Vicodin taper help

[helpjen]

I am a 36 yr old mother of 3 and a wife. I am terrified over my usage and withdrawals  I have been using Vicodin 7.5/325- 2 at a time, just one dose a day for the last 2 years to make it through work, swimming lessons ect.  I have a herniated disc which causes chronic pain.  I also have frequent migraines and was just diagnosed with lupus with is seeminly causing some of them.  But that is besides the point, my husband has had to work overtime for the last 6 weeks, so I have bumped up my vics to 4 a day., and then for the last week 6 a day.  I wake up every morning with terrible burning in my legs and anxiety that I can't explain.  I think i am going through withdrawals although my last dose of the day is usually at 4pm.  I have horrible IBS without the narcs, to the point of loosing 5-10 lbs a week.  I want to quit more than anything and get this constant worry off my back, but I tried last week and the burning in my legs,hands shaking, and diarrhea was so severe I broke down and took 2 of the 7.5's each day in the morning and 2 more in the evening to make it through work, and then take care of the kids in the evening.  I can't take anytime off work and have no one to help with the kids (2- seven year olds and one eight year old) in the evening so I want to do a taper, that will make the withdrawals bearable.  I started these meds for the right reasons and now I believe I am physically addicted and the worry of this addiction is ruining my life and marriage.  My back pain will be much better in about a week as am having a steroid injection on the 6th which always helps so I won't need to meds for pain, although I am beginning to suspect I am using them in order to deal with life better. I have never had a problem with depression before and now I feel like I am a failure and the thought of wantind to die is always in the back of my mind. I have been reading this forum for the last week and really getting myself worked up, but I'm ready to live life without narcotics.  

[ochooked]

Totally agree with Rufusingbondage --- She is right - and you are right - your use is starting to spiral out of control and if you wait to address it, the problem are only going to get worse.  Opiates only affect our perception of pain  - not the pain itself - and you will find that the effectiveness of the opiate decreases over time while you will begin using more of the drug to achieve that same level you felt at first.  If you are brave enough and bold enough to address this in this early stage you may well escape the horrible W/D's that many us of have had to endure b/c of years of heavy opiate use.  I suggest you cut off your supply, and take the steps necessary to reclaim your life that is being stolen by the narcotics.  All the best.

[refusingbondage]

First - you are not a failure.  You are admitting you have a problem and that is a huge step and you should be proud of that.  Fortunately, although your addiction is beginning to spiral - you can stop it before it gets too bad.. at various stages of my addiction I was taking about 35 vico or 30 percocet a day.  These meds are used to treat pain but unfortunately our bodies become tolerant so we need to up the dosage and we become dependent so we need to take it to not get sick.  Many times the pain worsens because we go into withdrawal when the pills wear off.  I think that yes you are in the beginning of withdrawal in the morning.  My addiction got so bad I would have to keep my pills and a glass of water next to the bed and wake up half hour early to take them just so I COULD get out of bed.  But you can stop it. The power is with you.  Unfortunately I do not think there is any way to do it without experiencing some kind of withdrawal.  The good news is your dose is low enough to where you can taper and quit pretty soon.  You can also cold turkey.. tapering may bring some withdrawal and then undoubtly withdrawal at the end, cold turkey definitely will bring withdrawal but it will be shorter.  Tapering is hard for most as we cannot control what we take even if we try our best.. it would be ideal to have someone hold your pills and give them out to you.  If you were to cold turkey right now you will feel sick for about 6 to 7 days but much better thereafter.  Tell the kids mom has the worst flu ever and wait it out.. order pizza, guess what kids - cereal for dinner.. whatever you have to do.. thats what I had to do.  I am so happy you are ready to be narcotic free- I am 53 days clean now and it was the best decision of my life.. Remember there is never going to be a 'perfect' time to quit there will always be reasons why we cant - I told myself that for 10 years-but the longer you wait the worse this addiction can and will get and the harder to get off them.  Keep posting- there are so many here in your boat who are willing to help.  Best of luck to you and your family. You can break free from the prison of addiction with the right amount of strength, determination and support.  Take care.

[Billy__B]

I too am a chronic pain sufferer, i take morphine for mine, prescribbed by my pain management doc.  If u need the meds, and don't abuse them, then i don't see the prob.  IT is a demon to have the need for the meds and battle the addictive side too.  IMO Opiates are a MIRACLE if used properly with a doctor prescribing them.  My father has had 28 ish back surgeries and been on morphine since 1990, it is the ONLY thing that is keeping him able to live his life.  So, that's where i stand, but, if u want to taper then do NOT do it too fast! are your meds prescribed?

[owhatamistake]

I'm going to bump this in hopes that someone answers.  There is so much help here with exactly your problem.  Good luck!