Is this an abuse or not?

[skrom]

My husband and I have a different sexual desire. He wants to have a sex almost every night, but for me it is OK to have it once in two weeks. He is really insisiting on having sex more often, and although I have no desire I have to follow his request. He does not forse me, but keeps tauching me and asking for sex, untill I finally give up. I was trying to explain him, I get tired by the end of the day and just want to sleep, but itv seems when he is in a mood nothing can stop him. If I decide to avoid sex, he will be mad at me and might stop talking to me for a couple days. From another point I realize if I will not have sex with him he might start looking around. What should I do?

[Katy80]

I agree with Rose about it being a two way street. I have some conflict in my relationship on this topic.  He wants more sex, I want more sleep. I try not to say things that put his needs and mine in conflict.  The answer is not either or in my eyes, but a spiteful comment from a tired grouchy spouse isn't helpful.

It also really helps if I ask for what I need.  I think that is easier for some ppl than others. I have found that if my hubby helps around the house and lets me rest (Saturday mornings are great for this) I feel supported, less tired and closer to him. That helps me want more sex.

Communication about sex can be challenging, but it's worth the effort.  Best of luck 2u.

[kittycat1433]

I will tell u what is bad is being my age and my husband being older and he never want's sex mabey 1nce a mo or twice it makes me feel ugly and unwanted .Im sick of it.I have been in a marriage were itwas like this and that is awful also. I really don't want sex either it is just the idea he dosen't want it.He will cheat any man NOT getting sex the way they want it just seem's to be their nature a women like was said in a post here will jst go without and i do because idon't cheatbut theris something in a man that most of the time can't be stopped ur hubby sound' like he may have issue's so i would just try every now and then try taking a really hot bath put on a dab of make-up a little perfum and relax and just try anyway im not one to even be giving advice but i know how i see it.

[allmymarbles]

Are you in menopause? Maybe your hormones are out of whack. If that is so, desire should return. Most women are sexually active long after menopause.

[skrom]

I guess - me.

[Rainbow_Ike]

So what changed in the last 3-4 years? The amount of sex he seems to need, or your tiredness and lack of interest?
(not pointing fingers - this was how you described it)

[skrom]

It is a problem for last 3-4 years.