4th stage renal failure in my dog - Dogs

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4th stage renal failure in my dog

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tonyb286

Sep 17, 2012

To: timber9999

Hi. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I know you may feel guilty (without any actual reason for feeling this way), and you will certainly feel dreadfully sad, and be second-guessing everything and questioning everything. This is all very natural and something many of us doggy folk go through when we lose our best friends. Please know that you did the right thing - the kindest and most humane thing - and you did it out of love. Timber was a good age at 16.5yrs, and Im sure he lived that long largely thanks to your kindness and attentiveness. If Timber could say it, he would thank you for preventing him from suffering any more - and he would thank you for all the wonderful years full of love and comfort that you provided.

It is so hard to get through each day without our best friends. We remember them, and it hurts. We see their toys, food bowl and leads, and it hurts. But as each day passes, it gets a little easier - so be strong, and remember the good times you shared. My heart goes out to you. Tony x

timber9999

Sep 18, 2012

To: tonyb286

thanks Tony and thanks Cholismom, this is actually Timbers dad. all your words of support are much appreciated.

TwoBitsMom

Sep 18, 2012

To: timber9999

To Timber's Dad,
I am so sorry to hear about Timber, Please accept my heartfelt sympathy.
I know only to well the feeling of loss that you are experiencing. It has been a year since I had TwoBits euthanized, and I still grieve for her, and miss her more than words can express.
Your story reminds me so much of my last few days with Twobits.
Like you, I second guess all the things I did. I can tell you, it is something we all do. We always wonder if things would have been better, if we would have done something different. I wish I could tell you something that would comfort you during this difficult time, but, having been there myself, I know that there is nothing I can say, that can erase the pain and emptiness you are feeling. Again, I am so very sorry for your loss.
Please feel free to express yourself here, it does help to know that there are people who truly do understand how much you love Timber, and how much you are missing him.

God Bless Timber's Beautiful Spirit and Soul. He is much loved.
My thoughts and prayers are with you,
Connie

timber9999

Sep 18, 2012

To: TwoBitsMom

thanks
well its now four days and no timber when i get home from work. no timber waiting for me at my pillow. weird, i never thought i would miss cleaning up after him, and him waking me up at 4 am to go for a walk.
The feeling of guilt is overbearing. ugh, the next time i hear someone say its only a dog/animal................grrrrrr
thanks for everyones kind words of support....

TwoBitsMom

Sep 19, 2012

To: timber9999

Hi Timber's Dad,
Yes, the house just isn't the same without them, and neither are we.
It is amazing how big of a difference a dog makes in our lives. The void they make when they are gone is unbearable at times.
I feel sorry for the people in this world who say "It is only a dog." They have obviously never experienced the connection or the love and companionship that our dogs have shared with us. The people who say, "It's only a dog." just don't get it, so ignore those comments.....those guys just don't know what they are talking about..!
Timber is part of your family, you love him as much or more than any of the humans in your life, in fact, Timber has probably been with you longer than most of the people in your life have. Sixteen and a half years...Wow, you were both so lucky to share that much time with each other.
I do understand the feeling of guilt you have. I have it too, guilt is a difficult burden to bear when you are also grieving. Others will say there is nothing to feel guilty about, and perhaps there isn't, but it does not change the fact that I still do. The guilt is something we just have to work out on our own.
It is nice to hear others say you have nothing to feel guilty about....it does help for a little while, but the truth is, we have to convince ourselves, and it does take time. So, give it time...things will get better for you.
Someone else posted a comment about euthanasia that sticks in my head.
They said, "Euthanasia is not something we do to our dogs, it is something we do for them."
I think of that comment often. It reminds me that maybe the only thing I am guilty of is True love.

Connie

mypoppy

Sep 29, 2012

To: TwoBitsMom

hi, we lost our little sweetheart Poppy whom was a Tibetan Terrier crossed with a Poodle yesterday to renal failure, we are heart broken, she was 16 and we have had her for 15 years, she was a rescue dog and very dearly loved, we spoiled her often, she had a large basket of toys, the best food, lots of love etc, words cannot express how lost we feel without her, it is very painful, cannot stop crying, it happened so quickly, she kept collapsing, took her to the vets and she was put on a drip, she seemed to recover but 1 month later within 4 days she stopped eating, drank gallons of water, could not walk, we cuddled her often, we had a vets appointment for the friday but on the friday morning she sadly passed away, keep seeing her image everywhere, the house seems so empty without her, i am crying whilst writing this...but the words people have written on this forum are very helpful...RIP my little baby...xxxxxxxxx

TwoBitsMom

Sep 30, 2012

To: mypoppy

Hi..
I am so very sorry to hear about Poppy. Please accept my heartfelt sympathy.
I know how sad and lost you are feeling without her. We love our dogs so much, they are part of our family, they are our children. There really are no words that can express how we feel when they are gone. Tears are unspoken words from the heart, and Poppy was loved beyond words.

