Painkiller addiction...

[bforns]

I am 23 years old, single male, and have been using pain killers, vicodin for over 2 years now, I am not prescribed to the meds. I purchase these and it has gotten me into financial troubles and is just a horrible addiction that i need to break. I have decided to stop using as of TODAY, cold turkey, I know this will be a hard experience and I hope that I dont relapse.. When i dont have the drug, it is ALL that I think about, i cant believe that i can sit here and say that at times in my life, or actually all the time when im not on the meds that A PILL IS ALL I THINK ABOUT. I wish i would have never been introduced to this drug, my drug of choice. I don't feel NORMAL when i am not on this medication, I goto school full-time (online) and work part time, this has been affecting my job and school in more ways than one, also i am about to be evicted from my apartment, I just want to stop this addiction, I know that i keep babling and I hope that someone, anyone who has the same prob. or similar will keep in touch with me at ***@**** and talk, I need support, i would like to share my experiences with someone, I know i have to keep myself busy in order to not think about this drug.... I need help to say the least and am not ashamed to admit it, I have told people in my life, that care about me ( i guess not enouph) to help my quit, i have no insurance and cannot afford drug counseling or anything to that effect...

[mduran2020]

hey guys and gals my name is mike and i too went through absolutly everything imaginable just like all of us here i took pills for about 4 years straight and when i say that i mean pretty much everyday and if i didnt for a day or 2 believe me it wasnt by choice i also have a family and it also ruined my relationship with my future wife because we were both addicts we took anything from perks,vics,to oxos, matter of fact she is in prison now because of it we were unbelievable to get want we wanted the only difference was i had way more self control than she did but that defienitely didnt make it any better for me as i too was a monster i tried ct but come on lets be honest to ourselves that just doesnt work for all of us maybe less than 3 percent of us and the sad thing is alot of people dont understand that because they dont go through the things we do which leads to alot of people being judgemenatal... well the secret too this has got to be Suboxone it truely is an amazing drug but yes it still has a high rate for dependabilty but is nothing i mean nothing like going through what we are putting ourselves through i have been on this medication for bout 8 months now and yeah its expensive and its a hassle findind docs at time but let me just say WOW what a difference this has made in my life my life i feel in control for the first time in like forever and withdrawls are nothing like takeing pills actually ive gone several days without my meds due to money problems but i dont withdrawl to be very honest and i pretty much have reduced my dose in half from when i first started on this it truely has changed my life i mean of course we all have our ways of dealing with things but my advice to everyone  is to at least knowledge yourself on this stuff you never know it could be exactly what you may have been praying for this maybe the anwser for you it was for me i cant imagine what my life would be like now if i had never taken a chance with this(at my rate probably jail or worse maybenot be able to type this) and believe me i thought about it for months untill i took that chance im so glad i did i mean look its very expensive only certain docs prescibe it supossedly has a high risk for dependency and i know that it may not be for everyone thats some of the reasons i kept putting it off and i did struggle getting started but when you want something that bad you will stop at nothing to get it (spoken like a true addict lol)really though i could probably write about 10 books over the course of my experiences as a life of an addict (I may wanna learn how to spell first lol) as for my wife well i started getting clean right as she was taken away to prison i felt really bad for her cause she had to ct without any options but god works in mysterious ways i guess glad to report she is doing great bout 9-10 months later and she has really found god through all of this as we write back and forth to one another of course i know she is much better off than i am now cause like i said she ct and its been like 10 months now well i guess thats also a matter of opinion aswell cause i feel pretty damn good about where im at in life aswell she should be paroled by may 2010 and im really looking foward to that i really dont know what our future is but i guess will just leave that up to the lord well thanks for listening everyone and yes there is light at the end of the tunnel and its good and bright too as always god bless you

[worried878]

Just read your post and hope you are doing well...keep postinig...lots of support here

WELCOME

[K Todd]

Your at the right place brother!

I myself have c/t 7.5 hydro's at 9 x daily. I know exacty how you feel in not being able to function normal without them...it's like all the rest of us in here, same boat.

