day 2 no oxycontin

[Cassie415]

After a 2 week relapse i have stopped again. Today is the second day without it and i am`pretty sick and feel horrible. I am in mexico for a vacation which is helping me not to get it because there is no way i can get it here. but i am really sick and have no energy to even move. my dad and his gf want to go out every night and drink and all that mexico type stuff and i am just dying. I was snorting about 200mg of oxycontin before i stopped so i no this detox wont be easy but I will have 5 days clean by the time i get home so i am hoping thats enough to just stay away and not get any more. I am very weak and sick right now and I just keep thinking about how nice a line of oxycontin would make me feel. anywys i am going to try really hard to stay sober this time. just wanted to post an update, thanks everyone for all the help.

[windowsca]

I'm here,too.  It's time.

[peaceinknowing]

I agree with what windowsca is telling you here. We are here right now for you, and I think you realize throughout everything you just posted here, that it's time for this to change right here and now. You're headed down a path to death, and if you love yourself and your parents that much, then you're going to do this for them and for you. You ARE important, whether your sister seems better off than you in your parents eyes. I have been there before, but never took on the attitude that you are right now. You have to look at it in this way -- your mother and father love you no matter what, and probably love you even more so than your sister because she never does anything wrong, period. HAHA! Don't get me wrong though, I love a goody two shoe every now and then but sometimes they are downright annoying, yeah?  LMAO!

You're going to get through this if I have something to say about it. The same goes for windows as well -- she and I have grown to know one another and if she has anything to say about it, you're going to get through this! I think that right now, you're so down and out because you're detoxing while on vacation and you don't have the "happy pills" in your system to give you that euphoria, and this might be the reason why you're coming off the way that you are, at least I'm hoping this is the reason why..

I have to get off of here to go to work, but you keep posting and give me some posts to come back to, please. Just remember that you are my sister in God and we are going to get through this. I'll even pretend that I'm still on my first day of sobriety and you're on your what... Third now? God! You're doing better than me girl. Go ahead with your bad self now!  <3  wink wink. We will talk when I get home from work.

[djd8080]

I'm on DAY 4 of quiting, what started as, 40 mg of percocets, then up to a couple OC 80's a day last week and even tried snorting H last week for the first time. I was spinning out of control worst than ever before. I've been taking pills off and on for 2 years. Before I quit Thursday, I was on a month or so binge. I thought there was no way I could quit this time. I've probably withdrawed 20 times in the last 2 years. I'd go a month or so and realize this isn't for me and quit but this time it felt impossible. I think it gets worse everytime. I'm 29...I'm athletic, outgoing and probably the last person you would imagine becoming addicted to pills but it happens. Don't feel bad about telling your parents...you're human. I'm a guy, like I said...an athlete, strong and felt unstoppable before taking these things but it crushed me. I had to tell somebody..so I told my Mom and she helped me through the weekend. Without her, I think it wouldn't have been possible this time. Cassie, you have to understand this is just a decision. Last night was so bad I thought I would die. I slept maybe a 1/2 hour. But you have to make your mind up and sometimes you need help. You're thinking right now isn't what it's going to be a couple days from now or even a month from now...it gets more positive everyday. Withdrawing is not going to kill us but the pills could and probably would. Each day will get better. I had to shut my cell off, I've got to cut the people I use with or that enable me out of my life. We are not going to live the lives we are meant to live taking pills like this. It's kind of funny but just say no. Don't think about it. When it's the middle of the night, you're suffering and can't think of one reason why you shouldn't take something or snort an OC to feel better, just say no and remember what no means. No I'm not going to let these things direct my life, no I'm not going to die and break my family's heart, no I'm not going to live my in a pill induced coma, no I'm not going to damage my body anymore, no I'm not going to sell everyone short including myself, my friends, my family, my God and everyone I'll meet and everything I'll do in the future. It's just what has to be done, you don't have a choice and the pain will be over and a distant memory before you know it. Someone mentioned divorce and using because of emotional pain. That's the trap I fell into. My sports career failed, my best friend died, my 6 year relationship, we have 2 kids, ended a couple years ago and so on...we all have problems and someone out there is always going to have more. The pills make the problems a billion times worse and only cover up your pain. It's still there and it has to be dealt with sober, plain and simple. No other choice. It *****...I know, but pill addiction is just one of life's tragic pitfalls. If you're going to live, you can't be addicted to pills. So to sum things up...you are strong enough, dig deep and find your inner strength, tell your parents or someone who can be with you and help you through it, keep your dreams and goals alive, remember to just say no and finally and most important...trust in God. If you don't have a relationship with God, get one. I'll pray for you and thanks to anyone who has helped me and please pray for me.

[Cissy373]

Boy will I pray for you and thanks for your post it truly helped me. We all have allowed a stupid pill to control our lives, really taking it away...........and like you I am sick of living in a pill stupor I want my life back.

Pray for me as well.

Cissy

[windowsca]

Great post DJD!  

[gizzy32]

Hope your hangin in there Cassie. You got a lot of great advice here and I hope you think about it. Let us know how you are today. I know you can do this with some help, NOW STOP BEING STUBBORN, lol. Hugs