adoption support

[everley2014]

Have any of you ladies put your child up for adoption, or are any of you planning to? I'm looking into my options, which are adoption and parenting. I want what's best for my baby, despite my emotions. I'm only 16 and i live in a very awful house full of drugs. There are only 2 rooms here with 7 people. I sleep on an air mattress. There is hardly ever any food here and I'm always hungry. We never have money for anything and we have no transportation. I dont want my baby to grow up under these conditions.  I was in an on and off relationship with the babys father and the plan was to live with him when he got his place. Yesterday we got into an argument. He ended up choking me because i wouldn't give him my phone. That was the last straw so i left him for good. I'm scared to have him be the father of my baby. Without him, i know i couldn't ever support my child. I'm very seriously considering adoption. My child deserves so much more than i can give it.

[bumpinbaby1995]

This is really a sad situation , I couldn't even imagine . While your considering adoption have you looked into women's shelters ? & food stamps ? Also where's your family ?

[2ndBabyDueFeb13th]

You are doing the right thing by thinking about the best interest of your child. It takes a strong and smart young woman to leave a no good man who puts hands on her. That is an amazing step. I would advise u to visit churches or charity in your area because they are known for having resources for young women who are pregnant and in abusive situations or drugs. I hope this helps and wish u he best

[amanda_m123]

you are so strong for considering this option, & I have so much respect for you. choosing to let a family give your baby the beautiful life he/she deserves is one of the best decisions you can make as a parent when you know you can't do it yourself. be proud of yourself, don't feel guilty. if you know that's the best decision for your baby, don't let anybody tell you different.

[katyrb]

Don't feel guilty honey! And don't let anyone talk down to you about adoption! So many people would get an abortion instead of trying to give their baby the best life possible.  Whatever you choose, nothing can change the fact that you are that babies mother and gave him or her the best you could.

[Kirstie_MHModerator]

We have a wonderful adoption community here:
http://www.medhelp.org/forums/Adoption/show/193

Some ladies who participate there were adopted themselves, or adopted a child, and can offer you information and share their experiences.

[Josie_Sophia]

There is no reason for you to feel guilty you are being a good mother to your unborn child. You know it deserves a home and parents who can give it everything that you are unable to do at the moment. If anything you should be proud that you're so mature and responsible at such a young age! Kudos to you! If you need to talk or vent or just someone to listen to you there are plenty of us who are here for you. Keep strong and know that it will all be ok!

[katyrb]

I have so much respect for you and how clearly you want to do what is best for your little baby. Adoption would a beautiful gift for both your baby and a couple praying for a child. There are many options...open, closed, whatever you think is best for your situation. Many times you can meet and choose the adoptive parents and build a relationship with them throughout your pregnancy if that's what you want. Often they help with cost of prenatal care. A good place to start gathering information  is your local Catholic Charities. Good luck, I'll be praying for you!

[lopezladee]

You are a strong and awesome woman!! I dont know about the adoption process but just wanted to say you are amazing! So many people just think a baby will be fun and attention so they opt out of adoption. You know your living conditions and love your baby and want the best for it.  I know it has to be hard, but I am so proud of you!! Thank you for being unlike so many mothers and putting a child in danger. My prayers go out to you!

[everley2014]

Thanks ladies. I'm just so torn up inside. Ive been feeling my baby move so much and i feel so guilty.

[cjwtbw]

Even though it will be terribly hard for you, it seems like the best plan, my mom gave up my oldest brother when she was 15 and asked for an open adoption, unfortunately it didn't work out the way she intended, but an open adoption I think is the best, be a part of your baby's life as much as you can if you want that :) I hope everything goes well for you

[julieeenewmum]

It sounds like your mature enough & love your kid enough too know what's best for you & him or her your giving that baby the best thing anyone could give them a chance at a happy healthy life & after your done getting the baby into a nice home you should look into emancipation & getting yourself out of there

[vicciMarie]

Even though your struggles are very much evident, adoption is most likely your best bet. There are closed adoption where you sign all rights away or there is an open adoption where you get to see the child as often as the adoption parents will allow. There should be peer groups that you could attend. But alas I have no links to forward help to you. All I can do is encourage you to do what is in your heart and if adoption is what's best then use that along with your living situation to spur you on to achieve greatness for your future. Your stronger then you look and braver then you think. Good luck and I'm sorry for lack of info as im a UK resident. Wish you had the same help we did x

[kymii]

If deep down u think tht its a good option and u know its not a good environment there for you baby then do adoption there is no shame in wanting more for your child and in the end you will be happy for what you did

[jordyvi0824]

There's actually a forum just for adoptions :) you will probably get a lot more advice there

[SlavicaTurpin]

Good for you young lady. That sounds like a great option. That baby deserves the best he can get. He will probably thank you later on in life.