A little nervous

[luvabugga]

Tomorrow is my first appt. with the pm doc since I stopped the Norco 19 days ago, and he has no idea I stopped.  Little nervous about this.  I know he'll have a script in his hand when I walk through the door.  Not sure if I'm strong enough for this yet!

[bama88]

I didn't mean to scare you. Just want you to be educated about this crazy disease. We've all been there. So don't be embarrassed. The ball is in your court. Your in charge of your actions. And listen to your heart. Not your brain. Lol.

What helped me the most is when I told myself I had two choices. To keep on taking the meds for life and see where that took me or to stop and see what happened.

I also told myself ill give myself six months or so to see if I really needed them. I couldn't handle the forever part in the beginning. But now I don't hurt. Pain was a big fear for me. How about you.

[YesLife4Me]

A good pain management Dr doesn't rely on opiate therapy but instead, getting to the root of the problem.   Are you more scared you won't be able to say no?   Or are you scared that they won't treat your condition if you don't take the pain meds?    

[luvabugga]

OK...now I'm just scared!!!  It's my pain management doctor.  It's how I started taking Norco for a back and neck problem.  It's the regular monthly appt.  Last month I got the script, but only took it for two weeks and then trashed them...and haven't taken them since.

Ugggghhhh...not liking any of this!

[bama88]

Your playing a dangerous game with yourself. Very very dangerous. And I'm worried for you. I had the same problem in the beginning of my road to recovery. I had to go to the doctor. Just had a major operation. And I thought I was strong enough to say no. Well I said no that day. But I later turned around and filled them. And well.....I went wild with my meds. I wasn't ready to stop. I wanted to believe I was in control of my meds. I'm a control freak. And most addicts are control freaks. And the fear of being embarrassed to admit I had aproblem was a major issue. Most people we are close to know we have a problem even if we can't see it or admitt it. So in reality all we are doing is fool ourselves. Now is the time to get really honest with yourself. Even if you don't want to. If you are sitting on the fence you'll eventually fall off. And if your not completely committed to sobriety your not completely ready.

Ask yourself is the temptation worth it. Do you really want to keep staying on the merry go round??

I don't want to sound like I'm coming down on you. I want you to be successful.

All of us have been where your at. Consider it a test. Dont stress too much over it.

And do you mind sharing what type of appointment it is??

Just want to help.

[luvabugga]

I thought about that, but of course I have the first appt.  I'd have to call from the parking lot as I'm walking in the door....and they'd probably think I was some kind of freak!  

I think I'm going to leave a message tonight and cancel it.

[YesLife4Me]

It really is amazing how much stronger our minds get the further away from wd and detox we get.   That's more clean time under our belt that we don't want to lose.  So I would say that yes it will help some.   But, our tricky addict minds are always looking for an opening.   I think the best thing you could do is to just tell your Dr before you get into anything else is that you have chosen not to use opiates for your pain control any longer and that you would like to discuss non narcotic options such as continuing your PT and the cervical procedure.  Your Dr will be more than happy to help you explore other options and be thrilled you have made the choice not to use the Norco.