attracted to another man should i leave my husband?

[Laurka]

HI!!! so glad i found this forum.. Hope to get some fresh opinion, please help! I have been married for over 3 years, no kids. Everything started from such a strong love... he proposed after three dates... we were married in 6 months. I am 25 years old now, and my husband is 42 years old... once upon a time, we used to have such a passionate and mind-altering intimate relationship.... however it's been so long ago... Now, we have sex once in three months. And i found myself in the situation when I am madly attracted to another man... with my whole heart and sexually...There is nothing i can do without thinking of him...think he is attracted to me as well (but he does not know i am married) and he is 24 years old we have more in common then i do with my husband. I now came to the conclusion that my sexual life with my husband is not going to improve in the future, and if i stay i will be stuck like this for the rest of my life... but i have so much respect for him

[mami1323]

You know the old adage "the grass isn't greener on the other side"?  Well that would fit here perfectly.  This affair is fun and exciting because it's new but that's all there is.  I don't know why people do this, if you aren't happy with your husband then why didn't you just leave him.  Instead you are doing something that will destroy this wonderful man and your child.  Have you ever tried putting in the effort with this new guy with your husband?  My advice is let go of the other man and try to reconnect with your husband.  Go to counseling.  

[el_em_en_oh]

Old post, but obviously still a 'hot-button' for more than one person...

*You're 40 years old
*Your husband is 52
*You've been married for 12-years (are currently married)
*You have an 8y/o daughter,
*You've been seeing a 32y/o guy for over a year.
*Your husband is awesome and a great guy,
*He does everything for you, spoils you, cares for you, and you love him

I'm not sure what to say about this besides... FAIL.

You have an infatuation with a younger man, and I'd say that there's probably some mid-life crisis buried in there. Unfortunately, life isn't all about having fun all of the time (which you've found in this 32y/o).

You don't mention whether or not you LOVE this 32y/o... do you?

There is so much wrong with what you're doing, that words fail me at present. Someone else want to take this one? I'm a little disgusted...

[SpanishGirl]

Well, is been nearly 4 years of Laurka's post and still people posting comments. I wonder what happened. My story is so similar too. I am 40 years old and my husband is56, we have been married 12 years and have a daughter 8 years old. Our sexual life is almost nonexistent. I met a 32 year old guy and we been seing each other for a year. Sex is amazing with him, I never enjoyed sex as much as I do now. I am crazy about this guy and I love him. I been thinking about leaving my husband for this guy. My husband is been great during our marriage, great person, great father. He does everything for me, spoils me and cares about me. I love my husband but is more like loving a father than a man, I care about him a lot and dont want to hurt him, although I know what I'm doing is not right...There is no day that goes by without me thinking about what to do. I need to make a decision but i don't seem to be able to make one....What should I do?

[diva00star]

omg IM going through the same thing too! im 19 my husbands 23 and well weve been married for almost 2 years and ive spend most of the 2 years complaining about our marrige.... hes really not the person i thought he was.. but i met this great guy! he knows im married and he wants me to divorce and marry me... thing is ive know this guy since i was 8! and we just came across eachother after many years! and funny thing is that i had a crush on him when i was 8 and weve been talkking for a while one thing let to another before i knw it i was calling my husband my his name! he makes me feel amazing! like no guy has ever had before! hes o my gosh ooo soo wonderful!  hes an amazing guy! maybe it was him that was ment for me after all what do you think?

[True007]

I am living the exact same thing but reverse. My wife is attracted by another man.

We are happy together, we always communicate what we feel and want and I always try to make her happy in everyway. Travelling, romantic moments, having fun and going out as well as giving time to eachother seperatally.

We have been together 6 years now and I am still attracted and passionatly in love with her. But she is not towards me.. at least not as much as she used to. She told me she is no longer attracted to me and that she wanted to work on this issue. I started going to the GYM and workout and lost 15 lbs in 1 month and look forward to ''looking'' better for her but I fear that it is out of my control.

She said she loves me and wants to stay with me but I can feel it in her heart that she wants to live something I can't give her.

I see this like a child wanting candy. She is not acting like an adult but like a child just thinking of how sweet the candy would taste not realizing that she is losing something of greatest importance doing so. Our love and our commitment to sharing our lives and living a good life together.

My suggestion to you is ''know yourself' and work this out with your husband''. If he loves you he will do whatever it takes to make you happy. If this is too much for him then both of you will know that it has ended. But if it works out you will be very happy and all these feelings of confusion will go away.

[lovinlife111]

Honey,  Let me tell you - life is too short, don't waste any more than 3 years.  I am 53 and my husband is 70.  I have stayed married to him for 25 years and should have left after 5 years.  I have fallen in love with a 41 year old and I am working on being out of here.  I have a second change at 53 and if you have a second chance at 25, don't waste one minute.