Did you try talking privately to his doctor who supplies him with this medication. I know of a person who had the same problem as your husband but fortunately for his wife he was taken off the medication and is ok now.
There is another thread on here entitled "How much testosterone is too much". If you can find it, there is some good insight to be had there.
I know from personal experience what it can do to a guy and I'm willing to offer what advice I can, but I suggest you read that thread first.
This could also be a matter of several contributing factors, too much T, repressed anger, feelings of inadequacy/insecurity. The black and white switch is worrisome in terms of a personality disorder that may not have been apparent before he felt "good enough" on testosterone I.e. more masculine energy, improved mood and sense of self, however;what you've described also points at a narcissistic or schizoid adaptation of a borderline personality. He may have felt inadequate and been the "perfect doting husband and father" in the early stages of the relationship. Coupled with low t, depression and or anxiety symptoms would be apparent unless the person were quite good at manipulating the way they're seen to others. Fix the testosterone, anxiety and depression and you've got a person beyond reproach whom demands their every need be met, even to the detriment of your health and safety;physical, mental, sexual. If he doesn't seem to care, perhaps he doesn't and you're experiencing late stages of being a primary source of narc supply. It bears exploring. Personal experience has given me deep insight into exactly your type of situation. My heart to you, be blessed.
Hello... word for word the same happened to me and my fiancé!!? His anger is violent and he has forced hinself on me as well! He called my late husband’s best friend a ****** ( he’s gay ) so I’ve lost all my friendships and my late husband’s family because he is jealsous my late husband was an attorney and made great money. It’s so sad I love him but he diesel HIMSELF with his own bought kind!??? I left him and with one agreement wto see a psychiatrist changed everything and for me to be with him he cannot do it at all. Now it’s little sex ( not even a tad like when I first met him! ) but it’s worth the calm man!! I wish you luck and just know many won’t. Are dealing with over testosterones animals!!