2 years ago the week after my mom died, we had taken care of her 24/7 broken and with dimentia for 1 year, i told my husband who treated her like a queen and helped me do everything cuz i was dealing with this anxiety and agoraphobia at the same time, that we would go to see his family, we used our travel trailer and i made a safe area with my books, etc. Anyway, the odd part was i couldn't drive the 2 blocks to the grocery store but could take a 1500 mile trip to az. My therapist said sometimes when you are soo far off your norm your attention is so absorbed by other things that the anxiety doesn't really take over. That trip was also the first flare up of this tooth i had pulled today and would not go to a hospital and had to have my dr call in a antibiotic to the next town in Nevada we were going thru, anyway digressing again but my point is you might be surprised that it is somehow different than our normal everyday life. You minght find it is just the momenturm toward wellness you want!!! anyway just a thought, flying is definately not an option at this stage for me either, if you don't have your own camper or trailer maybe rent a wini and do the same thing, set up your cocoon.
Travel is rough for SOOOOOO many of us with anxiety. I've been an anxious traveller since I was a child. It actually angers me something terrible. Something I should look forward to scares the crap out of me and causes stress and worry...what the heck??
The ways I have been able to get thru it some is both with some meds for actual travel day (usually while ON vacation I'm pretty good...it's the "travel" part that is hard)...and simply trying to soak in laughs and memories I know will be priceless, not only to ME, but also to my children. My kids have been a source of courage as I realize there are just some things I cannot "avoid" due to anxiety, or I am making my kids miss out too. A lil self induced guilt trip...but it helps! I also remind myself over and over that a vacation is a GOOD thing..something people everywhere count the moments to! I try to put myself in that normal "non-anxious person" state of mind.
One of the very BEST things for me after a vacation, minus the obvious good time, is the HUGE sense of accomplishment. It makes those previously "scary" local trips to the store laughable! Kind of a "If I could do that...I can do anything" viewpoint! I truly benefit from a MUCH lower anxiety level a good while after my trip!
Don't worry, though...you're not alone...there are MANY of us who have a REALLY rough time with vacations and travel. You'll be so glad you pushed thru it!
We even have "safe people", "safe times", etc. I know that just being around certain people makes me more anxious. The more comforting, loving and patient people become "safer" in our minds, even if we don't realize it on a conscious level.
What I find VERY ironic, with me and travel....is....the TRIP itself is hard (no matter the means of travel...car, air..actually prefer air b/c it's faster & like the OP, don't care for the trapped in a car feeling) but when I get settled IN to the "home away from home", it quickly converts into my new "safe place". I set up boundaries in my mind related to that location...again, the farther I go from it while on vacation, the more anxious I become.
This is also puzzling to me as by the end of the trip, you'd think we'd be relieved to head back to our REAL safe place...but NO! I become anxious about leaving my NEW sanctum! I even find myself a little sad to leave, not for NORMAL reasons of course, but because I've developed such a comfort level there. So, while adapting is a good thing...it's frustrating too! Just goes to show you how complex our thought processes are...and how our minds really DO serve to protect us, even from ourselves. It's good in the short-term, but in the long run, it leads to more avoidant behavior, and agoraphobia. Been there, done that...and still struggle with it to this day, despite having a much lower level of overall anxiety!
The good thing is...for those of you who have not experienced a huge level of anxiety remission yet...when I was taking meds, I sincerely got to the point where leaving my house and even travelling was a total NON issue. I could go just about anywhere at any time without so much of a second thought...which was fabulous. Sadly, after long periods of normalcy is when I would convince myself I was 'well" enough to not need meds anymore...only to throw myself back into the anxiety fray.
Just some tidbits. It really does help to share!