day 15 can't believe i made it this far!

[detox1978]

well i finally am getting some sleep again 2/3 hrs back to back at night. doesn't seem like much but, i can't complain it's better than staring at the clock all night watching it flip minute for minute. there's a war inside my head and i believe i'm winning seeing it's day 15 and here i am still clean.i'm not craving opiates and that's a good thing. so i was thinking maybe this methadone maintenance program did do me some good after all. i mean lord knows I HATE the long recovery & wd period from it, but it got me used to not buying off the street for 4 yrs and i wasn't getting high off of the methadone. not that i don't remember how those beautiful pills made me feel so falsely happy for a long period of my life but, being on only methadone i guess made me feel like a normal functioning citizen of society.i mean after all you can't function properly if your on a hunt down for pills daily or constantly counting what you have left and your next score right? then it came down to just getting tired of the daily regimen of having to go to that damn clinic every morning! God how i hated it after a while. i've lost jobs, chances at jobs due to the early window of time that i could get medicated! so what now? I want my life back! i'm slowly regaining it day by day. some days are better than others.just when i feel pretty good, here comes captain withdrawal busting down the door to stick a boot up my *** that *******.i've been dealing with this lovely lower back pain and oh let me tell you it feels so freakin good! not really! i'm cold then warm/clammy/sweaty, it's a real treasured experience let me tell you.here's the wonder wall of it all... for the past 2 days i've been been extremely shaky at times. i'm not feeling nervous/anxious or any type of anxiety at all. what is this nasty feeling? i'm eating well. i just don't understand. it's a feeling kinda like when you're on your 3rd 4th day of wd and there's something you have to get done that requires you to stand for a while. that shaky i have to sit feeling where you can feel your legs trembling like crazy , but it's my entire body. i'm at the point where i'm praying for myself. really man upstairs 15 days? at the least i can say i'm still kicking my demons *** cause here i am and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!

[bama88]

i bet when you started fifteen days felt like a lifetime lol. and now time just keeps on ticking. im so glad you have gotten this far the next you'll see 30 60 90 120 and stop counting aren't ua feeling as strong as a tiger? or as i say....how can i fly like an eagle when im down on rhe ground with rhe turkeys. hahaha....so proud of you..so proud.

[detox1978]

thanks laural and lost i've been taking them since day two of my detox and they've helped A LOT. i think it's just an after effect of the methadone. kinda ***** that it takes so long to get back to normal from ths particular drug but, i'm keeping my head held high above water. things aren't as bad as they could be "at least that's what i've been telling myself". we push, we strive & we do whatever it takes to get threw. quantum physics claims you can place your mind anywhere if you really try. mind over matter right.

[LostNoMore]

Gnarly highly recommends the 3in1 supplement at Walmart. Calcium/Magnesium/Zinc. I take it and it helps with the crawly skin, the shakes and the raw nerve endings. I also do hot soaks, and take L-tyrosene for energy, plus DLPA> SamE and L-glutamine. Also Whey protein drinks
(walmart) are loaded with aminos.  We've done some damage to the structure of our brains and CNS. It's a process of re-building. Then for the
anxiety and mood swings, I use Kava tea and Valarian root. As far as sleep,
well, I've had one really good night in the past 35, but it does get better every day, just very slowy in my case. Take care. Hang in there. It gets better.

[laurel453]

it seems that you are working on being positive and going forward no matter the obstacles, this is good.... about the shaky feelings, not sure but you might try the mineral supplements, they might help with the muscles shakes...congrats on your 15 days !! :)

[5kitty5]

Nice to read your progress!  Your story gives me hope!  Please keep posting on your progress and ups and downs.  I too have the internal temp withdrwl symptoms and it mkes me crazy...one minute im freezing my butt off to sweating bullets!  I found that motrin helps a little with this...but I think of it like this..it is my boies way of getting rid of all of the toxins...so I try to be welcoming to this awful part

[detox1978]

thanks north and i know, i think we both do. i think it helps a lot to vent and talk about what w're going threw seeing we can all identify here. it's a long process a battle of will and constantly testing of our strength. congrats on day 14 by the way! keep it going and we'll get threw it!

[NorthEast213]

Congrats detox.  Im 14 days myself so I understand where you are at.  Keep it going man it's only going to get better!( so they tell me =) )