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Please help! Weaning off oxycodone
I am not really sure what to ask or what I am really looking for except some guidance and support. I am afraid to ask help elsewhere for a multitude of reasons. To make a long story short, I am addicted to oxycodone. This is terrible and not really even sure how things got to the point to where they are today. I used to be a first grade teacher and a now a stay at home mom to a 1 year old and almost 4 year old. I want off these stupid life controlling pills. I was taking probably 18 30mg pills a day (I didn't count for a long time....would just pop them like candy. Very stupid). I have decided to wean down and in the past week or so am taking about 12-13 a day. So I have weaned down about 6 30mg. I feel so terrible about myself. This is no way to live! I guess what I am looking for is support....does anyone know of a good taper plan? Any help is so much appreciated.
Hello and welcome.
It sounds like you are going in the right direction. We aren't allowed to give taper plans on this forum because we don't know your medical history and everyone is different but there are several members who have tapered successfully. I am hoping one of them sees your post soon and can help you through private messages. Hang in there.
It sounds like you are going in the right direction. We aren't allowed to give taper plans on this forum because we don't know your medical history and everyone is different but there are several members who have tapered successfully. I am hoping one of them sees your post soon and can help you through private messages. Hang in there.
Thank you for reaching out to me....I appreciate it. It feels good to not feel so alone! I guess if I keep on weaning, I could do it. I just want to wean fast but I have found that difficult to do. It is very difficult but I am very motivated. I just need to be able to function somewhat because of my children which are the most important thing in my life.
If you are able to wean, then do it. Cutting down a little at a time is much easier on your body, but will draw out the mental side of detox. As you get to the point where you have less and less pills, it may be a good idea to have someone hold your meds for you, helping to make sure that you stick to the plan. I couldn't wean; I tried, but knowing that there were pills waiting for me down the hall...
A couple of things - keep yourself nourished. Eat lots of healthy food, drink lots of water. If/when you get to the point where you don't feel like eating, try Ensure. If you're going to the bathroom a lot, find a drink with electrolytes added.
And now is the time to start being truthful with yourself. You should try to cut all sources; if you can't access pills easily, then it will be harder to relapse. You need to get out from behind your secret. This is one of the most difficult things I did, but it is very important if you want to stay clean. You need to tell friends and loved ones about your "problem" with pills. If you keep the secret, you will most likely relapse behind it.
And you need to look in to after care. NA, something.
All the best. Good luck....Hundreds of us have been through what you are just starting, and we are enjoying life clean. There is a lot of life after pills - that's a promise.
A couple of things - keep yourself nourished. Eat lots of healthy food, drink lots of water. If/when you get to the point where you don't feel like eating, try Ensure. If you're going to the bathroom a lot, find a drink with electrolytes added.
And now is the time to start being truthful with yourself. You should try to cut all sources; if you can't access pills easily, then it will be harder to relapse. You need to get out from behind your secret. This is one of the most difficult things I did, but it is very important if you want to stay clean. You need to tell friends and loved ones about your "problem" with pills. If you keep the secret, you will most likely relapse behind it.
And you need to look in to after care. NA, something.
All the best. Good luck....Hundreds of us have been through what you are just starting, and we are enjoying life clean. There is a lot of life after pills - that's a promise.
THANK YOU for your kind words. You are right, it is time to be truthful. Just typing out this question, on this forum, kind of shocked me. I have been lying to myself. I am excited to be free of these. They are so powerful....I really got in way over my head and fast. I know that life will be so much better when I am free of these. I am just so scared of the process of getting off of them. Terrified is more accurate. Each evening, I am washed over with feelings of depression and hate for what I am doing to myself. It makes me sick that I got involved with these "life ruiners" in the first place, especially with 2 young kids. What a mess! Does anyone have any tips for getting over the depression? Also, if I am having feelings of withdrawl as I am weaning does that mean I am making progress? If I increase the duration of time before taking my next dose is that also benefitting me?
We are all different; any time you cut back on the number of pills you're taking, and you increase the time between pills, then you are making progress. As far as the depression goes - first question...Did you have an issue with depression prior to using? If so, call your doc; if not, then depression, anxiety - all a part of withdrawal.
Finally, I promise you that thinking and worrying and being terrified of detox is much, much worse than the actual process itself. For about two weeks prior to my cold turkey detox I would sit in bed, every single night, and be filled with dread; I couldn't sleep, had the shakes, etc. Two weeks...Then I started detox and, yes, it wasn't fun, but my mind had painted a much darker picture. I think that happens because the mind doesn't want the meds to stop flowing. That is just the beginning of the mental battle. We'll get in to that aspect of detox later.
