Tapering off.....not a choice

[Kuckma]

Hello everyone,

not sure u remember me....

I was convinced I could taper off just like that....
coming to find out, its not that easy!
Not sure if I can get it done, here I am faced with another refill!!!
The taper off is just not for someone like me, to be honest, coming to find out (and I am so shocked about this)
I am too hooked.

Hubby was gonna help me on this, but all it did is challenge our relationship. The last two weeks have been so tough on us. As of right now we are not even talking to each other, cause I tested his patience one time too much. I have been a real b****!
I have to do it cold turkey. Just not quiet ready for it yet. guess as long as I put it off the harder it will get.
I have been thinking different about the pills I take, there not 'my friend' anymore.

Just wanted to let you guys know 'where' I am in my quest. I'm frustrated and it is almost Christmas, don't feel very Christmassy.

[atthebeach]

if you take clonazepam it will lengthen the withdrawl. is it a narcotic. don't take it.
pray,pray,pray and pray some more. the Lord will see you through this. your kids will think you are sick for christmas it is fine. have your husband wrap your gifts. so what if you have to eat chinese food, they can sing fa,ra,ra,ra,ra to you. try to relax as much as you can. you can do it. be strong.
sending blessings
debbie

[Back2Me]

You are going to have to be a little selfish about this is you have to. I mean what's more important, ONE perfect christmas day or the other 364 days of the year, and the rest of your life and the dozens of Christmases to come. Besides really in a day or two I almost guarantee you will be ok to get up and do things. Even if it comes in spurts. Ask for help if you can. I would take the clonopin, I did. It helps until it wears off. Emotions are going to be crazy for a while it's normal. Just a day or two. Drink and eat if you can. Protien shakes are good. And immodium. Almost done.

[Kuckma]

wanted to make an appointment with my dr, to help me with me withdraw....
no appointments till tue
I am the worst today, cant walk, paralyzed in my bed crying.
How did I let this happen?
Does anyone know Clonazepam, I got this medication from my Rheumatologist. thought it might help with the anxiety. any idea if it will I am willing to do ANYTHING right now to make it stop, be able to get up and get ready for Christmas.
Christmas is a joke and hassle for me right now!
this is guna be the worst Christmas ever, did not finish making cookies. the presents are not wrapped, the Christmas grocery list is laying on the counter for days.
Dear God, what the **** am I guna do?

[Back2Me]

Only another day or 2 to go before the worse is over. You can at least see the finish line now just keep going almost there.

[WantToBeNormalAgain]

Well it won't help your anxiety to have someone blaming you. Just tell him hey, it happened, it happens all the time with people getting addicted. It usually doesn't happen with people trying to quit, especially CT, and the whole point is, is that you've been clean 3 days now!!! You should be over the physical stuff very soon...perhaps some throwing up and diarrhea is due to anxiety...?
Things won't get better overnight. Anxiety is still here for me although in spouts instead of constant. There will be happy days again. Just not right away, because like you said, you're mourning the loss of what gave you comfort. You're being too hard on yourself and putting your expectations way too high this early in withdrawals. Just keep telling yourself it is going to get better. And if your husband is blaming you, like I said, it's not going to help the emotional side of things and maybe make some physical symptoms worse...
Take deep breaths. Take a hot shower. Stop feeling so guilty, and try and get to the root of why you were taking the pills in the first place (not the pain, but the emotional reasons you were taking them) and try to get some help for that set up. Therapy, this forum. Just keep talking. Your husband doesn't know what you're going through because he's not an addict..do you know just how a man thinks or feels? No, because you're not one!! Maybe put it to him that simple. And just know that the physical stuff, even though it doesn't seem like it right now, will get better every hour, day, etc. It's a moment at a time.
I've been told here so many times and read to tell yourself you're sober for today. It stinks and it's so very very hard, but you're doing it!!!!!!!!!  I believe in you. You're strong and you can do this..xo

[worried878]

Dont beat yourself up..tapering is hard for an addict.  The pills control an addict vs the addict controlling the pills as a rule.  It is hard to control a taper, when you have lost control of the substance...it just is!  I couldnt do it either.  Sometimes I would try and taper and take even more out of the anxiety of trying to taper!
One major thing I found was to make a plan, pick a quit day and stick to it.  The plan has to include cutting off supply whether is be a dealer, friends or a doctor.  Most doctors are happy to hear you no longer want to take narcotics.  They will not look down upon u.

Merry Christmas to u!  Quitting sounds like a great new year's resolution!