Withdrawal for 30mg/day for 3 months

[percsfordepression]

Hello all.  I have been taking percocet once a day for 4 1/2 years on and off (mostly on).  It has dramatically helped in times of severe depression, and has been the only drug/medication that has come close to helping with my depression and anxiety.  For those years the most I would take was up to 15mg a day.  For the past 3 months I have taken around 30 mg a day (3 months ago I had a very physically painful life event and needed more percocet to cover the pain).  

At this point, it has been a long while since I have seen myself at baseline.  I am curious about what my depression and anxiety would look like without the it.  I have questions like - will I have more energy to cultivate healthier coping strategies, like exercise and healthy eating?  Will I actually be less depressed on average if I am not focusing so much energy on the use of percocet?  Can I live my life/cope without any medication?

I am currently weaning down my dose.  Took 20 mg for 3 days, 15 mg for 3 days, and am now on my second day of 10 mg.  I plan to take 10 for one more day, then 5 for 3 days, and then be off of it by Tuesday.  I am finding that I am EXTREMELY tired, and having what seems like some withdrawal effects by the end of the day before I take my dose.  However, I don't know how much of that is just my normal anxiety.  

My questions are: how likely is it that I am having withdrawal symptoms even though I have been on a relatively low dose?  If the exhaustion has to do with the reduction in dose, how long do I need to be off of percocet to get my energy back?  

Thanks so much for your responses!!

[annibelle48]

2 and a half weeks after going cold turkey off a 5 year addiction of opiate and Ativan. I still have some "Ugh days" but nothing unmanageable. The good by far outweighs the bad.  Everyone is different so the exact day it'll happen is unknown... But it will happen.
About your "baseline".... One thing for sure is: the drug did not do for you at the end what it did for you at the beginning.... As addicts, there's no "starting over" for us. Our brain chemistry has already been changed, therefore, if we pick up even one time we'll be right back at the worst of our addiction straight away. So, a second thing for sure is: your mental/emotional/physical "baseline" will be a heck of a lot better once you're clean and thru the worst of the withdrawals than it ever was while on the drug. Give yourself some time and try to take one day at a time and live in today... When things start to look up (and they will!), reevaluate your baseline status. At that time you'll know if you need help... There are plenty of options for anxiety/depression/mood disorder that will not interfere with your recovery. Chemical imbalances are real and treatable but before you can know if you truly have a chemical imbalance, you need to be free of the chemicals you were putting in your body!! You're gonna be ok, one day at a time. Looking further than today just causes anxiety... Living in the past causes depression. Try to relax and enjoy your new, clean life:)

[percsfordepression]

Curious - how long off of things did you have that feeling when you woke up??

[percsfordepression]

Really awesome to hear that; I can't wait!!!  A big fear of mine is that my "baseline" without them is bad... that I just have depression/anxiety/bad memory/fuzzy thinking anyway.  I'm just really hoping that's not true, and that being off of this will allow me to live better...

here's a link:
http://www.smartrecovery.org/meetings_db/view/

[annibelle48]

Keep your head up....you'll get there.  The memory thing will get better too....I thought I was getting Alzheimer's!!!  I woke up one morning and thought "wow, I feel so much better...so, this is what "normal" must feel like!" seriously...big change.  That feeling of well-being down deep in your stomach comes and life feels lighter and doable.  Stay with us... (I'll have to look into SMART meetings :)

[percsfordepression]

Thank you for sharing your experience as well; I am sooooo hoping to feel clearer soon!  I am truly crossing my fingers and hoping that without it I will be able to get moving and using my brain again!  My memory is so shot;  thought processes are sluggish; energy low...

I have some experience with NA/AA from many years ago.  Honestly, I love the social support structure that the meetings provided, but I just don't buy the 12 step philosophy (identifying as an addict/alcoholic permanently throughout life, necessity of "higher power," to name a few).  I am interested in checking out some SMART meetings...

In terms of therapy; I am seeing someone once a week.  I'm seeing her in a couple of days - she's been great and has offered more support (daily check-ins) but I have been okay so far!

