Who have similar symptom or experience?

[MR_WHY]

I describe my worst depression feature as: "black cloud that surround my head, skull, and me and around me. I feel it literally that really surround me. It associate with all negative issues, ideas, feeling, worried, fears, sadness, every negative things"

Any one have similar experience? Especially, in term "black cloud"?

[MR_WHY]

It's help that I'm not the only one who feel something like black cloud.

I have really difficult to explain my depression or found words that explains exactly what I feel. Even when I meet my psychiatrist I have many difficulties to explain what I feel or answer his questions.

[MR_WHY]

Thanks for all your responses.
I think all solutions suggested above not work for me especially without meds work. Do u agree?
I tried the whole things above before my diagnosis or during my treatment but not help.
I try to do meditation but I fail because I can't clear my mind and stop thinking,
Any advice?

[weaver71]

When I am stuck in the black cloud with a bankrupt heart, I meditate a lot. I try to remember anything that inspired me in the past. Though I can't feel it, I can remember how I have felt before. Last time was a long one, but I remembered my feelings about sustainable living, organic gardens, alternative energy, and bioregional calitalism. I committed to doing at least part of one thing each day related to those inspired ideas, again, I didn't feel it, I just did it anyway. Over time, a friend said, "I love that you don't lose hope, even though the world is falling apart." I did lose hope, so that struck me, even my old inspiration that left my heart, still inspires people, even if I don't feel it. More time passed, about a year, and I started to feel inspired again. I found that DOING THINGS I believe in, or even used to believe in, helps those old feelings return. It's like a sport. It hurts to practice, don't always want to, but with perseverance, one eventually plays that game that reminds one of the whole reason they put in all that work. Sometimes it takes awhile for the feelings to catch up with the living, but I believe they always do. So, what inspires, or used to inspire you? I suggest spending some meditation time on that. Then DO something related to it. That has helped me anyway. As I have felt inspired, I added to it, slowly. I still cycle, but somehow I keep my perspective, I can remember that all feelings and situations pass, good or bad. My cloud had blocked my vision of the balance, but my actions have produced fruit that have helped me see it, even when I don't feel it. Mental elasticity is a major tool for me, as I can't afford to be trapped in any mood or thought. Hang in there, we can recover.

[Bubulous]

The black cloud analogy works but I will give you a different one to think about.
Your heart is like an energy bank.  It stores the energy that we put into it be it mental, physical, or spiritual.  Depression, in sense, is like an overdraft at the heart bank.  In order to come out of depression we must work on one, two or all of these:
Mental:
Start telling yourself positive affirmation even if you don't feel that way.  Start reading up on depression and gather tools to fight.
Physical:
We have already talked about how physical activity can help with depression expecially exercise or anything that gets the heart pumping.  When we ake the heart pump faster, as it slows down, it stores energy.
Spiritual:
Praying definitely helps.  Turning over our worries to a being, god, or loved one makes it easier to carry our load.  You believe in me and the things that I tell you and i am just human like you.  If you can believe that there is an energy that makes me come on here and help then you can start to see that you possess this energy too.

[MR_WHY]

What's should I do now practically? My next step?

[releasetrauma]

I have experienced these feelings frequently throughout my life.  It is very familiar to me.  Though I must say, I no longer experience it anymore.  I suppose you could say, I've healed from these dark inner feelings. These emotions have a cause, they originate from childhood.  Energy healing is a terrific way to transform these feelings into self love, self esteem , self confidence.  The dark cloud can be healed ...