Third time is a charm

[MFS79]

I am going to bed tonight ad waking up in the morning and not taking any pills but for my diabetes and blood pressure. This is my third time going CT. I am hoping the third time is a charm. My goal is to be clean by the 26 of December, and I don't want to start the new year on pills. It will be awesome to wake up Christmas morning and not take a pill to watch my kids open gifts. Wish me luck.

[MFS79]

Day 3 and I feel great. Better than I thought I would. I didn't think I could make it this far. The RLS didn't start till about 330 am so I got about 5 hours sleep. But I still feel pretty darm good. My da is bringing the big dog home from the vet soon which is good because te other dog that didn't get out is walking around the house whinning. At least he gets one of his pals back. Maybe for Christmas we can get the kids another lil dog for the one they lost. Thank you for all of you encouragement it means a lot. Day 4 is tomarrow and more days after that. I am so happy.

[MFS79]

Thank you all for ur posts it means a lot. I crossedy mined that this is a test. I did not take any thing. My dad took the big dog to the vet becuz he was still alive. He has no broken bones or internal injury. He has a little bit if blood in his lungs. He is staying over night for obseeevation and we should be able to bring him he tomarrow. What makes it hardest is my kids. But I have to stay strong for them. 2 days down. I can do this.

[LeaAnn807]

I am so sorry about your dogs!  That's a hateful thing to do and is just heartbreaking any time.  I can't imagine knowingly taking a pet's life and not telling anyone that I was sorry.  Just couldn't do it!  

I know it doesn't feel like it now, but using wouldn't make you feel a bit better.  And if you do, you'll have sadness over your dog plus guilt for using when you're like halfway through this or even a little more.  Losing your dogs is a tragedy for you, but you don't wanna let another one happen on top of it.  So, do your best to stay focused on what you're doing here.  I know that is much easier for me to say than for you to actually do.  I don't mean to sound cold at all.  I just want you to get clean and have this behind you.  By the weekend, you will feel much better and maybe you can do something nice in memory of your dogs.  (I don't have pets, but I have my entire life, and I sure do feel bad for you!)

Hang in there!  You can still do this!

[evolv]

i think a lot of us are here because we turned to (more) pills to escape feeling things... i was in the middle of a taper last year and my fiance broke up with me (on my birthday), and 3 close friends passed away all in one month - all of a sudden my "taper" turned into twice my normal dosage. every time i get close to coming off the pills, the memories and feelings come rolling back. there isn't any escaping it - only postponing. and since you are clean now, don't go back there, it's not worth it. you will only put off the inevitable. it's NOT worth it. it's terrible but you need to feel those feelings and the more you do, the better you will become at coping and moving forward without the numbing effect of the pills. hang on. you can do it.

[YesLife4Me]

First of all, I am so sorry that someone would just leave your pups like that.  That is just horrible!   Secondly, I can't help but wonder how many of us are put to the test so close to wd with situations that would normally drive us to take a couple pills to escape our feelings.   Whatever you do, don't take anything...you will restart the process and in the end it doesn't solve your problems.    Part of getting clean is facing life without drugs...good and bad.   Using just isn't an option.   It's like pouring poison down our throats.   And I am really truly sorry to hear about your pups.  

[Teresa1717]

OMG I am SOOO sorry!!! What a horrible and tragic thing to happen to your pups! :( I know how hard it is to lose your "best friend", I lost both of mine this year. Just stay strong and dont use this as an excuse to use! As others have told me in recent days, using is not an option! And truer words havent been spoken!

Again, Im so sorry for your puppies...