This forum seems to go in phases.
The general tone recently has been rather "down". Partly I suspect do to the time of the year.
I'm going to share my recent experience to balance things out a bit.
The past two weeks have been the best two I've had in years..I finally have seen, and touched, the light at the end of my tunnel.. I feel lighter and happier..my mood has swung to good. I have enjoyed things and am looking forward to things. This, I realise now, was lost months and months before my eventual breakdown. It really feels as though a switch has been clicked somewhere.
In reality it is probably the eventual response to much psychiatric input, my therapy and my meds. and time passing. I opened my mind to it all, read what I could, applied the techniques everyone taught me, their patience endured and I was a slow learner but now I have learnt. This week I feel strong and capable and I dare to hope this will last.
I'm not posting this to rub anyone's face in it.
I just want everyone to realise that blackness doesn't have to be forever.
Keep striving...we're all on similar journies and we all need to focus on the destination as well as the intermediate bits.
I hope this helps folks.