Wasn't it wonderful that the two of you were able to spend 15 years together?
The fact that she lived to be 16 years old, is in part, due to the wonderful care you gave her. Just think of how much both of your lives changed, the day you rescued her. You were so lucky to find each other.

Like so many others on this forum, I do understand your loss. I have been there, and I am still there. It has been a very long year without my Twobits.
Our lives will never be the same without them, but things will, and do get better, so hang in there...

God Bless Poppy's Beautiful Spirit and Soul....she is much loved. Amen.

A big cyber hug to you.

Connie

jen1355

Oct 12, 2012

To: This community and about my lab

Hello, on Monday Oct 8, my 10 year old Lab, Frank went to the vet because he had stopped eating. Long story short, after 2 days at the vet and another 2 days at the Emergency Clinic he was diagnosed with Stage 4 Kidney disease. His liver is also diseased. We brought him home yesterday afternoon. I have been reading all the posts on this forum and it has helped me very much. Frank is a beautiful soul and it breaks my heart to see him this way. I appreciate all the comments I have read thus far. Just wanted everyone to know that I am making this journey as well. I have never lost a dog to disease before. I am still in shock. I appreciate your prayers as Frank and I travel these last days together.

Thank you for reading this.

Judy

Cholismom

Oct 13, 2012

To: jen1355

Hi Judy,

You've found the right place.  I am so sorry that you are on this journey.  It is a hard path to walk; one that everyone in this community has traveled. But you do not walk alone.

As I read your post the tears welled up in my eyes.  I am so deeply sorry that you have to go through this.

When I lost my doxie this summer this community gave me great solace.  I n the middle of the night I would read the posts that others left for me.  I am thankful for everyone of them.  I'm thankful that you found this community.

The next few days will be difficult.  I will keep you and Frank in my daily thoughts and pray for the best.

God Bless,  Silvia

chaby88

Oct 18, 2012

I also lost my sweet sweet Casey to kidney failure on Monday Oct 15. She was almost 9 years old. Today is the first day I have not cried. I feel so bad. I thought my dog was perfectly healthy until she quit eating and began throwing up yellow bile on Saturday. I thought it was just an upset stomach. She stopped throwing up on Sunday, but I could tell she still felt like crap and she would not eat or drink. So I took her to the vet on Monday, the vet thought she ate something, because I did find some plastic in her vomit, my sweet Casey still acted like a pup and would play and destroy her toys. He gave her a blood test and we went home. The vet called me on Tuesday morning as he got the results of her blood work, and told me my dog was in kidney failure, to bring her up immedialty for IV and antibiotics. My sweet Casey was on IVs for 48 hours straight to jump start the kidneys, I transferred her to the vet night hospital for night IV treatment, but I just new she was in 4th stage of kidney failure. I got a copy of her blood work and her BUN was off the chart at 248 and creatine at 20.8. After I saw these values, I felt so bad. After 48 hours of treatment my vet retested her and still awful news, he said I should consider putting her to sleep. I insisted he refer me to an internal medical vet, which he did. They performed an ultra sound and said her kidneys were so weak and small. The only think they could do was put her on dialysis for a couple of weeks, and hope for a miracle. The dialysis would have cost 8-10k. They said more then likely once they took her off dialysis she would crash. I decided I did not want her to die in a hospital in a cage so I took he home on Thursday afternoon. They gave me IV fluids for under her skin, but I could tell each hour she was fading away. On Sunday she would just try to sleep and shiver. Around 3am Monday she did the most heart breaking death crys. I preyed she that God would just take in in her sleep but he didn't. I decided Monday morning I would take her in for Euthanize that afternoon. We never made it to the vet, she died in my arms at exactly 1pm. I am just so sad with out her. I wish I would have notice the warning signs, she would get me up in the middle of the night, but I though she wanted to hunt my backyard for lizards or mice.
I am just so sad. What was the most painful on Monday, she did not recognize me, I think her mind was poisoned from the toxins. She would only lay down and close her eyes for a second on Monday then wake up all of the sudden and try to stand but she was to weak. She did not want to die. We buried her in my dad's backyard.

Cholismom

Oct 19, 2012

To: chaby88

I am so sorry for your loss.  I know the feeling all to well.

