Why even try

[Wigurl72]

Iam on day 7 of being off oxycodone but i am starting to feel like no matter what i do people including my husband just thinks i am and will continue to be the same person i have been this last year!  I have an appointment with the pain clinic on Wednesday and so tempted to just get more pills. Why deal with the physical and emotional pain if iam noy going to be viewed any different! :(

Feeling hopless!

[Wigurl72]

Thank you for your wonderful words of encouragement. :)  day 8!!

[Kresaera]

I didn't read all the answers, I just had to reply. My family expected me to fail like I had so many times before. They wanted me to succeed, but was waiting on me to fail. 7 days to us is a lifetime, but to your family, its just a week. Keep on proving them wrong. It took my family almost a year to give me money again, and even longer to fully trust me. Hell my mother in law still doesn't trust me.

Keep on and chin up¡ it will get better

[IW63boomer]

I am going into day 9 of hydrocodone withdrawal.  The worst of the pain stopped after day 6, but I am experiencing sleeplessness and depression.  On top of all of this, I have a sinus infection and that is messing with me!  I haven’t really had any sleep in days.  I take some Benadryl to get sleepy, but they don’t always work.  

When I look at how bad the symptoms were just a few days ago, I am very encouraged.  I know things will get better.  I try to focus on what I will feel like in 3 days, rather than what I will feel like in the short term.

Focus on your relationships as best you can.  Don’t make any promises or talk about the future.  Let your performance speak for itself.  You will get there, but it is not always an easy road to travel!  God be with you!

[Bkitty]

I wish that I could answer that question for you,,why try. Its soo hard in the beginning and at times like you said ,,pointless. You need to look really deep within side yourself and ask this. What kind of person do you want to be? Who are you? What kind of life do you want? What kind of relationships do you want with your family and husband? You need to find those answers and then you need to adjust your life and make the changes. Change is hard and uncomfortable,,esp at first. But its up to you to find the connection to you again. And you will,,its not an overnight change by all means. You are trying right now and that is all that matters. My mother aka lucifer and my husband said the same thing. They didnt think I was gonna change either. I was convicted of being a life long B*tch in their eyes. But after time and changing myself and my life,,,all my husband can talk about is how "different" I am these days. It doesnt happen overnight so dont overwhelm your mind with that. Keep your chin up and keep on keeping on. It will come in time,,I promise. The first month was the hardest for me. Anything and everything went wrong,,but I got thru it and you will too. Hang in there ((hugs)) ~Bkitty

[quitinoxys]

That's the spirit, keep it up right now you need to do this FOR YOU. The other people will have to get with the program when they do. Remember this is about you not them. God Bless---Rick

[LostNoMore]

I understand what you mean. I face the same thing. The only thing I can do is stay clean and keep getting healthier and be the person I want to be. It does take time to win people over.

[Wigurl72]

THANK YOU soooooo much to all of you!!  I am learning so much on here, you are all so kind and i would truly be lost without each and everyone of you!!  I am stronger than those pills that change who i am and want to be!!

Hugs and prayers. :)

[snakejones]

How YOU view yourself is the most important thing. Stay positive and work hard, and over time you'll even convince that slow-on-the-uptake husband of yours! If he is not supportive, you must be with people who are, like NA----and us. We're your best cheerleaders! And of course, yourself. Trust your judgment and don't let any outside negative input discourage you.
Everyone who quits gets bouts of depression, sadness, and anger. We all have to work through those emotions. You should feel better soon, especially when spring weather hits! I am praying for you right now, for peace, comfort, and strength. Hang in there, and talk to us. We care....

[quitinoxys]

Congrats on 7 days clean that's a great accomplishment and you should be very proud of yourself as all of us here are. I know how if feels like the darkest hour now but give some more time. Your emotions are all in an upheavel right now that is why you are questioning your commitment to get clean. Once you emerge on the other side of the tunnel people will start realizing how different you really are. So don't give up REFUSE the refill and just keep going forward. I will pray for you today. God Bless---Rick

[IwillDoThis]

Congrats on 7 days.  Just remember the person you became on these pills didn't appear overnight and isn't going to disappear in 7 days either.  You probably have some trust to win back of the people in your life and that takes time.  Try not to focus on the frustration of everything magically not better, show them in that you are better by being honest in how you feel, what you are going through.

Stopping pills is the easy part, it is managing all the emotions, feelings, cravings after the fact that trip people up.  If you seriously want to stop the pills why do you still have an appt at pain management?  Your brain will tell you things to get you to use, you will have all sorts of pains to justify taking another pill.    Start putting up some roadblocks to make it harder for yourself to obtain the pills - i.e. coming clean with your pain doc, cancelling that appointment - whatever it takes.

Why should you stop if no one is going to give you credit?  BECAUSE YOU ARE WORTH IT!!!!!!!

I know this is hard and you are struggling but move ahead for YOU because you want a different life for yourself, have patience in your recovery and over time you will have gained some respect back from your loved ones - more than anything else you have to want this for you and no one else.

I'm 48 days today off hydros and while it hasn't been a picnic I am so glad I made the decision.  After detoxing and enduring that awful period taking another pill is just not an option for me - I will not allow it.

Remember change does not happen overnight - it is a learning and growing experience.  Be easy on yourself, treat yourself with care.

Hang in there - you CAN do this!

[atthebeach]

keep your head up. it will get better. it does take time for your healing and for the healing of those around you.
dont believe the lie of the enemy of your soul. dont get anymore pills.
keep the faith. you can do this.
be true to yourself and the rest will follow.
sending hugs,encouragement,hope,prayers
debbie