paranoia, jealousy and anxiety.

[JessRM]

hi everyone, i need some help. im a 17 year old girl and i have bad anxiety and im very paranoid, its so bad i think everyone is trying to hurt me im very suspicious of everyone, even my own family and friends. im also very jealous too. i was raped at 15 by someone i knew well and that made me worse. i cant seem to be happy with anyone if im with someone if they even look in the direction of another girl i go crazy, even if its just innocently looking on. i feel the need to control my family or friends or anyone really. im think everyone is laughing at me when i walk in town i just feel like hiding. what can i do to get rid of feeling like this? i dont have many friends due to being stuck in my room as i feel safer in here. ive been bullied my entire life becasue i didnt fit in or i was in high classes. i have no confidence i wont even step to the door without makeup on. my family arent really there for me, my friends have their own life and my docter well she just thinks im over exaggerating and i feel pressured by her to get help but i have a fear of speaking to anyone as im afraid they will cart me off to the nut house and i dont have the confidence to talk face to face. i really want to get help. any ideas?

[remar]

Great advice Birdie. I agree with writing things down at home where she feels safe and then taking it to her counselor.

[birdie0907]

There is a teenage section on MedHel that you might find is better for your needs than this community. However that is up to you and I am not trying to dissuade you from posting here. However, we are not professional counsellors, and even if we were could not help much from here.
Your doctor is providing good advice. Your feelings need to be brought out in the open so a helpful therapist can give you some advice, but only you can make that decision. Otherwise you may suffer all your life with problems that you are capable of overcoming, but just didn't have the right tools shown to you.
Start writing down right now everything that you feel, make an appointment and take it all to the meeting. That is part of the honesty that you need to bring to the therapist, and it may be much easier to submit paper than to speak about it. If you just try to say it in front of them, you might get embarrassed and hold back important facts.
With a full picture in front of them, it is much easier to study your situation than if you keep coming back over weeks with little bits coming out each time.