Do not blame yourself for not seeing "the signs".  Take this advise from someone who knows. My little girl was diagnosed at 5.  She lived for 6 years after that.  From the onset there were no signs. My Vet was at a seminar and as a result was honing in on it.  At her annual checkup he did a urine sample and through multiple tests  found that she had CKD.

He gave us medication which she took, then doubled the medication, then IVs.  All through this there were never any signs. NEVER.

In the end, within two weeks the disease became Violent and took her little life.

Please, please don't blame yourself.  You could not have done anything to help her along.  Remember that Casey is there with you now but now there is no pain. No shivering, nothing but happy thoughts.

Chasing squirrels, mice and the occasional rabbit that may cross your backyard.

Here is a huge hug from me.  Try to remember all the good times that you and Casey had and the ones to come once you and Casey meet at the Rainbow Bridge.

God Bless You,  Silvia

chaby88

Oct 21, 2012

To: Cholismom

Thank you for your kind words. I do still feel her presence so that comforts me.

AngieDalmationJasper

Oct 31, 2012

To: TwoBitsMom

so sorry not to reply sooner...***@****, please chat

MrTeddy

Dec 19, 2012

My 9year old yorkie has severe kidney infection. His blood work came back with a BUN of 180mg/ld and creatinine levels of 7.8mg/ld is this considered 4th stage ? he is on anti-biotics and he was eating up until two days ago along with drinking. Now we have to give him everything through the syringe. What should I feed him? How can I keep him alive longer! I read about the tums.. I will try that and I have also tried giving him flaxseed oil. Please help my baby teddy :(

joeykttn

Dec 20, 2012

Mr Teddy, you may want to consider posting a new message, as not many people continue to follow the threads with the older dates.

With that said, I have more questions, and some (hopefully helpful) advice for you.

Has he been given an IV fluids to help bring his BUN/Creatinine levels down? Many pets need IV, for possible several days, to significantly reduce these numbers. Has the vet mentioned a special low protein, low phosphorus diet (typically used for pups with kidney failure, but I'm not sure if it's helpful if there is just an infection? Has the kidney infection been confirmed (via testing)? What is your vet saying is the prognosis?

Tums are sometimes used to ease stomach discomfort caused by ulcers. I use pepcid because I don't want the additional calcium in TUMS, in my pups case.

http://dogaware.com/health/kidney.html is a great source of info & advice on kidney disease, and may help you, even if he does just have an infection, and goes back to "normal" kidney function once the infection is cleared up.
There are also groups on yahoo, K9KidneyDiet, and K9Kidneys, that I have found to be invaluable.

I had a 4 month old pup go into severe kidney failure, and he turned 6 months old yesterday. His BUN was over 130, Creatinine was over 6. We were told to euthanize, but chose to fight for him. After IV treatment, medications, supplements, & months of subcutaneous fluids, his numbers are just about normal, for now. I've seen stories of other dogs that do come back from these high numbers, with IV, medicine, etc, and live out more happy days. Every pup is different, so noone can say for sure, but have hope that this might not have to be the end for Teddy :)

Again, you may get more help if you post a new thread.

Good luck!

Jenn & TJ

Sukismum

Jan 01, 2013

I am so sorry for your baby Teddy, I noticed my beautiful lurcher Suki became more fussy with her food last week and on boxing day seemed to have trouble lapping water. Thinking that she had something wrong with her mouth we took her to the vet on 27th Dec, they took bloods and told us that she was in kidney failure, she was given IV fluids over 48hrs to flush her kidneys and bring her Bun/Creatinine levels down and we were allowed to bring her home. Though clearly not herself she did eat and drink for a couple of days, back to the vets on Monday the 31st where we were given Ranitidine Oral solution 3mls 3x daily less than 24hrs later she is just lying here, not eating taking very little fluids and has been sick twice. She can hardly walk, her back end has gone and we are having to get the vet in tomorrow. It breaks my heart, she is such a special girl who I have loved dearly and she has worshipped me I can't bear the thought of losing her but I don't want her to be in pain and fear and God this is unbearable.

tonyb286

Jan 01, 2013

To: Sukismum

My heart sank when I read your post. Your experience is so much like mine 12 months ago, when we lost our beautiful lurcher BB to kidney disease with the same extraordinary speed and devastation. As loving owners, we feel so helpless, but the truth is, when things get really bad, we can do one final kindness to help our best friends ... even though the act itself breaks our hearts. Be strong for your girl. Come back and talk here if it helps. I'll be checking for any posts from you tomorrow and the day after. I know only too well how hard this must be for you, particularly at this time of the year, but try to think of how lucky Suki has been to share her life with you. If she could, she would thank you for the love, care and adventures you have provided. If only all dogs could be so fortunate. Thinking about you. Tony

Cholismom

Jan 02, 2013

To: Sukismum

Oh Sukismum,  I feel so very much for you.   I know the feeling all to well.  I loved my Choli as if she were my own little girl.  I tried desperately to keep her alive.  In the end, I listened to my vet who said that the disease was poisoning her from within.  I did not want that for my little girl.

