Try natural medicine. See a homeopath or naturopath. If therapy hasn't worked and you're allergic to meds, what else is there? You didn't say if you tried the tricyclics. I'm assuming you have, but just wondering.
You could have a book of antidepressants, if you pointed to one I have tried it .
I feel your pain too! I have suffered for 30 years also and I'm on xanax too! It's the only thing I can take. I also cannot take anti -depressants because they all cause vomiting and have the reverse effect on me. My doc says it's rare but some peoples brain chemistry reacts the opposite on these meds! Just our luck! I need constant reassurance from loved ones telling me I'm not going to die! Prayer is what I always turn to!
Try a book called Natural Highs by Hyla Cass, a psychiatrist at UCLA. It will tell you a lot of what's available naturally to try. I've had it 30 years too, and I'm not allergic to meds -- some have helped, but none have cured, and withdrawal has been a killer. Therapy never worked for me, either. Some of us are just unlucky, I guess.
Its eerie that you mentioned that some peoples brain chemistries react differently to these medications. My sister-in-law was telling me that she had read a piece on the internet about how some peoples brains are wired differently then others and they have the opposite reaction to antidepressants. I also spoke to a girl Friday night who has suffered with anxiety and agoraphobia for almost 30 yrs. She to has the same bad reaction to antidepressants and theraphy hasn't worked for her. She is on clonopin 1mg three times a day. She said, she had a great job and then one day out of the blue she started having panic attacks that led to agoraphobia. She went though therapy and was given a antidepressant and ended up in the hospital. And her doctor turned around and gave her another antidepressant and she ended up in the hospital again. She finally got to the point that she had to quit her job. And she applied for SSD and was turned down five times before she got a lawyer who finally got her on SSD. She hasn't been to see her doctor or therapist much because of the agoraphobia and now she is scared to death they will stop her SSD. She wanted to know if they could stop her SSD because the Agoraphobia is preventing her from seeing her doctors ? I don't know the answer to that question. Maybe you would know, or know someone who would. I told her to talk to her lawyer, but she said, he is no longer a lawyer. Anyone know the answer to this question ? She said, not knowing is making her anxiety worse.
Brain chemistry is little understood. When meds don't work or work in strange ways, it's more likely liver metabolites or other parts of the immune system rejecting the medication. These medications are all foreign to our systems, and some bodies just reject them. Allergies are also an immune system problem, not a brain chemistry problem, so having an allergy to medication is, again, the body attacking it. That's also one of the reasons we get so many "side" effects from medication, and not just that for emotional problems, for all problems. In many ways, we're the guinea pigs for medication, as it's quite new to our physiology. Some day, our experiences will help get it right, if that's any comfort.
Meds are not the answer....... Maybe some vitamins supplementation will help a bit. but the fact is these only mask the problem. I eincourage you to go to itunes download hope help for your nerves by claire weeks. This book was the trick to get me over the hump.
I was on meds didnt help, talk therapy, helped a bit, vitamins, noticed nothing but after listening to this lady and atending church after about 4 months it finally sucomb to the techniques learned from the book and church.
I am a healer who works with a lot of clients that have struggled with high anxiety. In our office, we have had really great results using energetic approaches, such as advanced EFT and other kinds of energy medicines. It's a great a non-drug, non-invasive option that might make a difference for you. Some of my clients have struggled for many years with things like severe anxiety, OCD, PTSD, war veteran trauma, phobias, etc. Within a few sessions, many have gotten some relief and feel more like themselves again. Sometimes their anxiety can be completely and permanently neutralized. In other cases, it takes a few sessions. But most everyone I've seen seems to get at least some improvement in their condition....
It's worth a shot, and don't give up in your journey to heal. I thought I'd mention this stuff only because many people are not aware that there are other approaches available out there that can help, which do not require drugs.