Crack

[Alyssa]

My husband uses crack. He also drinks frequently and smokes marijuana (daily). He has been using crack for about two years. He has admitted he has a problem. But he soesn't stop using. He's gone for a month and then went back. We seperated over his addiction(s) and he seemed to be getting better after getting much worse. So we are back together now since Spetember and he was using about once a month. Now it's every time he has the money to do it.

He says he wants to quit and that he has no controlover himself. I thought that admitting you have a problemis the first step to recovery? He doesn't do anything to help himself stop. His latest idea as to how he is going to quit is he's not going to work. So if he has no money then he has no access to the drug. Can this approach work, if he is sincere in his desire to stop? Or is it a way of manipulating me so he can continue but also keep his family?

And once they stop, like for years, I understand they may still get the cravings for it. So does it ever end? Can someone really get off of it forever?

[crashdummy]

I am married and my husband is a crack head. We have been together 11 years and married for 6 years. He has been smoking crack for over 20 years.  We have been around and around with his habit.  I had him court ordered for treatment, but he is currently in jail.  We have done the jail thing the whole time we have been together. I have been lied to, cheated on, and of course he stole from me.  Now he wants me to bail him out after he left me one night to go be with his crack prostitute. I can relate to some of the comments that were posted.  You name it I have been there.  I just feel so dumb cause I want to give up but something wont let me.  The thing that hurt the most is the disrespect that I had to indure.  I have done everything known to help this man.  Now I need help.

[freedomseeker]

wow..your post hit home..HARD!! i have decided today to STOP living his life of addiction..i cannot save him anymore and i need to work on myself. i lost all self esteem and confidence from my situation. i need to free myself from this marriage. so i have decided to start going to nar-anon meetings and get some support...

[melacholy]

Thank you so much.  I will do that.  I will let you know what happens.  Do pray  for my family and GOD bless you for your time.

[girlybuff]

It will help you know that you aren't alone.  It will help you understnad the disease more.  It will help you have a life even if those around you are using.  It will help you to detach so that their moods don't become your moods, so that you can stop trying to fix something you have no power to fix and so you can start living your life for oyu rather than living your life for the addict.
I will pray for you.......
Google al a non and find a meeting in your area.  You don't have to speak if you don't want to.  Go and listen.  It's worth a shot.  It's a fmaily disease and everyone in the addict's life is affected one way or another.    

[melacholy]

Thank you for your help.  So AL A NON can help me with drug addiction in my family?  I said I never wanted to be like my mother and fight it everyday.  I could not help her.  It is great to know that I am not alone

[girlybuff]

PLEASE try and attend an AL A NON meeting.  You can learn how to detach with love and live your life DESPITE what the addict (s) in your life are doing and despite whether they are active or not.  Stopping the physical use of a drug or alcohol is only the first part of recovery, the next part, the part that KEEPS someone sober not just clean is the part that is the hardest and the part that takes the most amount of physical and emotional energy.  That comes after the physical usage stops and since it's a family disease, if one gets better, you haev a better chance of others getting better as well.  If for nothing else, AL A NON can help you come to terms with the disease, understand it better and connect with parents and wives of addicts so you know that you're not alone.....
As an addict/alcoholic, daughter of an addict/alcoholic and wife of one, I know that it saved me.  I go to BOTH AA and AL A NON.  Now, I know that their problems are not and do not have to be MINE.  I have my own issues to deal with.