Why is it so hard to admit panic/anxiety ??

[TOLD YOU]

I been having problems for 4 years ..they found a year ago that I needed a Total Thyroidectomy for mulitnodular goiter.  Anyways all my problems were blamed on that after it was found, before that I was told I have anxiety and needed this med and that med.  ' I ' choose not to believe it, I still think there is something very wrong with me and no one cares to find out they are just blaming it on anxiety !
Well it has been a year since the TT and I am still having problems, I lurk at this board  and everyone here is ME !!
I have all the nite time problems of waking up, heart pounding, very pale and feeling faint, I even sometimes have to walk outside because I can not be still I just want to run !!
My PCP  knows I have these problems but she knows I wont admit it so she told me when I got ready for meds she would give them to me.
WHY do I continue to let this get the best of me when there are meds out there to help.  I was on Xanax at one time then stopped as I found out it was very addictive and it almost killed me getting off of it.
I want another baby, so does my husband so I can not take these meds and have a baby.
I would LOVE another, but I am so scared of all the 'episodes' I have, I think what would I do if I had a baby to tend to and feel like this.
I would not make it !!!

What helps you, how can I get use to this or admit this.
Dana

Symptoms:
heart pounding
feeling of insides very shakey
out of touch with reality (like I am not even really here)
feeling very dizzy or faint
CRYING...alot...
fullness in my head

these come and go sometimes they last for hours something everyday for weeks and sometimes 10-15 minutes and its over.

[RubyWitch]

Hi toots,
It does sound like you have some anxiety going on. Did your doc explain that thyroid problems can be connected with anxiety? Even tho you had the surgery, things, I believe, can still be out of whack.
That you recognize yourself here is good. You should also see then that there are a great many options to help you. Yes, admiting this CAN be difficult for many of us. There are many reasons for that. That panic and anxiety and depression are listed as "mental illness" stops many from seeking help for fear of the "stigma," or fear it will somehow get back to their employer or family and friends.
My humble advice is to get with your doctor and tell her everything you've told us. Especially your desire to have a baby. That will help her with her decision regarding meds. You may also be able to get through all this with some therapy and no meds, or just a very short course to help you right now. Have your doc refer you to a good therapist, preferrably one who understands anxiety/panic disorders. And also one who has a really good understanding of the meds involved. You are very wise to avoid Xanax. Taken on a p.r.n. (as needed) basis is fine, it's an excellent med for that as it works fast and is very effective, but you do NOT want to get into taking it on a daily basis. There are many, many other options out there which are much safer.
So, get back with your doc, tell her everything, tell her your concerns about specific medications, talk about some therapy.........there is help, so don't lose hope. You'll be fine, I promise. And if and when you get ready for that baby, a good long talk with your OB/GYN about any meds you're on or have been on is advised.
Please keep us posted, OK? And post as often as you need to!
Peace
Greenlydia    

[TOLD YOU]

I have posted on the thyroid board, but I think this is where I belong also.

Every post I read on here sounds like me.