As I type this, the tears are streaming down my face.  The pain of losing someone that you love is so dreadfully painful.  Others on this site gave me great advice. Tony, specifically told me to remember our happy days together.  Which is what I do on a daily basis.

I am praying for you and Suki.
God speed.  Hugs, Silvia (forever Choli's mom )

Sukismum

Jan 03, 2013

To: tonyb286

Thanks for your kindness, my beautiful Suki was weaker by morning she was unable to walk by herself. My daughter and husband had done night duty with her, since she came to us from the cat and dog shelter Suki had never spent a night on her own, and now unable to get upstairs we took it in turns to stay with her in the living room. That morning when she saw me she wagged her tail and tried to give me her paw. Looking at me with her sweet, trusting brown eyes it truly broke my heart, I felt I was letting her down so badly taking her life, she was still alert but I didn't want her to suffer at all, I didn't want her to be in any pain or fear, and I know this disease is relentless and won't let her go.
The vet came at 10.30am, Suki knew I'm sure, she mustered all of her strength and got up out of her bed and walked to me resting her head on my shoulder.

Sukismum

Jan 03, 2013

To: Cholismom and tonyb286

the vet watched her and said what an effort it must be for her to stand. Through the tears I asked him if her would sedate her before giving her the lethal injection, which he did. Sadly she still cried, it was awful, I so wish she was still with me as I know I will never ever meet another dog like Suki, I still can't believe she has gone, it was all so quick less than a week. R.I.P. my darling Suki, I love you dearly and shall miss you always.....

tonyb286

Jan 03, 2013

To: Sukismum

It breaks my heart to read your post, even though I knew it was coming. Today was the worst day for you. Tomorrow will be hard, but be assured and reassured that you did the right thing - not for you, perhaps, but for your lovely Suki. And you are right, you will never meet another dog like her. Like all dogs, she was unique, but she is not suffering now anymore, which is something to feel peaceful about. You have done the right thing at the right time to help her out of the pain and torment of this dreadful disease. We love our dogs so deeply, because they give us their total loyalty and love regardless of who we are, what we look like or what we do in this world. Suki was truly blessed to have such a wonderfully loving family that cared for her so much. In time, you will remember the happier times you have shared with her - and, in time, these memories will be fondly rather than painfully remembered. It has been a year now since I lost my beautiful rescued lurcher, BB, and I still cry occasionally - but mostly I am now able to smile as I think and talk about her. This process will happen to you too. You will grieve, get uncontrollably upset, perhaps even feel guilty about helping her pass ... and all these feelings are perfectly natural. I am so sorry for how you feel right now - but try hard to appreciate that Suki had the gift of being in your company, being loved deeply and enjoying so many adventures during her all too short lifetime. If she were able to thank you, she would, so instead, I will say it on her behalf ... thank you Suki's mum. Run free Suki. Tony x

Cholismom

Jan 04, 2013

To: Sukismum

Dear Suki's mom,

As I read your comment on the train, the tears welled up and quietly I cried. I am so so sorry for your loss.

For now every picture and every memory will bring tears.  But, there will come a time when you will laugh.  Days after Choli past away, I would stare at the photos we took of her at Christmas, at parties and at family functions.  I hoped that just one of them would make me smile.  Now, they all make me smile ....and cry. But, mostly smile.  I'm fortunate that she was in my life.  Even if only for 11 years.

You, your daughter and husband all have wonderful stories to tell about Suki.  That time will come, when you can laugh. For now, I agree with Tony, remember how much you all enjoyed each other's company.  How fortunate she was to have your for her mom!

How she's in a better place running free. She's still with you and your family.  In your heart and soul, she will always be with you.

God Bless you and your family and God Bress Suki...Love, Silvia (Choli's mom).

Cholismom

Jan 04, 2013

To: tonyb286

Tony,

I just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you in what must be a most difficult time. Please take solace in knowing that for the past year BB has been running free, chasing squirrels and laying on cool grass with a warm sun over BB's head. God Bless BB and God Bless you, Tony.