[annibelle48]

I wanted to address one of your first questions... I felt the opiate really helped my depression and mood but the anxiety and the control the drug had over me made me decide to quit. The extreme pain I had while on the drug is gone. My mind has cleared and I look forward to every day. I no longer feel "heavy" and depressed. I feel so much better emotionally since I'm  off the drug.... Seriously!!! I wouldn't have believed the change. I agree you need support... AA and NA are soooo helpful. And going to a therapist will help a lot. There is financial help... Just find a therapist and ask what's available. Use the Internet to look into it and find meetings.? You're not alone

[vicki595]

Hi- I'd stay at the current dose until you are experiencing minimal symptoms and then drop. The amount of time between drops is a little different for everyone so listen to your body...

I understand about "refill security" so you really need to put it out of your mind unless you need it to continue your taper.  I'm glad you extended your support system...Have you thought about going to AA or NA meetings? A therapist?  

[percsfordepression]

Hi there,

Since my last post we (my roomy and I) have adjusted the taper plan to be more reasonable (though still possibly a bit aggressive).  I took 12.5 that night, 12.5 yesterday, and will take 12.5 today.  We will then decrease by 2.5 every 3-5 days.  I'm still feeling chills etc., but hoping that I'm just still experiencing the effects of going from 27.5mg to 10mg way too fast.

I am hesitant to talk to my doc for many reasons; and I will admit that the "security of knowing you can get a refill" is still on my mind.  I would love to go to a treatment program, but truly cannot financially afford to.  I have however, since reading your post, have enlisted more supportive help from close friends.

Hanging in there at the moment!!

[vicki595]

Okay. Are you afraid to talk with your doctor about this? Believe me, I understand. I struggled with that, as well. What's important when we want to stop the pills is eliminating our sources...

With the security of knowing you can get a refill any time...it's likely you'll get that refill at the very first trigger or craving. I'm assuming here that the Percocet is prescribed.   I did tell my doctor eventually but I asked her not to document anything about it. She agreed because she understood my reasons. I work in healthcare and that info can be so easily accessed in spite of HIPPA, etc...

Also, recovering from addiction requires a lot of support so you might want to check into a recovery program of some kind. There are many programs around...the more support you have, the more successful you'll be. Right now, the relapse rate is very high so we need to work hard at recovery!

[percsfordepression]

yes

[vicki595]

Do you consider yourself addicted?

[percsfordepression]

Thanks for the tips.  Luckily my roommate has been holding them for me and distributing them for a while.

Have not consulted with my doc; I've found the less I discuss the pills with the medical community the better off I have been.

[vicki595]

I think you'll lose motivation a lot faster with this kind of taper because you don't feel good!   I know it's difficult to taper but it's more gentle on your body if you slow things up and i understand about wanting to do it fast but it doesn't work that way...

Just go slowly to keep withdrawal symptoms at bay and if you're being tempted to take more than the taper allows (which is common) just have your friend hold the pills and give them to you at th scheduled times. Also, writing down the taper plan is very helpful along with putting your daily allotment in a pill box or envelope.

Please know that this is a process and pressure is the last thing you need. Have you consulted your doctor about tapering off?

[percsfordepression]

Thank you so much for your response!  I will think about what you've suggested to taper more gradually.  I had been hoping to do this quickly to just "get it over with" without doing it cold turkey... thought this plan would be a decent middle ground, and I have some pressure from a friend who is helping me get off of it to do it quickly before I lose my motivation...  

[vicki595]

Hi there and Welcome-

I'm sure you're experiencing withdrawal symptoms which generally occur with a taper like you've described. We are not allowed to give a specific taper plan according to our forum guidelines BUT I can tell you from experience that your taper is too fast with too much of a dosage drop.

Slow it way down. There's no rush...Post often and ask questions; there's so much support here that you'll be amazed.

I agree with what you're doing here; trying to find your baseline. I understand how Percocet helps with depression but it's an off label use and can back fire!  You've already had to increase your dose to cover physical pain and that's not good.

You'll feel a lot better when you slow down your taper because your body will have more time to acclimate to the drop in dosage. I hope this helps...