I feel so numb sometimes that i cant have a emotion and i feel like killing myself but cannot cry. Does anyone else get like this where they find they cant? I think sub consciously its me thinking if i start crying i can no longer be in denial that im in pain so my body just doesnt do it sort of thing. Gah i hope this makes sense to someone
Yes it does to me and though the cause of it may be a bit different (and still under study) when depression is at extreme people can feel incapable of any action or many normal feelings at all but as things improve a bit and people have the ability to act at all they can become suicidal and that is the time of most concern. If you feel that way its best to speak to a psychiatrist immediately and if you feel in any way you would act on those thoughts go to a hospital where you would be safe. I would say it would be best to speak to your psychiatrist about having things adjusted so that you don't experience this state to begin with.
Ive acted on those thoughts twice before, when i was bleeding out on the carpet close to death there was no help there. Sorry to be graphic about it but i live in britain we cant just see psychaitrists they said they would put me through to one and ive seen one once in 2 years they dont care here on the NHS.
For me its when i cant have a emotion or move that i feel im a my worst not when im feeling suicidal or crying because im always mixed when that happens and can do other things gah
They do care here on the NHS! If you were bleeding out on the carpet was an ambulance called? Were you admitted to hospital? If you had been then you would have automatically been seen by a psychiatrist while on the ward. If you did not seek help then they wouldn't be aware.
I know you've had some bad experiences so far but it's sad to see that you have lost all confidence in the system. The NHS does a lot of good for a lot of people, yes I know that the wait can be longer than we'd like but once you are referred and as long as you work with your psych then the support is there.
I can only say what i've said before and that is, see a different doctor if you are not getting any further forward with your current one.
I have been there and am there now. I have had two back to back admissions in the last six weeks for suicidal thoughts and one for a suicide attempt. I have been in a major depression since the fall. Only now am I able to cry. Now I cry all the time. I still think about death much of the time but I am seeing my therapist once to twice a weeks to keep this in track.
I would suggest that if you are having suicidal feeling you talk to you Dr. immediately.
yes i feel detached a lot of the time. as bulldozer said maybe you should try and get new pdoc and get the help you need. i assume that in britain if you present yourself at casualty you will get a psych evaluation and get meds sorted out for you.
i hope you are feeling a little better, this is a hard road to travel.
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