PMS Anxiety - Help!

[taylorm]

Hi. I was wondering if anybody has any ideas on a) helping to manage my EXTREME emotional PMS, and b) how to explain to other people.

Every month, for about 3 to four days before my period, I become a different person. I am fragile, I am emotional. The littlest thing will set me off. Repetitive noises bother me. My friends bother me. I'll become angry at nothing. It's horrendous. And most of the time, I'll realize it's happening, and that helps somewhat, but not altogether.

It's been suggested that I take SSRI's monthly to control the mood swings. I currently take EPO (Evening Primrose Oil, which has helped in the past), and am starting a multivitamin. I don't want to take pharmaceuticals if I can avoid it. Plus, I have no health insurance right now.

I am 28, and this was a big problem in my last relationship. Only the problem, I believe, is that it was just exacerbated by my taking birth control pills. I thought it would help. But instead of making the PMS go away, it was like I had PMS ALL THE TIME. I was moody, cranky, and annoyed at just about everything. We had started out with a good relationship, but eventually, I hated my boyfriend, I hated myself, and I hated everything. Until I stopped taking the pill.

But now I have anxiety over the breakup of the relationship. And what's worse, I'm worried that if I date somebody else, they are just going to run into this monster, and they are going to end up hating me.

I have one guy friend who is very supportive. He helps me a lot, but when I get really emotional, it stresses him out. I don't know what to do, because I don't want my mental problems to be a burden on people. Obviously, I have underlying stress and emotional issues, but they just come out in this horrible way every month, and I don't know that my constant depression doesn't have to do with this ridiculous monthly cycle I go through.

But I feel it's pathetic to say, oh, it was just PMS, after I've had an emotional breakdown - even if it's true. It seems weak. It seems "Hysterical." And I hate it. Does anybody have any ideas - especially if you have professional experience - of how to tell a guy, so that he retains his respect for me, that my monthly cycles are affecting my moods dramatically, that I am aware of this, and that I am doing everything I can to help it? I want to for the benefit of everybody. I just don't want to come across as a whiny female! This is a serious problem, and it's real. Please help.

[jess990]

If you are comfortable, just explain to him what is going on with your body, bring him to this site or others and show him how real it is and show him that you are working on a way to fix yourself, but help to understand it may take an while and to bear with you!

[taylorm]

Thanks for all the comments. Any thoughts on how to talk about this? I'm really uncomfortable bringing this up in conversation, but it's so real, sometimes I think it should be addressed. I just don't want people to write me off.

[jess990]

I am 33 years old and my symptoms began when I was 26. I was however, able to get things back on track by eating really good, very few carbs, and taking vitamins everyday (multi, fish oil, b complex, selelium and vit c) plus I drank a soy shake that contained a ton of amino acids plus soy and I felt great for 2 years. I went off this diet 2 years ago and have been plauged by anxiety intensly since then. So, I am going back on it. My period are HELL!! a few days before I am really bitchy and then during I am really out of it and then after I am a wreck emotionally, mentally, physically until about day 9 or 10. I understand. I had my horomones checked and I am very low on Estrogen so taking the soy does help, I just have to get back to that again. I have heard that taking Welbuturin or Serafem around that time helps, you only take it then, but I don't want meds so I cannot say personally. My periods are my WORST time. My gyn says I am premeni and my mom was very early on too, so 28 is not so far off. The thing is, when your anxiety increases, your horomones get off whack and vice versa. Try eating really good, whole foods, natural and drinking soy shakes, you can get them in the vitamin section of any store, look for the natural one and take daily vitamins, MILD exercise, like walking. I am going back to this routine because it worked for me before so I will keep track in my daily mood tracker and let you know.

[FitOverForty]

It definitely can be related to hormones.  Afterall, when women start perimenopause (30+ www.womentowomen.com) anxiety is one of the main symptoms that arises from it.  A lot of doctors try to prescribe anti-depressants for this but, if you workout, it totally does the opposite and razzles your nerves more.  I take ativan as needed and I work out, eat right and just about do everything right.  I tried just about every natural herb out there and when the hormones are out of whack..a sedative is my ONLY help.  Also, when hormones are out of balance they cause a lot of weird emotions..I find myself getting very nervous and/or depressed most of the time and getting angry is seldom for me.  I'm 45 and I definitely noticed a major change in my moods for about 1 1/2 years now.  My doc thinks I'm too young for perimenopause but she's obviously wrong.  

My daughter is your age and she goes through the same mood swings but she also has anxiety due to a very stressful life working nights.  She sometimes needs a sedative or tries to sleep it off.  She's had panic attacks before so I would recommend you find a free clinic to go to so that you get the help you need.  

Hope this helps.

[Katie35801]

Hi,
I have no advice, as I can't control my own pms. Mine starts about 1 week before I actually start bleeding. It is VERY real, hormones are a crazy thing! I just wanted to let you know you aren't alone!

[trish2828]

I have been diagnosed with anxiety disorder and I control it pretty well with exercise, but I have some of the same issues right around my period.  When I asked my doctor if anxiety could be hormonal he said he didn't think so, but I think so.  Someone told me to drink soy milk because it has something in it that acts like a hormone????  I have been drinking a glass a day and I have noticed a difference.  I too like to use natural methods and this does seem to help some.  I hope you can find answers.