Today is day 5....You well go thru a few days of hell, but if you can keep your mind on the days to come, thru your worst w/d's...it will help so much.

It is worth suffering for 3-5 days...and then it starts to turn around, and you will start to see the light...keep posting, and expect the worst case of the flu you ever had.

God Bless,
Todd

[toxictome]

Welcome to the forum. There is a lot of help and support here. You can ct(cold trukey ) or taper. If you can't stick to a schedule...and you don't have anyone to hold the pills and give them out as scheduled...you  will probably have to go ct. It's not easy..but you can do it. If you ct you will proba bly need a week off work ....you can always say you have the flu because that's what wd symptoms mimic.

Good luck and keep posting!!!

[persnick38]

There are lots of people here who will support you through this. I am on day 17 with no vicodin. I won't lie - it hasn't been easy but you need to know that it IS possible. Many, many people have done it before us.
You can do this and any of us here will help however we can. Post whenever you need to. It really does help.

[corey411]

Welcome to the forum. I'm just a week new here also wd from Vics. I went ct and day 4 was the day I began to feel better. Some people don't till day 5 or 6 but 4-5 seems to be the norm. Read about Thomas Recipe and PAWS under the health topcs button at the right top side of the page. I relapsed on day 6 despite feeling so much better and all I went through. If you can google and find an NA/AA meeting in your area. They are free and all you have to do is show up. This will help prevent what I'm going through...relapsing. Also keep posting. Best of Luck, Corey

[troubleinohio]

to answer your question- no i didnt wean off, i couldnt. I tried to taper but it was impossible for me. If I had pills in the house, i gobbled them all up as fast as i could with no control. I had to just go Cold TUrkey (CT). So i went from 10 VIcs a day to zero. There is no secret to my "success" and it will always be a lifelong battle to stay clean but I just got to the point that i was sick and tired of living the way i was. so tired of my life revolving around getting pills, counting pills, figuring out how long that batch would last me before i had to try and find more, making panicked phoen calls to anyone who might have some, asking doctors for early refills....got sick of it. Not to mention when you are like that, you arent exactly the ideal parent. I have two little boys. I couldnt do that to them anymore. they deserve a mom who isnt popping pills like skittles. So i suffered out the WD's this last time without relapsing finally and have been doing really good ever since  

[bforns]

I am also afraid that my work and school with interfere with my cold-turkey stop of this drug. When I dont have the drug all I want to do is SLEEP, I will take muscle relaxers and sleep aids to help me sleep, I will work but will not do any school work or anything, I dont know how I will function normally without this drug, that I am so addicted to.

[bforns]

My use varies or varied, it all depended on how many pills I could buy and what people had or have available, Like yesterday I took 8 vicodin 10/500mg. I was planning on using those pills and take 1 a day to lean myself off of them, but couldn't handle it, I had to indulge and take them all. I hope that this plan works for  me (I call it a plan, lol) , I am glad that there are already posts to this forum. If i could ask a question to troubleohio, How did you manage to quit successfully? Did you lean yourself off? Its nice hearing story's about how people quit and any suggestions would really help.. thanks 4 the support.

[troubleinohio]

Glad you found this forum! You will find so much support and great advice and make friends here that understand exactly what youre going through, and what youve been through already. (boy hows that for a run on sentence, lol). Anyhow welcome aboard. The short story of me is, I was on vicodin too for a couple years. Tried to quit a few times, lots of relapses and now Im nearing 90 days clean (if i havent hit that already, I dont know, i lost count a long time ago). You can do this! if i quit the pills anyone can do it! I was really bad off and didnt think Id ever be able to function without them! I was wrong!  

[allaboutmary]

Hey , you are not alone.  There are hundreds of us here on the forum that can relate. Congrat's on making the decision to get clean.  How much were you taking per day ?  This forum has helped so many people get clean. Keep reading and posting. We will help you through this.  Hugs,   Mary