I want to live, so why do i think of suicide?

[worrykid]

Im an 18 year old male and since late march i have been experiencing a variety of symptoms that i have now come to realize are symptoms of GAD. Since then i have been seeing a psychologist for a few weeks now and have a great support system at home with my parents. There has been one anxiety however that has been taking over my life. For some reason i have this terrible fear that one day im gonna wake up and want to kill myself. Now i want to be clear that I do not want to die nor do i have any plans of trying to commit suicide. But the thought of it has reduced me to tears at times and its the scariest thing i have ever had to deal with.I want to live and grow old and have a family, i dont want to die and yet these thoughts keep reocurring.  On top of that i have anxiety of getting board with my life. That what if one day I wake up and the wife im married to and the job that im in just isnt what I want. It shakes me to the core and i have no answers for my questions. If any has any adivice please help

[worrykid]

thanks for the advice. Do you have any tricks that have helped you out in the past,like anything that you have learned through therapy or from other people. Im seeing a therapist my self and we are still in the beginning stages were he is i guess evaluating my situation. Its nice to talk to him and get it all of my chest though.I just need different ways of approaching my anxiety issues and find one that suits me.

[ladyinwhite]

hi there.. what are you really worrying about? try to have an outlet, like sports, or do anything that may divert your attention, i've been there and i've attempted 3 times, but im still here, 'coz i realized so many things,, that my family as well as my friends loves me so much that they don't want to lose me, so get up, get out of the house, have fun, there are so many great things ahead of you. don't worry too much about the future and concentrate on the present. have time to chill and relax, try watching movies, ones that can make you laught your hearts out.. and keep saying to yourself, "i have a purpose in this life, so i don't want to waste it but i should move on and find out what's that purpose."

[silverberg]

thought I was seeing double,, ;-) , ditto what I said in same post! good luck