34 months old

[rahee]

I am posting this question with a very confused state of mind. Please help if you have any such experiences. Here is my concern:

Our 34 months old son had separation anxiety, but as he is growing he is not uncomfortable in other people's presence. BUT, he does not play with other kids. I have to accept that we do not have any friends with kids so could I say that he will eventually become alright in this area? I have been reading stuff on autism, and saw that one of the signs is not interested to play with other children.

We have put him in a toddler program at a preschool, where he is not doing well at all.It has been three days, and he has not shown any signs of improvement. I am afraid it it will turn out to be a traumatic experience for him and backfire. Something we are doing to help him socialize should not result in causing permanent damage to our son.

He talks a lot but we are not able to understand what he says, not sure if it is too early to consider speech pathologist or therapist? Kindly help, I do not want to put our son through unnecessary torture, but want to help him get over any problem (if he has).

On the positive side, he always sings, catches up tunes  of his favorite songs pretty well.

[rahee]

Yes.Your guess is right. He is the only child, and am not sure if he is confused with so many languages he hears around?! I am so glad to read the responses. It is comforting to know that I do not need to rush to a conclusion. Did you say two of your "eleven" grandchildren? wow. you are a happy grandparent.

[allmymarbles]

You don't say whether he has siblings. Social exchange and sharing might be more difficult for an only child. As for his speech, two of my 11 grandchildren did not speak until they turned three, and then you couldn't shut them up. (Before they spoke they understood what you were saying.) Another possible problem - he may be too young for school. Boys typically need more time to develop than do girls. Making friends with other mothers with children is a good idea.

[rahee]

Thank you. I am working hard on creating a network for my son. That should help, I am sure. BTW, This is the first time when he is  separated from me, so I think you are both right, I should give him some time...

[RockRose]

I think you need to make friends with other parents of preschoolers.    It doesn't sound like he has any way to interact with other children in an environment where he feels safe.

Is there a gymboree,  or a children's museum that has a playgroup you could join and meet other mothers,  and allow him to interact with other children while you are right there close by?

[Sandman2]

  If he had separation anxiety before, I would think that he would not immediately react well to new surroundings.  That may be the problem he is having at his new preschool.  I think putting him in the school was a good idea.  Let his teachers get to know him, and then get their opinion.
    Kids don't change overnight.  And if this is his first experience away from home, he probably will not act like he enjoys it.  Also, having just one possible sign of autism, and that being not interested in doing something that he is not used to doing, is not much of a sign of anything.
   Maybe others can chip in with ideas on how to ease the transition to preschool.