Rehab

[Dane74]

Hey y'all, I am actually on the plane now off to rehab!!!!   I am so scared of detox and leaving my family, but i know deep down inside, this is the right thing to do.  I can only pray that i will get through this and come out stronger than ever and continue to seek therapy.  This really has been a long dark road for me and i am ready to take charge of my life, i am going into rehab with an open mind and i am going to fight this demon with everything i got in me, and i will WIN!!!!  I will not let myself or my family down that's for sure.  i am scared of the unknown and what life will be  like clean,  since i only really know life on pills, but i am ready to see life with a clear mind.  I want to say thank you to all of you that have stuck by me through this journey,  I cant thank you all enough for the support.  So now its time for me to put on my armor vest, fight this demon, because now that i want to be clean the devil will be trying to come after me with his arrows, but i got my armor vest on and i will beat his A$$!!!!!  i will keep y'all posted as much as i can while in rehab and for sure when i return home, but in the meantime i want to say to all, keep fighting and soon life will be allot clearer and just beautiful, i know there is light at the end of this tunnel and i cant wait to see it!!!!!  XO to all Dane

[lulu747]

Dane,
Hi darlin'!  I am so happy for you that have embarked on your journey to reclaiming your life.  Remember it is a journey and not a race!  Keep that open mind and more importantly, an open heart.  You are healing, so make sure you treat yourself with lots of love and compassion.  I am rooting for you!

xo
Lu

[vicki595]

Coming off the sub will be fine. Don't worry about it. They're doing it the way it should be done:FAST!!   LOL!  That place sounds just perfect for you!

[Dane74]

Day3 sober for me, and moving upward and onward!!  One day at a time and so some points its hour by hour.  All the therapy is so draining, i see one on one for an hour each, and then group.  I am really learning alot and getting to terms with the unlining issues that brought me to use.  So overall its going well.  I am afraid of coming of the subutex, i have one week on on it then they will start the taper.  Hopefully it will not be that bad.  They sure keep you busy here and i did meet allot of lovely people.  I am so glad i did decide to go and get help and i am feeling positive that i want going to walk out of rehab a new person.

[minn66]

Good morning, Dane,

It sounds like you are in a great place and just where you need to be. I don't think you have much to worry about with the sub. From what I have read here, if used short term as intended they are very helpful and you won't have a problem with them. Since you will be on them a short time and tapered off you should be fine.

Your post really is encouraging and may inspire someone else to get help.

Please stay in touch as you are able.

Love and hugs,

Minn :)

[Dane74]

Hey All,  well, i made it to rehab and i am  on day one clean.  Its is very nice place that keeps me very busy and i have a full schedule throughout the day.  Currently i am in the detox house with a nurse right in the next room.  They have me pretty heavily medicated i started heavy Wd's this AM, so i went to the nurse she takes your blood pressure and accesses  you on how bad or active WD i am in.  I was losing my mind this morning and they started me on subutex 8mg, i take 4mg in the am and 4mg in the pm, they gave me 3 mg of Klonipn and serotal.  At night they give me the serotal as well just a higher dose.  Tomorrow i get all my blood work done and also a urine test again.  the staff is great and very understanding and they try to keep you as comfortable as possible.  I missed the group therapy this morning because i was too sick but then after the subutx i felt better and was able to go to all my therapies.  It is very draining for sure and man do they dig deep down into your inner child, and that freaks me out a bit.  My emotions are running wild, i mean i cry over everything and i am not a cryer.  But tomorrow is another jammed packed day at picking my brain so lets see how it goes.  I am just taking this day by day.  I am only on the subutex for a week and then they will taper me off of that.   I hear that coming off of subutex is worse is that true?  I actually cant believe it can be any worse than the opiates.  I just cant wait to finish this detox crap and then they will move me into the main house where all the other people are staying. i am lonely in the detox, i hate that i am all alone down here but glad the nurse is right there if i need her, but i do look forward to moving up to the main house and getting  roommate.  I am so homesick already and dont know how i can stay this long away from my kids, i feel so guilty about leaving them and our phone conversations are cut short with the 3 hour time difference:(  But i promise y'all i am giving this 100 percent and i am doing all the things they want me to do i just follow my schedule and attend all my appointments.  I am actually going to try and get hypnotized next week, i met with her today and i really like her and she gave me all the information about what it all entails, hey it will be a first and i have nothing to lose.  So far i do not have a craving to use, so that is a good thing, but i am very well aware that can change. So overall i am doing OK, they told me the worst is to come around day 3 or 4.  Ok all, going to take my sleeping pill and off to la la land and tackle tomorrow. Thanks again all for all your support!!!!

[dominosarah]

Go with a spirit that fears nothing~~~sara