seeking advice to help sister

[spiritualmedium]

My sister, son, nephew and brother held an intervention without the help of a professional.  I wrote a letter which was read during this intervention.  The letter was loving and non judgemental since I was in the same gene pool and realize could be me just as easily as it is her.  My sister is doing coke and drinking.  This intervention was more than a year ago. It was the second time this was tried without results. In the days just after the interventon I tried to contact my sister to no avail.  She has had no contact with me or the other members of the group who participated.  Should I leave things the way they are to be cruel to be kind?  Missing her.

[spiritualmedium]

Thanks you all for your generosity of spirit and input.  Based on your advice I am going to
send my sister an email for Mothers' Day (she's a mom) with a note that i have been missing her.  Being out of her life hasn't helped her or me since it didn't motivate her to make any sinificant changes.  I know that form other siblings that she is still in touch with.  i will offer her my unconditional love and support.  Thanks again to all of you for taking the time to write tome.  Be prideful of your sobriety!
Yours in peace and light
spiritualmedium

[spiritualmedium]

Thank you all for your generosity of spirit and input.  Based on your advice I am going to send my sister an email for Mother's Day (she's a mom) with a note that I have been missing her.  Being out of her life hasn't helped her or me since it didn't motivate her to make any significant changes.  I know that from other siblings that she is still in touch with.  I will offer her my unconditional love and support.  Thanks again to all of you for taking the time to write to me.  Be prideful of your sobriety!
Yours in peace and light
spiritualmedium

[Mikeinthesouth]

I hope you guys offered her the help with the ultimatums........................................

[J_friend]

Hello my friend ... it sounds like you have a loving family, and you guys did what you needed to do with the intervention.  However, when an intervention takes place, I think it's important to try and be as detached from the outcome as you can be.  You had the courage to lay it on the line and be straight with your sister.  What she does with that information is up to her.  Sometimes people are so consumed in their addiction, they aren't ready to hear the message.  You may need to let go of some of your expectations and just be grateful you had the courage to tell her the truth.

Maybe you can contact your sister again (in person, phone, email, etc) and just let her know you love her and miss her.  Perhaps you can even tell her that even if she IS still using drugs, you still want to see her (unless that's not the case).  Either way, you sound like a very compassionate/loving sister, and I'm sorry your sister wasn't ready to seek help for her addiction.  

[bobby139]

wow,...there is nothin else i can add to what Cathy said, but wanted to wish you luck!
bobby

[cathy5841]

un fortunately unless an addict wants help you can not help them.  addicts seldom realize because of the drugs how much they hurt the ones that love them.  i know this because i am a recovering addict.  most timesit takes rock bottom for us to wake up, and sometimes that dont even wake us.  the best thing you can do is let her know you are there and love her unconditionally.  ask her reguardless of the circumstances to stay in touch you worry.  then hope seh does.  sorry i could not be of more help, but thise are the facts.  good luck to and your family
cathy