Finally, I promise you that thinking and worrying and being terrified of detox is much, much worse than the actual process itself. For about two weeks prior to my cold turkey detox I would sit in bed, every single night, and be filled with dread; I couldn't sleep, had the shakes, etc. Two weeks...Then I started detox and, yes, it wasn't fun, but my mind had painted a much darker picture. I think that happens because the mind doesn't want the meds to stop flowing. That is just the beginning of the mental battle. We'll get in to that aspect of detox later.
One of the biggest ways to help with your depression may be to stop beating yourself up. You didn't choose to become an addict. None of us did. It happened. It doesn't mean we are bad people.
The fact that you want to quit is a big step that a lot of people don't take.
Love yourself. You sound like a wonderful person.
The idea of tapering is so that you are not in withdrawal. Try cutting back and sticking with the same amount for a few days or so and then reduce it some more. Don't feel that you have to suffer.
I was terrified when I first found this forum too. The hardest part of this is the fear.
Keep posting and ask as many questions as you want. We are here for you.
Big hugs
Pat
The fact that you want to quit is a big step that a lot of people don't take.
Love yourself. You sound like a wonderful person.
The idea of tapering is so that you are not in withdrawal. Try cutting back and sticking with the same amount for a few days or so and then reduce it some more. Don't feel that you have to suffer.
I was terrified when I first found this forum too. The hardest part of this is the fear.
Keep posting and ask as many questions as you want. We are here for you.
Big hugs
Pat
I sent a message to a member who is great with tapering advice. I am sure you will be hearing from her soon.
I wish you knew how much I appreciate your words....I have felt so ashamed, alone and worn out through the 8 month or so duration of this. I should have come here long ago. My feelings surrounding this are all over the map. Sometimes I feel like I can get through this and everything will be okay. Other times, I become so frightened that I begin to shake. I just want off of these so I can move on with my life. The irony of this whole thing is that my husband was the person who had the problem with the pills in the first place. I have a horrible back, went to the doctor, was prescribed Vicodin (way too much) and down the spiral I went. I found one of his pills and further down I went. I started taking more and more...I think it masked my feelings of being overwhelmed and taking care of things for our family for so long. He is clean now and doing very well. If anyone found out what was going on with me, I think they would be shocked. Anyway, you have no idea (or maybe you do!) how much your kind words mean to me right ow!
Hi there-
You've done great getting down to less than half your daily dose! I know you want this over quickly but only a very slow taper will work. If you go slow and drop a very small amount at a time,your withdrawals will be much more tolerable.
I think you can do this because you're so motivated. You also have responsibilities at home so you don't want to be sick for a week! Would your doctor help you with tapering? Do you have access to enough pills to do a proper taper?
The depression is something that needs to be dealt with,too. Sometimes, beefing up on good food,vitamins and minerals and amino acids will help. You should also add some st.johns wort or same-e daily. Read label directions.
Tapering works for so many people. When you think about it, dropping one pill right know from your daily dose wouldn't even be noticeable right? Let me know what you think and I'll keep in touch.
You've done great getting down to less than half your daily dose! I know you want this over quickly but only a very slow taper will work. If you go slow and drop a very small amount at a time,your withdrawals will be much more tolerable.
I think you can do this because you're so motivated. You also have responsibilities at home so you don't want to be sick for a week! Would your doctor help you with tapering? Do you have access to enough pills to do a proper taper?
The depression is something that needs to be dealt with,too. Sometimes, beefing up on good food,vitamins and minerals and amino acids will help. You should also add some st.johns wort or same-e daily. Read label directions.
Tapering works for so many people. When you think about it, dropping one pill right know from your daily dose wouldn't even be noticeable right? Let me know what you think and I'll keep in touch.
This is encouraging....thank you! I do have underlying anxiety issues and am currently taking an anti-depressant which has been a tremendous help. I have never really been depressed. I have so much guilt about this. Knowing that it is going to end helps but the road to get from here to there is scary.
Thank you!!!! I have been taking a multi vitamin and have heard good things about l-tyrosine (hope that is spelled correctly). I think I will try the st johns...we have some at home. I do have access to do a proper taper. I am worried about not being successful but I have the mind set that this is life or death....which it ultimately is. I also can't deal with the lies and sneaking around. I feel like a different person. I'm wondering if I were to cut one out daily if that would work. I have cut down a lot but it has not been comfortable at times. Thanks for your advice. :)
When you take AD's, you shouldn't take Sam-E or any of the type. Also, have you thought about AA or NA...some kind of support therapy. Do you know WHY you take the pills?
Keep your chin up now. Things will improve. As your dose becomes less and less, you'll see your progress. It's also important to take your pills at the same time every day. Just stick with it and it takes discipline. Think about sharing this with your husband, you do need his help and support!
Keep your chin up now. Things will improve. As your dose becomes less and less, you'll see your progress. It's also important to take your pills at the same time every day. Just stick with it and it takes discipline. Think about sharing this with your husband, you do need his help and support!
