Taper or cold turkey

[Nursey7]

I have been taking hydrocodone 7.5/500 for about 7 years after a major surgery and fibromyalgia. I want off this crap. I have to take way too many to feel good; it's miserable!!  1 have 15 pills left and am going on vacation in 2 weeks. I want to be off these and feeling better by then. I am on second day cold turkey and I have not slept, constant headache, severe muscle pain, resless legs, irritable, gi symptoms, crying constantly. I don't know if I should use these last 15 or continue cold turkey. Unless I take all of them at once they won't get me high. I have such a tolerance now it's terrible. I don't feel life is worth living right now and I hate that feeling. I am not one that would ever harm myself just feel awful. Help please!!!

[Nursey7]

Day from you know where!! This anxiety, agitation and sweating is killing me!!! I honestly don't know if I can do this!!  I am not sure to thank-you or scream at you for telling me to flush those pills!! :-(

[48Candles]

You are doing great and it is very hard but you did the right thing and when you look back you will be thankful for doing that.  Keep your mind busy with good things and just take one day at a time. I to am going off this crap I am a week in to it but i am weening down i cut 2 pills a day for a week so far like everyone says day 3-4 was my worse today i am feeling better gonna cut another one which will be three a day. I took as bottle said did not take extra but wanted to, so maybe that makes it a little easier for me .But i am getting off all to as soon as posiable i have a bad back and lot's of other things wrong but i think i can live a good life without and just have to learn i can not do it all. i tested dirty for my drug test so i go back this week for my whopping and i think he will cut me off so that is why i cut back to make it easier. I never had a contract or drug test before so it was a shock to me this time. I do not know how that happened but i was lucky for over 6 years so i knew it was coming some day. I smoke pot for relief and that is what i tested dirty for. I guess i will see what he does i think he will cut me off but i am hoping he weens me but i am ready for the worse. Will keep posting and this is a great site with many good people with great advice and has helped me so much so thanks to everyone for all your help. Keep up the good work Nursey7 you can do this!

[Nursey7]

Day 4 and I am just so tired!  I feel like I am in a fog. I have got to go to work and I am so anxious; I don't know what to do. I do normally take Ativan as needed.  I don't have any and am waiting for it to get filled. Is this okay to take. It has never done anything for me as far as getting high. I know there are a lot of people that love benzos.  I have been prescribed them all and never felt anything other than it helped with the heart palpitations and other physical anxiety symptoms. What's really sad is I want hydrocodone so bad right now and it was making me feel like crap for so long. It would make me tired, sweat and itch like crazy-WTH???  I just had to take so many to feel good I guess. I just gotta make it through this day!!!

[Crazy_in_the_head]

Dear Nursey7,

We could be twins!  Except you have enough money and PTO to vacation and I don't.

I also have constant Fibro pain, TMJ, Migraines, and eventually I will need a new knee from when I was obese due to my sugar addiction.  I honestly don't know how I can live the rest of my life like this, or honestly, if I even want to. So I'm going to do what people much smarter than me tell me to; take it one day at a time.  For today, I can do this!

I'm only on day 6 but day 3 and 4 were killers.  I called in sick all of last week.  I told them I had the Black Plague.  I'm going to take sh** tomorrow, but as Bette Midler says, "F*** 'em if they can't take a joke!"

At first I told my husband and my adult son that I had the Flu.  Then I wanted to go to an NA meeting on Friday, and I told them I didn't want to take narcotics for this miserable pain, and I needed help learning to live a different way.  Guess what?  Son told me where there was a good meeting, (he went to drug ct in High School) and husband didn't flinch. If you look at some of my earlier post, I talked about how everybody knows your secret anyway.  You really aren't fooling anyone.  

You are halfway thru hell.  Don't turn back.  Go to a meeting.  You are a smart woman, and you know what to do.  You can't be a good wife or more importantly a good mother when you use drugs.  You know this.

I put my last 15 mg in my medical waste jug where I put my syringes from my injections for migraines meds and vit B-12.  It's really nasty, full of mold and almost full.  Don't think my inner drug addict hasn't considered shaking them out to see how bad they really are!  

I just took some Advil (like a normal human being.)  I'm praying for at least some relief.  I'm going to eat some protein, and go to a meeting and find a sponsor.

I really hope you stick to it, and stick around.  I look forward to hearing your updates.

(((Hugs)))

[kyle505]

First of all, day 3 was the hardest for me. What you're feeling is normal; and the mental game has kicked in big time, that's why you're thinking about the pills you flushed. If you hadn't you would have relapsed already. Get through today...If you can take tomorrow off, do so. If not, just tell whomever that you've got a mild flu. Now, for most of us, day 5 is usually the turning point, so you're almost there.  Remember to eat lots of healthy food; if you can't eat try drinking Ensure. If you're visiting the bathroom a lot, find a drink with electrolytes added. No matter, it's very important that you keep your body fueled, even if you don't feel like it.
I know exactly what you're thinking and feeling...On day three I was looking for a zipper so I could unzip and step out of my own skin. And I too was posting on this forum, but kept thinking - yeah, it's easy for them to tell me to do this and wait for that - I'm going through hell and they are sipping tea and typing on their computer. Something like that. You are just about done with the hardest day of detox. Don't give in to the voice. Remember, count the minutes, count the hours. Whatever it takes to get you through.
Keep posting. I'll be checking in, as will many others who are here to help and support you. I don't use this phrase much, but you really CAN do this.