proud of myself!!!;)