My Adult son pretends he likes me!!

[mom53]

I can't believe I have been gone from this site for two years!  I just found you again.  My heart goes out to all of you. I have been reading so many sad posts.  My Adult son acts like a sociopath with ADD.  I also bend over backwards to help he and his wife, but it always ends up with me angry because he rarely pays me back and when he does, he makes me feel guilty because they are broke.  He says he likes me but treats me like he hates me.  

Point, we bought him a riding mower so he could mow our lawn and repay us 1500 that we loaned him to buy a car. the mower was the same amount.  My lawn looks horrible and everytime I say something about it, he gets mad at me, saying he is too busy.  Today I told him to bring the mower back, yes he has it, and I will do it myself.  He became really upset and said I was not human.  I loaned him my gas card to put gas in his truck and the mower, and I gave him my home depot card to pick up parts for his jobs (he is self employed).   Am I a fool, yes, I was trying to help them  .  So yes, I am upset that my lawn looks like trash.  

Also he is divorced and is supposed to pay child support, he is behind of course, so this is bad too.  Well he promised his ex that he would put the kids on the bus in the morning for her to save money.  He doesn't do it anymore, I do.  I love them dearly and will continue to do this, but see how much he pushes onto me and then says I am not human.  The grandkids make me happy, so if I can help his ex, I will do whatever.  

I am with all of you. I am shutting down the gravy train, getting myself some counseling and giving up right now.  I love him but he makes me crazy and sad!!

I will continue to read all your letters to keep me sane.  Blessings to all of you...

Nina

[mom53]

Thanks for the support Ella.  I am just tired.  I am 55 but feel so much older.  
Nina

[Ella789]

  It made me really sad to read your post,  I'm sorry that your son is treating you so horribly !!!    I think you are being used as a doormat  and from your own son is just too sad.     By all means,  do cut off the gravytrain,  he needs to get a dose of the real world.    
  Take care of yourself and the grandchildren and let the others fend for themselves.  

Best wishes

Ella