Love, Silvia (Choli's mom).

tonyb286

Jan 04, 2013

To: Cholismom

Thanks Silvia. You made me laugh inside, which is quite a task at the moment (long story, so won't go into it) ... BB did chase squirrels during her lifetime. As a lurcher, she had the instinct to chase all small furry things, though on the very rare occasion that she caught one, she never quite knew what to do about it. She once caught a small cat, which I was horrified to find upturned on its back with BB standing over it as if ready to pounce ... my heart sank, but I needn't have worried. They stayed staring at each other for a few seconds, then the cat just got up and ran off, and BB stood there quite confused about the whole event. Ha. There was another time she chased a squirrel which of course just ran up the nearest tree in the park. BB sat at the bottom of the tree barking for what must have been 10 minutes. totally frustrated that the squirrel had an ability she didn't possess. Tony x

Sukismum

Jan 09, 2013

Just to let you know I got my Beautiful Suki's ashes back this evening, she is home, doesn't lessen the pain and loss though. At least she is with me, an awful week, she is such a terrible miss, still expect to hear her running up the stairs or see her at the door welcoming me home or just lying at the bottom of my bed..
RIP sweet Suki dog I love you dearly....

tonyb286

Jan 10, 2013

To: Sukismum

Grief takes its own time Sukismum. Getting the ashes back is just the beginning of a long journey. Over the coming weeks and months you will start to feel better, you will eventually start remembering Suki for the happy life she had with you and (hard to believe perhaps right now) you will ultimately be able to smile instead of cry when you think about her. We are here to support you through this journey, as many of us have gone through it ourselves. We totally understand and empathize with you. Take each day as it comes and take support from friends and family that appreciate what a huge loss this is. Thinking about you. Tony

Cholismom

Jan 10, 2013

To: Sukismum

When my sweet little Choli past away 7  months ago, my husband and I buried her by the fence, near the bird feeder.  Our home overlooks a small 1-5 grade school.  We chose this spot because she would sit there and watch the kids play, sometimes bark to get attention, but mostly sit and enjoy all the activity going on (the school children playing soccer, baseball, and the occasional group of little girls walking over to coo over how adorable she was - she really was super cute). For many months I wouldn't even look in that direction.  If I did, I wouldn't just tear up, I would sob.

Then,  the fall came.  Normally, I hate to see summer end. Living in NY, the winters can be brutal, the spring rainy, but the summers are grand.  But not last year.  Everything reminded me that Choli wasn't there to enjoy it.  Not the walks on the beach, the walks around the neighborhood, none of it. So I was glad fall was here.  I stopped in at our local garden center to pick up some fall flowers for the front and back of our home and low and behold I stumbled across a statue of a dachshund. Huh, can you beleive it!  It was her way of saying.  You can try to ignore me but I'm still here.  I bought that statue and put it right where I buried her.

Now, I walk out on to my porch and stare off to that corner and smile...with tears in my eyes...and I thank God for giving me all that time with her.

The healing process is a long journey, Sukismom.  I found this site to be very therapeutic.  Tony and Twobitsmom were so helpful to me. So please come here, write your thoughts.  There is always someone, like me, around to read your thoughts and offer advice, or at least a cyber shoulder to cry on.  My thoughts are with you, Sukismom.  A huge hug.   Silvia

Sukismum

Jan 10, 2013

To: tonyb286 & cholismom

Thank you both so very much for your kindness, you are so right it helps so much to talk about my beautiful Spooky Suki, a pet name I had for her. She was a wonderful, kind, loving dog who sadly had such a hard life and two short years with me which she truly appreciated. When I first saw Suki she was at the shelter in the quarantine pens , a bag of bones and pregnant. She had been dumped on a main road in Carlisle and was in a terrible state. The warden said that if they caught the person who had done this to her they would be prosecuted. I was drawn to this beautiful brown and white Lurcher at first the people at the shelter tried to get me to take another dog as they said our family had been assessed for a medium sized dog and she was classed as large breed. I had to point out that she was in fact no slightly smaller than the dog they wanted me to adopt !!!! Then they said as she was in pup they couldn't hold her for me as she would have to have the pups and then wean them before they would consider putting her up for adoption, this they said would take months at this point I even offered to foster her while she went through all of this but they wouldn't hear of it, I left the shelter that day very disappointed..
After the weekend I received a phone call telling me that management at the cat and dog shelter had decided that I could adopt her as long as I could wait until her pups were weaned, I was ecstatic and agreed immediately. Thus began numerous visits to the shelter every other day to get to know this beautiful dog who I named Suki, she was so sweet natured, and she would smile when you went into her kennel, something the girls who looked after her were quick to point out. After the pups were born, she proved to be a good mother, staff said this was something she had obviously done before, as the pups got older I was able to bring her home for a few hours and then a day and then over night and eventually when the pups were 12 weeks Suki came home with me for good. I was so happy, she was so grateful, you could tell, always eager to please, things I noticed about her were someone had spent time with her, training her, she would sit, give a paw, walk to heel, and wait, but she was also nervous of sticks and loud noise she would cower at these so I guess someone had hurt her some time. I loved my Suki dog so much, spending as much time as possible with her, she so loved to be with me, leaning against me, sitting with her paw on me or just staring intensely at me, she was just so gentle and sweet natured, I manage a home for the elderly and the residents loved for her to come in for the day, she wasn't boisterous, just trusting and gentle, she hated being parted from me and would cry if I left the room when we were at work. I so miss Suki she was one special dog who had known hardship and still remained sweet and trusting....

