Need some support and help in controlling

[Libby2999]

I don't want to have to go back to starving/anorexia again. My goal is 120 pounds. I got to 127 on january 23rd and just today I weighed myself and I'm at 137!! I've gained 10 pounds!! I know over that time I was eating ALL the time. Now I am going to the gym atleast twice a week. But I need help with stop eating. I eat out of bordum and I have a hard time stoping once I started. And worse, sadies is coming up so I'm stressed and eat cuz of that. I remember being 127 and I looked nice. Now 10 pounds up I've got a stomach. What do you do to help keep yourself on track? I was thinking tying a string around my finger or a bracket that will remind me to keep food in proportion.

[SLadylani]

I'm glad our comments helped give you an insight to a new perspective :) I trully have to say that is it so freeing living life just not caring about the way I look or calories or diets. I know you can get there. And those books I mentioned really gave me insight into way my eating problems might have began and what I can do about them. Keep in touch and let us know how you are doing; the good days and the bad. I would love to be here for you to help you along the way :)

Sara RN

[Libby2999]

Thank you SLadylani so much. I'm still trying to get over it. :) thanks again. I should just let it go and just let my personality be the best part of me. I stopes wearing so much makeup and now I should stop caring about eating. I natural eat healthy, I just obsesse to much. And Barb135, maybe eating small meals will help me feel more relaxed so I'm not SET to when I eat like I was doing. It'll help me not feel deprived. Thanks for both of your help, you really allowed me to see. Life isn't just about deiting. My life goal shouldn't be to weight a certain much. :) thanks so much.

[Barb135]

Can you eat smaller, more frequent meals?  That works for some, because you keep your blood sugar steady all the time, which doesn't make you crave food.  

Also be conscious of WHAT you are eating.  Stick with fruits, veggies, etc.

You can also try journaling.  

[SLadylani]

Hi, I'm Sara and I'm a recovering anorexic, times one year now. I know exactly what you are talking about. After I went through a year long treatment process for anorexia, I couldn't stop eating afterward. I reached my goal weight but kept on going! I couldn't stop despite my efforts! I felt horrible and so bad about myself as I was anorexic my whole life and could no longer have "self control." I would eat mainly at night and would binge. I did go throgh a short period of time in my anorexic days when I was bulimic as well. I would eat large amounts of food and through it up. That was complete misery for me. What worked for me was first of all, stop trying to control my weight. The less I stressed about it and the less I tried to diet, the more I didn't care about food or my wieght, therefore the less obsessed with food I became, I am also a recovering drug addict, over 4 years now, and am dedicated to the Narcotics Anonymous program and 12 steps. Not a lot of people know this, but this program is not just about drugs, it's about the disease of addiction. This is what I have. I eventually started working the 12 steps around food and my addiction torwards it. The 12 steps have saved my life before. There are other programs, like OA-Overeaters Anonymous, or EDA-Eating disorders anonymous, that are 12 step based. But the gist of it really was that I had to let go of trying to control food and my weight. I had to surrender that I was powerless over food and over my addiction to it, or lack of it. This has been proven to me throughout my life. I can't eat healthfully by doing it my way. Once I did this it was so weird. About 6 months later I just notice that I no longer cared about the way I looked. In fact, I loved my body. I also got back to my goal weight without even trying. Today, I don;t try to change the way I look anymore, because it's not important to me. I care about other things today like my life goals and helping others. I also realized that I was eating what would be called "normal.." I was eating what I wanted when I wanted and was not thinking about how many calories it would have, etc, etc. In fact, I actually enjoyed food and liked my relationship with it! I hadn't binged or night eaten in about 6 months, since I got through the 1st 3 steps. Trully a miracle as nearly my whole life I have been obsessed about food or my looks in some way. So my suggestion to you is let go of trying to control, and surrender. Just stop caring and see what happens. What have you got to loose? Why not try it? Possibly research support groups in your area like OA, EDA, or others. Get a good support group of friends and have them help you by asking them to come over for meals, or going out to eat with them. Find a hobby and try and stay busy, or more importantly, out of the house where you don't have access to unlimited food. Try going to a bookstore or looking on line for some books you can read. "When Food is Love" is a good book. "Anorexicia Nervosa and Associated Disorders" is also a great read. Just keep trying new things, especially changeing your perspective, and don't give up. Journaling right after you finish eating instead of eating more also helps. Also, journaling before you eat about what you plan to eat, and about how you're feel;ing about the meal can help so after you're done eating, you can go back and read it and see if you met your goals. Sorry for the long post, I had a lot of suggestions :) I trully wish you the best of luck and wishes, and know this website is always here if you need support!

Sara RN