Aa
How do i deal with this?
Last month i had protected sex for a minute with a csw. My anxiety that i got HIV started then. The mods on medhelp said i am at no risk. I took 4th gen duo combos after 12,26 and 31 days along with a rna pcr after 16 days. All came negative. The doctors tell i should be negative based on the tests i took. But even after so many tests, some part of me is unable to believe this. But my mind still wants to do a test after 6 weeks cus apparently thats when a 4th gen in conclusive. The anxiety is so bad, i am now questioning if the blood draws were done using new needles or not. I have checked myself into therapy for anxiety and adhd and will hopefully start on a plan with my therapist from next week. If anyone has been in a similar situation before, what i want to know is does the need for testing ever end? Does therapy help?
Best Answer
We will not answer any HIV questions here as this forum is FOR anxiety. Anxiety only. And yes, you are over the top with anxiety. You are having obsessive, compulsion thoughts. How do you get over that? First you can try with out medication but medication such as a serotonin reuptake inhibitor can really benefit with this type of anxiety. But mostly, you need to use exposure response strategies. Which means first to identify it. "Oh, I'm having X thought again. " Or use your name "X(your name) is having that anxiety thought again". Call it out for what it is. Then the next step is to not engage with it. What is engaging with the thought mean? Looking something up on the internet, asking someone for reassurance, researching in any way, TESTING, etc. Even sitting and trying to reason your way out of it. Instead. Leave the thought alone and yes. You will feel uncomfortable.Discomfort is not a bad thing, it just doesn't feel great at the time. But if you can leave the thought alone, it eventually go away. Uncertainty is part of life. Learn to be comfortable with uncertainty. It's the only way.
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I am going to take one final test next monday. If thats negative, then i will try what you suggested and see if my therapist can incorporate this into my treatment as well. Because you are right, i have to somehow learn to be comfortable with uncertainty. My life seems to have turned upside down because of one thing i did. Now i dont know if it will ever go back to be the same. I dont even know if i will stop this constant need for re assurance. But thank you for your suggestions
well, that's just feeding your anxiety and I"m not interested in testing. YOu say it is the last, doubt it. The only way to get over it is to literally move on and leave it alone.
I understand and like you said i tried controlling myself when the thoughts came. I try fighting it but this terror of becoming positive in this next test grips my heart and it starts beating so fast i just feel like throwing up. Because of the 6 week conclusiveness thats drilled into my head, i cannot stop myself from the test either.
It's likely that your deleted posts about this same situation since you just joined MH last month.
You think Sept 18th will be your final test, however that's unlikely considering how many purposeless tests you have taken already. And the fact that you ignored the August advice means you need your therapist's help to try to ease your worrying about something impossible.
Hopefully you change your appointment so you can see your therapist soon instead of putting it off until you take another placebo test.
You think Sept 18th will be your final test, however that's unlikely considering how many purposeless tests you have taken already. And the fact that you ignored the August advice means you need your therapist's help to try to ease your worrying about something impossible.
Hopefully you change your appointment so you can see your therapist soon instead of putting it off until you take another placebo test.
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