tonyb286

Jan 10, 2013

To: Sukismum

Suki sure was lucky to have found you. While she obviously had a dreadful start to her life, the last two years couldn't have been better - she got all the love, care and attention she needed, and clearly gave it back to you in bucket loads every day. Lurchers are amazing dogs - and Suki was a prime example of that - affectionate, chilled out, loving and loyal. They are such characters - and sometimes astonishingly intuitive and intelligent. I love lurchers, perhaps you've guessed that. I have had two in the last 20yrs, both rescues, and both have left a huge hole in my heart when they left. Suki is at peace now, and while that might be the only compensation, in time, you will remember the good days you have had with her - and smile, knowing you were both lucky to have shared your lives together, albeit for too short a time. Tony

Cholismom

Jan 11, 2013

To: Sukismum

Your beautiful relationship has left a lump in my throat. It truly is fortunate that she found you!  Life works in mysterious ways.  Someone above decided that she had suffered enough and said this lovely girl is going to someone who will love her and enjoy her.

Suki's intense stare at you was her way of communicating to you = "you can't be real? So, I must make sure that you are here. Can you read my thoughts, because if you can you must know that  I really really really love you."

You are a wonderful human being Sukismum.  The world needs more of you.  Bless you!

Love,  Silvia

Sukismum

Jan 16, 2013

Two weeks since Suki passed and missing her so much, can't even think about going on any of the walks I regularly took her, just couldn't face it.
We are due some snow at the weekend and again will find it hard as she so loved running around in it...
Just wish I'd been more aware of this awful disease and just how common it is. I sure would have had yearly blood checks with her if only I'd known...my heart goes out to all the dogs and people who will have this horrible experience to face out of the blue as so many of us have.

tonyb286

Jan 16, 2013

To: Sukismum

In the early days and weeks of grieving, everything reminds us of what we have lost. And that's because our best friends share so much of our routines, our free time and our love ... they are a huge part of our lives and we miss them so much when it is their time to leave. Gradually, these hurtful things will ease, and in time you will start to smile again, remembering Suki with good and happy memories rather than traumatic and sad ones. Suki was so lucky to have enjoyed so much love. Not all dogs have that advantage. So, despite grieving, be aware that you did all you could and gave Suki a fabulous life, full of great adventures, care and attention, and bagfuls of love. What dog could ask for more. This disease is dreadful and one day, maybe sooner rather than later, an effective treatment will be found, so our best friends in the future won't have to suffer so much. You are in my thoughts Sukismum. Tony x

Cholismom

Jan 17, 2013

To: Sukismum

My heart goes out to you.

I truly hope that some of this helps.  Losing a loved one can be such a lonesome journey. You spend a lot of time thinking, wanting to talk to those around you but chose not to so as not to remind them and have them feel the same pain that you feel.  The first few weeks, it truly helped to sit up at 3:00 in the morning and put my thoughts on line for others to read.  My husband was already so inconsolable.  Choli was his first dog and the slightest mention would have him well up with tears.  So I am so glad that I found this website.  Its cathartic.  The responses shared by others helped too.  Tony's kind words were always so uplifting.  A true cyber friend.  He help to free me of a good bit of the pain.

Tony is right.  Think of the happy times you shared. Those lovingly endless stares that she gave you.  The warmth of her soul that she provided you but also the warmth and love you provided her!  Thank goodness that she had you.

