Need opinion about virginity

[yourcuteness]

Ok, this may be a silly question, but I was talking with my boyfriend about this. Well, I'm 22 and a virgin, but I've had oral sex and mutual masturbation (only recently been doing these activities). I haven't had vaginal sex though. The other night, he did slide his penis in me (with a condom on), he only got halfway in because I said it was hurting, so he stopped. He just wanted to slide in, we weren't going to have "full-on" sex that night.

He was saying that I was no longer a virgin because I had a penis inside of me, but then he retracted his comment and said that he didn't break anything because there wasn't any blood (and I know that not all people bleed their first time), but he did say I was very small, so he said I was still a virgin.

So I just wanted to know what you all think. He has asked about "sliding" into me a few times before, but I said no theo ther times. I'm so paranoid about a pregnancy. I come from a family who doesn't believe in sex before marriage, so if anything were to happen, it would be pretty bad.

I know that nothing is 100% safe other than staying abstinent. He has "potent sperm"... he got tested and instead of the average 1 million sperm, he has double. He has gotten ex-girfriends pregnant on their first time (that's without protection), since he has a latex allergy. He knows there are alternative condoms, but they're more expensive. But he did use a condom with me, despite the internal pain he experienced afterwards, but if didn't use one, I would've never let him go inside of me.

So, am I still a virgin or not??

Thanks!

[monkeyflower]

Sex isn't everything, but it is important. I cannot possibly stress enough how important it is to have a relationship with someone who has similar views of sex. If neither of you think it's important, great. But prepare yourself for a lifetime of trouble if you marry/get involved with someone who thinks it is. Desire discrepancies are the biggest problems in long-term relationships.

[monkeyflower]

Yeah. What sailors wife said.

[mrs canada]

Sorry to have to say this but this guy sounds like TROUBLE. If only you read your words from our point of view. You know, when your read between the lines of what you're writing, here's what I see you saying: "I am lonely and want to be in a relationship and this guy is giving me attention" "I have convinced myself I want to have sex because I feel this is what I need to do to keep him interested in me" "He's done a lot of things that I don't approve of but I will accept it all because he wants to be my boyfriend."

HE IS TROUBLE. Go back to "phone dating" him if you must remain attached, but find yourself someone who is a responsible and respectable person, not just a horny dog.

[lucylocket2]

just read the above and help me, i have to get ready for bed. If anybody else can finish what i am trying to say, please do. My head hurts!

[yourcuteness]

I'm hearing what you're all saying, but you just don't know the whole story. It'll take too long to type on here lol. But I respect all your comments, and maybe some of them are somewhat true.

Like I said, I know my boundaries and I'm not rushing into anything. And he may be just another horny guy, but if we're not alone (which we're usually not), he won't act upon it. And if we were alone, I have pushed him away or told him that I wanted to stop, and he did.

[yourcuteness]

My boyfriend is 23 and the other 2 pregnacies were with girlfriends of over 1 year, so they weren't one night stands. I don't have any income of my own, I go to school full time and I live at home. And it is partly a religious thing about the pill. I do care how my parents think of me since they've supported me in getting my degree and continuing my education right now and everything else in my life. It's just complicated with the parents that I have, they're just really over protective and I can't just cut ties like that. That's just disrespectful. Again, it's a cultural thing. I mean I love them, but it's just hard (hence the situtation in my relationship with my bf). But I am confused a little, and that's why I'm not rushing into anything. I mean what I did with him, doesn't make me want to do it all the time. Not that I didn't enjoy it, but I know I'm not ready to go all the way... not only with him, but with any other guy (not saying that I want to be with other guys).