Hiding behind couch at 4 yrs old to poop his pants, so he knows when he has to poop, then smears it all over my house! HELP :(

[mommababysitter]

4 yr old hides behind couch to poop his pants, so he knows when he has to go, he will poop and not even tell me then it gets all over the his clothes and eventually on my furniture and carpet, hes gone on the potty chair so many times, he'll even just go n and go then yell at me to wipe him, just doesnt care that poop is n his pants? tried all the reg stuff, taking toys away, rewarding for going on chair, EVERYTHING...have 3 kids of my own and babysit 6 little ones now, have never been thru anything like this b4...PLEASE HELP! I may have to quit watching him, but I love him, his sister and parents...don't want to but I can't have poop smeared all over my house. If he was 2, ok, or maybe learning disability, etc. but this little guys smart...at a total loss :(

[mommababysitter]

Thx so much for your help and concern, i really appreciate it...this is tough for me, i love kids and have 3 of my own...the parents r really working with me on this also...he's doing same things at home! Hopefully with us on the same page we can figure this out..thank u again.

[blair4385]

I agree with this! I know I feel guilty all the time about my kids being sick or just anything. Always feeling like am I doing right by my kids. I have 4 kids and I am far from being a perfect mother but I do hope to give some positive advice to others, and hopefully get some in return, thank you again by the way for talking with me about my son who has pectus excavatum

[mamawith2girls]

Margypops, do you even have children?? I don't mean to take over this thread, but I've noticed a trend of blame in  your posts, and any parent or caregiver who cares enough to come on the internet to seek advice cares about the children they post about. This lady takes care of six children, which is extremely common now that many two parent families have to work and afford childcare. 4 year olds are wily little creatures. You'd be surprised how quick they can wreak havoc in a matter of seconds....but of course, you would know that if you had kids. And if you do have kids, then share your experiences. If you don't have support to offer and only blame, I'm sure we can count on our mother-in-laws for that! You actually asked a lady if she yells at her kid because she has emotional problems! And "how did that baby fall out of the highchair? Maybe the father is doing something wrong?" It just seems odd.

I would hate for parents to be deterred from posting questions on MedHelp for fear of being judged or accused of ill-parenting, when we parents already judge ourselves and question ourselves and feel guilty on a fairly regular basis about whether we are doing the best job we can or not. Many people posting here just need reassurance and guidance, advice, direction, empathy, etc.

I don't mean to be offensive, and I'm sure you don't intend to come off this way. Obviously you come here on a regular basis so you have a keen desire to help, which is awesome. I just thought you should know that this is how you are coming off.

[blair4385]

This little guy isnt much different from lots of other little kids. I am a mother of 4 and let me tell you, I get pooped smeared around the house too LOL. But here is the thing, when kids are potty training they will sometimes hide when they have an accident because they have learned that its not ok to go potty on themselves.....I have found my three year old buttnaked under his bed several times because he used it on himself, took his clothes off and hid from me.. They do that because they are embarrased. The smearing of the poo, I dont know why they do that buy my 5 year old even still does it. He doesnt have accidents anymore but when he is on the potty and he wipes, if he gets some on his finger he will wipe it on the wall LOL, so guess thats probably why they do it, they stick their hands in their pants and they dont want it on their fingers so they will wipe it on whatever is around them.

[margypops]

May I ask if he is supervised how he is able to do all this ?