My heart is with you. Bless you and your family.  Love, Silvia

tonyb286

Jan 17, 2013

To: Cholismom

Hi Silvia. Hope everything in your world is peaceful, contented and optimistic for the year ahead. Thank you so much for your kind words. My best way of grieving, it turns out, is to concentrate on trying to help support others - it's perhaps thinking about other people that I can divert my mind from thinking inwardly ... if that makes sense. Anyway, I'm reassured by your words and hope I can continue to offer the same level of comfort to others in need that are visiting MedHelp. I often curse the Internet, but in this case, it has proved to be a very useful vehicle for worried and/or grieving dog owners. Lots of love to you and yours. Tony x

Sukismum

Jan 17, 2013

To: tonyb286 & Cholismom

I'd just like to say thank you both so much for your time and the kindness you have shown towards me during this most awful weeks since I found Suki to be ill and then losing her to renal failure so suddenly, I really do appreciate it, once again thank you.
Louise x

tonyb286

Jan 18, 2013

To: Sukismum

You are very welcome, Louise. The nicest thing in the world is to find kindhearted new friends like you, even if it is only in cyberspace. I hope you are feeling that as each week passes, the enormous level of grief felt over losing your wonderful Suki is lessened ever so slightly. Tony x

Cholismom

Jan 18, 2013

To: tonyb286

Hi Tony,

You are an inspiration.

I literally wanted to die after Choli's passing. Reading your responses helped me to breath. There were days that I would ride the train home and stare out the window and then the tears would fall. But each time I would write you would respond. And it would help me get through the next couple of days. Reading your responses to others parents also helped me get into a more positive frame of mind.

If you get a chance take a look at my profile. I've uploaded a picture of the two girls we picked up from a kill shelter. These two girls were pretty roughed up. In time we learned that Ruth had been used to breed numerous times, ear infections in both ears, fleas, urine issues. For months her face always looked worried, bordering on sad. She needed us. If it weren't for you she wouldn't have found us and we wouldn't have found her.

They say there are angels on earth and you are proof that they exist.

Love to you and yours...Silvia xxx,

Cholismom

Jan 18, 2013

To: Sukismum

Hi Louise,

You are an amazing person. When I told my husband about you and Suki, how the two of you met and your love affair, well he got weepy. You are a beautiful person with a huge heart. I wish the best for you and your family. May your heart hurt less with each passing day. Peace, Silvia

Sukismum

Apr 07, 2013

To: tonyb286 & cholismom

It's been over 3 month since I lost sweet Suki~dog and the pain of losing her does not lessen. Today I feel particularly raw, the sun is shining and they burn the heather out on the hills, perhaps it's a reminder of the lovely walks that we used to share and that I now cannot face them without her. Only once have I ventured to one of them, it was in the depths of winter when the snow lay thick upon the ground. I could only stand at the bridge, the beginning of our old walk but i was unable to go any further. My little black whippet has taken to sleeping on my bed at night as Suki used to, though I love her dearly she is in no way as sweet natured and loving as Suki was and it pains me to know that I will never meet another like her.

tonyb286

Apr 07, 2013

To: Sukismum

Hi Louise. I am so sorry you have had a bad day. Three months is no time at all. It can take months and even years to be free of the deep and dreadful grief of losing a special companion, friend and family member. And even then (I know, believe me) there can be days when it all floods back, days when the tears won't stop and days when the world seems so much sadder without our wonderful dogs living in it.

It has been 2yrs since I lost BB. She was my world. An extraordinary lurcher that travelled life's path with me. She was my rock during very tough times. When it was her time to leave, it left me grief stricken for over a year. And even now, just the other night in fact, I found it hard to get off to sleep, because she was in my heart and head and all I wanted to do was cry. I still miss her. She was like my shadow, always there, always comforting, always intuitive.

But, time moves on. We now have a new rescue living with us, Sally the greyhound, who's completely different to BB. Each and every dog is so different, which is a good thing, because it stops us feeling guilty about another hound stepping into the previous one's shoes. Sally is now the younger dog, and Giro (our Rottie mix, but the softest mut you could ever wish to meet) is now the older man. His role is reversed, as he was the young one when BB was alive.

Your black whippet must be sensing your emotions and while she may not be as sweet natured as Suki was, I'm sure you wouldn't want to be without her - and as time goes on, she will grow into your world as surely and certainly as night follows day.

Taking the same walks with another dog is always a difficult one. Its hard the first few times, but it does get easier, and after a while the walk becomes more associated with current dog(s) and the adventures they have, rather than associated with the sadness of loss.

Of course, you will never ever forget Suki - and neither will I - but I really hope as summer approaches, you allow yourself to feel more uplifted, more contented and more at ease with the loss of Suki. I do feel for you Louise. It's a hard journey. But try to remember that Suki is at peace now, and there are others that truly need your love and support. Remember the good times, which were many - and put the minority of sad times to some calm and quiet place in your head.

As always, I am here - along with others - whenever you want or need to talk.