Vicki has given you great advice. Stick with her and you will be able to do this. I know we want it right away but for it to work you have to be patient. I understand your feelings for sure. I hated myself and what I had done to my life. I have learned from this forum that we really have to forgive ourselves and keep trying. Everyone on this forum has been in your shoes. You don't have to lie here. We have heard it all and most of us have probably done it all. There are very wise people here who can help you through it.
If you have enough pills to taper, I think that is the way to go for you.
Good luck and keep posting. Feel free to pm any of us if you need to.
If you have enough pills to taper, I think that is the way to go for you.
Good luck and keep posting. Feel free to pm any of us if you need to.
We were writing at the same time...
Yes, you can cut out one but not every day, more like every week. That's what I mean by s l o w. and you can see, when you do it that way, you don't really feel it. I think you dropped a lot more than that as you were tapering before. It's just decreasing small amounts ove a long period of time. When I tapered it took me about 9 months. Maybe a little more. But, I barely felt it. It was the mental withdrawal that I had to deal with and that's where some supportive therapy came in.
Yes, you can cut out one but not every day, more like every week. That's what I mean by s l o w. and you can see, when you do it that way, you don't really feel it. I think you dropped a lot more than that as you were tapering before. It's just decreasing small amounts ove a long period of time. When I tapered it took me about 9 months. Maybe a little more. But, I barely felt it. It was the mental withdrawal that I had to deal with and that's where some supportive therapy came in.
I would like to try and get down quickly....I know it won't be comfortable but I think I will feel better about myself. I have access to them, but it is costly. I hate the whole process of getting them. Everything about pills is so horrible! I hink I know why I take them...actually as I have weaned down some of this has become more clear. For me, it combats me feeling tired....I feel like I have more energy. It takes away my back pain. I don't feel bored....and it masks stress.
I haven't really been taking them at a set time. I have counted them out and put them in individual bags so I don't lose count. Should I start to take them at regular intervals? I have been trying to hold off on taking Thomas long as I can, then giving in. Also, I chew them up before swallowing them. I probably should just swallow them like a normal person??? It is difficult to admit to all of this! I am so ashamed!!!
Listen, don't feel bad about this. There's NOTHING we haven't heard before!
And we've all been a little naughty...LOL
I would start swallowing them. If you want to go faster that's entirely up to you as long as you're prepared for the symptoms. In that way, it does drag out the discomfort. And yes, you should take them on a schedule but you don't have to. However. if you take a certain amount on one day, stay at that amount and don't go back up the next day.
And we've all been a little naughty...LOL
I would start swallowing them. If you want to go faster that's entirely up to you as long as you're prepared for the symptoms. In that way, it does drag out the discomfort. And yes, you should take them on a schedule but you don't have to. However. if you take a certain amount on one day, stay at that amount and don't go back up the next day.
I'm going to try and do what you say, starting tomorrow and see how that goes. I do feel awful about all of this. I hope to feel better about myself the further I go down. I didn't do as well weaning today. Hope that doesn't mess my progress up too much. You play you PAY!
If you are going to do it, do it right. Take Vicki's advice please. If you try and go too fast you will end up caving in and that will upset you more. You have a good plan and you are fortunate to have enough pills to do a sensible taper.
Please don't think that you have to suffer to get this done. If you reduce too much you will go into withdrawals and then end up getting all messed up emotionally and physically.
You don't deserve that.
Please don't think that you have to suffer to get this done. If you reduce too much you will go into withdrawals and then end up getting all messed up emotionally and physically.
You don't deserve that.
I agree with pat Please take Vickis advice. She has really given you good solid stuff here. I hope you do well and Keep posting you will get the support you need
Eveyone's right - you didn't get in this situation in a week and you won't get out in a week either. Plan the right taper - meaning follow vicki's advice.
Good luck to you and congrats for making this decision!
Good luck to you and congrats for making this decision!
As long as you keep going in the right direction, you're doing a hell of a good job. I agree you have all of the motivation that you need, Best wishes. Keep up the good work. Do you have an NA or AA Big Book? I'm sure it would help and prepare you for aftercare.
I would really like to take the 9 months, but there is no way I could afford to do that....unless I was really weaned down far enough by then. I understand the reasons for taking that long. It makes sense. I do feel like I deserve to suffer as I got myself into this horrible mess!!!! So hopeful I can wean down....so scary.
You don't deserve to suffer. You didn't plan on getting addicted. Stop telling yourself that. Congratulate yourself on your decision to quit.
If you deserve to suffer then all of us do and you don't think that we should suffer, do you? I don't think so.
It happens to a lot of people. People from all walks of life. The pills lie to us and tell us that they make us feel better, give us more energy, let us take better care of our homes and children. Then they turn on us.
If you deserve to suffer then all of us do and you don't think that we should suffer, do you? I don't think so.
It happens to a lot of people. People from all walks of life. The pills lie to us and tell us that they make us feel better, give us more energy, let us take better care of our homes and children. Then they turn on us.
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