bk on track

[natalile]

Hey guys, i don't no if u have seen my tracker logs but 09 has been horrible, my mum died, the dog got poisioned & almost died, i had 2 go see me mum on her death bed b 4 she passed 2 days later, So yep i messed up big time.
Yesterday i'd had enough i didn't use smack atall. I'm doin my best guys & thats all i can do as long as i dont give up then i have hope ye ?????.
Just a quick drop in 2 let u all no what i'm up 2. Is just a young girl still about ????

[dominosarah]

I am so sorry to hear about your mom passing.......that is always so hard.

Nat......keep fighting with everything you have.....You never give up and that is what is important.  Nice to see you posting.......we are always here for you         sara

[10356]

Hi Nat
I'm so sorry to read of the loss of your Mom.. I know how difficult that is.. Also sorry about the loss of your dog in such a cruel and thoughtless manner.. Indeed 09 has not started well for you but you have it within in you to change it.. You have not given up and that counts for a lot :) I agree with gizzy as you know.. If you ever need to talk please feel free to pm me.. lesa

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

Its been great to see you posting some more here lately.....wish you had some happier news - but all of us have different types and amounts of pure grief to deal with as we make our way through life. You are one strong lady, though.....and you will continue to battle those demons until you win......I am almost 60 - certainly didnt it right the first time or two I tried!!!!  All of my love, luck. and sympathy is extended to you. Just keep fighting. Thats ultimately any of us can do.......

[GoingToMakeIt]

Natalie, I am so sorry. That is a lot to try to deal with. You are indeed a trooper. No matter what, you keep on going. I am proud of you. You will get there, I have no doubts.

[worried878]

I am so sorry...losses like that are hard...glad u r still trying with all of this going on..my prayers r with u

[cathy5841]

nat, i am so sorry about your mom.  thats so hard when you are not an addict and intensifies when you are.  glad youare trying again.  as gizzy said you have tohave help so find some meetings and get active in recovery.  you can do this.

[lostdreams]

Hey Nat,
Nice to 'see' ya back on here! I was wondering how you were getting on.
I am so sorry babe about your mum, i understand it must be hard. My heart goes out to you and your family.
Now...hun, i know its hard getting off smack but ya gotta do this. Come on girl.....where's that strength in ya?!?! You CAN do this, i have faith in ya hunni.
PM me is ya want too. You know where i am. ~Massive Hugs to ya babe~

[starfish1963]

Sorry for your loss :(
People bite when it comes to harming animals grrrrrrrrr!  they will get theirs in the long run.
WTG for not using!!!  I don't know about smack (coke? crack?) but whatever it is you can do it!!!  One day at a time :)  Keep posting and get the support you need.  I'm proud of you and I honestly beleive many here are too so keep up the good work and Godspeed <3<3

[gizzy32]

Im so sorry about your mom Nat. I just looked at your tracker and am glad you are trying again.  We have never spoken, but i have seen you post on here throughout the year i have been on MH and you have not been able to stay clean.  I believe smack is probably the toughest drug to quit and in order to do so and STAY clean you NEED help. Doing your best would be going to meetings, rehab or sticking to support like glue. Your right, there is hope as long as you don't give up, but getting clean takes WORK and SERIOUS commitment. What are you doing for your recovery? End this viscious cycle hun. This was not meant to be a downer post, but your not beating this on your own Nat, you need to make a plan and stick to it.  I wish you the best and my heart goes out to you. You seem like a nice girl with a lethal addiction but you can be free if you really want.

As goingtomakeit says "when your desire to stop using drugs is stronger than your desired to use, then you will quit. Sending you a big hug and a kick in the ***, haha. im teasing, just sending the hug:) Hang in there Nat, you can do this