My girlfriend won't have sex with me

[kayak1989]

I'm 19 and so is my partner. We've been together for nearly two years. But we only have sex about once or twice a week. I do beliveve in romance, snd i do make quite a lot of effort. (going out for meals, holidays, suprise trips out and presents). But even four days in paris, nice hotel, and all the sight seeing, she  was still only interested once. We do have fun, playing squash, walking dogs and the like, but the romantic side of thigs seems to be so scripted with her, i could give you details of every sexual encounte, because they have very little varation. unless i pretty much force it. I don't mind that as much as the fact that unless i push the issue, i don't think there would be any sexual encounters at all.
On the romance side of things, the only things she buys me, are things that anyone who even vaguely knows me, wouldn't get me, like chocolate, sweets and very old man ish clothes. I can't stand sweets, and she should know this, by the way i always refuse them. I am not one to beat round the bush, if  i don't like something, i'll say. OBVIOUSLY, not nastily, but at some point i will make it very clear. I am not an unsensitive person.
Why does she not want to have sex with me more? I used to be madly in love with this girl but the constant rejection in the bedroom is pushing me away. There are only so many hugs and kisses i can give. I am quite a sensual person, and i do like sex. i know she enjoys it, without going into details.
But it is hard work getting her interested.
What am i doing wrong? and am i immoral for wanting to leave her because of it? I don't want to cheat on her but on drunken nights out it has been close.
Please give me your thoughs and opinions, no matter how frank.
Thanks in advance

[worried159]

you are young 1/2 times a week is good youll see that when your old and married. heres my guess. a big % of girls do not orgasim while having sex. Here's what to do, Make her climax orally. Take your time and be gentle. If you love her you will. Then after she has"gone" do your thing with her. If you make her happy by making her climax she wont mind if you take 3-5 minutes to get off. good luck.

[dparadiso09]

yep you are pretty immoral for wanting to dump a girl after 2 years bc she wont **** you every night. let me tell you the average amount of sex people have in relationships is about 2 per week. why would want to cheat on her? bc that girl would be one night anyway, after being in a long relationship a hormone called oxytocin "the cuddle hormone" releases and sex isnt as passionate and on the mind 24/7. but if your a big enough jerk as to consider leaving/cheating on your gf after 2 years maybe you are the type of guy who wants no commitment sex and with any girl any time then i feel bad for her and you should leave her. if your just horny and had a perverted jerk moment then consider this sex with her 2-3 times a week is better then you could prolly get which random hookups with girls anyway. dont stop loving a girl bc shes not a nympho thats ****** up.

[jamie4br]

Honestly, if you've tried talking to her several times and nothing has changed, then nothing is likely to change. This is coming from experience... more than once. I wasted many good years looking to change a woman. It doesn't happen that often. It's not like she's a bad person or anything, it's just that not all people are sexually compatable.

As for sassylady, having sex BEFORE marriage is key so you don't get stuck into this kind of situation for LIFE. This is exactly why people cheat and get divorced. Know your partner sexually BEFORE you get married. Marriage is a legal contract for life! Why leave anything to chance???

[heatherlynn22]

perhaps she doesn't want it more then that. not every woman likes to have sex 2 times a day every day. there are some of us who are happy with 2-3 times a week. hubby and i manage 2-4 times a week and we are more than satisfied with that.

if you can't handle 2-3 times a week save the girl the heart ache of you possibly cheating on her and break up with her. breaking up with her is kinder than cheating on her.

[SassyLassie]

Well, call me old fashioned, but, if you are not married, then I feel you really have no business having sex at all. I know, "everyone does it" but, that does not make it right. Sex was reserved for a husband and a wife, and unless it is done in that matter, it never will be truly ful-filling, God simply did not intend for it to be that way.

To me, there is nothing more romantic than having saved yourself for your future husband/wife, and then on the wedding night, giving yourself to him/her, it is the ultimate love gift. You both belong entirly to one another.

But, like I said, I am old fashioned I guess.

[teko]

They have a saying about young guys. I do not mean this in a disrespectful way, so do not take it that way. It is said that a young guy is, Young, dumb and full of come.  Now with that said, your sexual appetite is very strong, much more so than your gf. This is very normal. It is also well known that a female comes into full sexual maturity at 30 something. That is not to say they do not enjoy sex before then, but not at the same rate as you.  As you get older, this will calm down, but for now, let me tell you that getting it a few times a week is really good for your gf. Lots of guys would be so jealous of you, they may be getting it one time a week or even one time a month or worse. Nothing to be upset about.