Take good care of yourself - and your little whippet!! Love, Tony x

yellowsummerrose

Apr 18, 2013

To: all

My dog Blanca is in renal failure now and is on morphine pain meds. He too had heart disease and the meds in part caused the kidney disease. He does not want to leave. Is there any miracle answer?

tonyb286

Apr 19, 2013

To: yellowsummerrose

Hi. I am sorry that you and Blanca are going through this. How old is Blanca? Have your vets told you what stage the renal failure is at? Is he still eating and drinking normally? Tony

Cholismom

Apr 19, 2013

To: yellowsummerrose

Hi Yellow Summer,

As Tony asked...is Blanca drinking and eating? Ask your vet about hydrating Blanca. Initially, I hydrated our little one, every other day for about two years. This should help...along with my prayers for you and Blanca. God Bless. Silvia

Cholismom

Apr 19, 2013

To: Sukismum

Oh my goodness Louise,

I'm so sorry for not getting back to you sooner.  I know how difficult this is.

It's been ten months since Choli's passing. And yet when I get into my jeep, I still look towards the passenger's seat expecting to see her.  I can recall that in her happier days, it was her tail wagging and front paws leaning over to me with a look that said  "where are we going today, mom?"
In her last days it was me carrying her back and forth to the vet. Paying special attention not her hurt her.

In my closet is my favorite suit that I have not worn in ten months.  Because it was the suit I wore to take her to the hospital for the last time.  Her hair is still on it...Every once in a while I take it out, smell it, hoping that I can still somehow connect myself to her..cry..then I put it back... I'll never dry clean it.

But Louise, it will get easier.  It takes a lot of time.  Suki was a wonderful being and you loved and continue to love her.  Your big heart needs time to heal.

It is a cliche but only time can help to ease the pain.  I thought for sure that I would never get over Choli's passing.  I have good days and bad days.  Fortunately, the good days are starting to out weigh the bad ones.

I like to think that where Suki, BB and Choli are ...there is no pain, no hydration or medication.  Just squirrels, meadows and lots of warm sun and that every day they are having adventures.

Someday, you, Tony and I will see our loved ones.  Until then, they are soaking up lots of sun.

Well it's 7:AM.  And now I'm a wet mess.  Fortunately, there is no one in the office yet.  (Mascara running down the face - like Alice Cooper- only looks good on Alice Cooper - and even then I wonder)

There is a church near by that I go to.  I'll stop in today.  With a special prayer for that big heart of yours.

Peace...Silvia

cubanita1654

Apr 19, 2013

To: GizmoBanditMom

you make me cried like a baby, i feel sorry for your loss, i had my siberian husky name Lassie who was sick yesterday with vomiting and that is a nightmare that i dont wish to anyone, see my dog is sick is the most horrible thing happened to me, i imagine how your feel, god have him now and he rest on peace and i know before he closed his eyes forever he was knew how much you and your family love him, you dog was lucky because he have a woderful family who love him to the end, i keep you and my family in your prayers and please think in adopt another dogs, is too many dogs in this world looking to have the opportunity to have a family like you.

yellowsummerrose

Apr 19, 2013

To: all

Blanca passed away 4-19 of renal failure. It is a great loss.

tonyb286

Apr 19, 2013

To: yellowsummerrose

I am so sorry. Blanca's renal failure must have been in its final stages when you posted, in which case there would have been nothing you or your vet could have done to prevent the inevitable. The last stage of kidney failure can bring about decline and death alarmingly fast. But Blanca is at peace now - and if he could, he would thank you for everything you did for him and the love you gave him throughout his life. Run free Blanca. Tony

yellowsummerrose

Apr 19, 2013

To: all

Thank you all so much. It means a lot to meet other people who care and have experienced same. I did not believe there was an answer, but in desperation you reach out and try anyway. He was a beautiful white spotted chinese crested, 15 yrs old.I had a good vet and we kept him alive 2 months with subq iv. I guess that 2 extra months was the miracle. My decesased husband and I raised 5. I loss Miss Harriet in Febuary. Now, there is only Josephine, mamma dog, who will be 17 in Aug. They have been my life since I started this in 1994. Blanca was beautiful inside and out and he is with the angel dogs tonight. Thank You.

tonyb286

Apr 20, 2013

To: yellowsummerrose

You have really gone through a terrible time. Loosing Miss Harriet so recently, and then Blanca. My heart goes out to you. Give Josephine a huge hug from me - and take a big cyber hug from me to yourself too. I am so sorry for your loss. Tony

Cholismom

Apr 20, 2013

To: yellowsummerrose

I am so sorry for your loss.My heart goes out to you and Josephine. Your home sounds like such a loving family. Blanca was very lucky to have you, If you need to let it out, please come here. There is always someone here to help ease some of the pain. It helped me...hopefully it will help you, A huge hug to you, God Bless,,,Silvia

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