To those with MS

[Quixotic1]

I don't usually do this, because I read most of the posts and can usually answer my questions.  But, I need to know if any of you with definite MS feel the way I often do.

I feel carppy.  Therre is no other way to say it.  I feel crummy, almost all of the time.  My head roars, I feel weak, so fatigued that a trip to the store has me in bed.  Along with it I'm irritable and impatient.  I'm running to the BR with bladder cramps and everything down under feels strained and raw and achey (no UTI).  It's  not nausea, or sweating, or anything that I can relate to a specific illness, like I don't feel like the flu, or a cold or alleriges, or GERD.  In fact, eating is one of my few pleasures.  I have felt this way for the last few months.

My brain is working okay.

Other than the urinary, I have little pain, except for what breaks through with the TN - lots of little jaw pains recently and I see the dentist Monday, but no teeth are tender, gums are good.  My gait has slowed and I'm tripping alot and it just makes me mad.  Well, I am having really bad eye pain in both eyes intermittently for the last couple months and I am staying in a humidified room and using moisturizeing drops all the time and it is better today.

So, I hate going to the doctor and saying "I feel crummy" and not having anything to tell him specifically about why.

Do any of you just feel lousy?

Is it just a bad attitude?

Quix

[sg40]

... and the rest of you... Your strength and perserverence inspires me. To feel as bad as you do and still find the energy to come here and reach out - to give love and support and answers to the frightened newbies (and long-timers). That alone SHOULD be enough to allow you to be lifted above your suffering, if the world were a fair playing field.  I wish you a speedy recovery and a lightened load. Take care of yourself.

[cainer]

  yeh  every day  its hard to try to  feel  better--  when every  day  is a  challenge.    there  isnt  a  day   that  we  arent  reminded   or  scared  of   whats    going   to  happen  newxt???
   i have  even  resented   people   that  try  2  help   urgg   shouldnt  feel  that    but  its  there!!!     wish    you  the  best!!  tick

[meg321]

Seems as if its a majority vote...I too totally relate to feeling just plain lousy a lot of the time...I am always trying to move on and away from it though.  

I haven't been on here as much as I was, after  I get thru reading I am too tired to type it seems or I put it off til I feel better.

I have had some good and bad days.  I have had cateract surgery on both eyes now, the right eye was a cup of tea and the left eye just gave us trouble.   I had to go back to the OR once more but its doing well now.  My eye Dr has been there almost every day to see me.  What a great Dr he is.

I lost my headaches with the right eye surgery and now I am having pain with the left but it should get better.

I have made some plans and I want to be able to enjoy myself, they are on the 29th and 30th, i am planning on some fun !!

Oh, Quix, i hope you have some better days coming up.  And all of us really.  I have to stay positive, its all I have and it works well.

Love all of you,

meg

[Rena705]

Seems like pretty much everyone here is feeling about the same as you. I like Guitar_grrrrl's attitude though!!   She does what she can, when she can regardless of the repercussions but of course we can't all do that either.
You are so helpful to everyone Quix and it just doesn't seem justfied that you of all people are feeling so crappy!
You know that I haven't been around too much lately but I am doing my best to exercise daily and it really seems to be helping with the little icky feelings that I can't seem to explain.  I have the added problem of asthma and chronic bronchitis that slows me down some but I do what I can to get er done!  I recently underwent a MIBI test and echocardiogram due to a glitch on my last EKG and get my results back on Tuesday.  Then I had blood tests and an ultrasound on my thyroid due to pain in my neck as well as other symptoms that seem to point toward Hashimoto's (I hope not) but perhaps the results of these tests will tell me why I feel crappy most days (especially since most of my docs çan't accept my MS diagnosis).  You know how long I have been having a problem of getting up in the morning after 10 hours of sleep and having to go directly back to bed cause I can't keep my eyes open...well, it's still here 4 days out of 7 and the Amantadine isn't helping.  I have to agree with whoever said..."bottom line, MS S*CKS!!!
I certainly hope that you start to feel better soon and maybe once the weather gets sunnier and it gets easier to get out regularly for some fresh air and natural Vitamin D!  I hope your symptoms give you a break soon and I DO NOT believe it is a bad attitude, rather perhaps it's because you are not doing enough for yourself because you are too busy doing so much for others???  Maybe a change in your schedule and the time you spend on the computer needs to be thought about???  Just a suggestion but I really hope you start to feel better soon!!

Lots of Hugs,
Rena

[Sparkysarah]

Hi I am new to the forum today and have read many of your posts and have felt drawn to your wamth, honesty and giving to other people. Sometimes it is good to receive and look how many friends you have made, so in spite of feeling horrible, I am sure that you will feel some well deserved support in return for all that you have offered to others. Live in the moment and find something to make you smile :)

[Guitar_grrrl]

Hoo, boy, Quix.  I feel for you!  The roar (mine's pretty dull, thank goodness!), the exhaustion, the weakness, etc.,etc.,

I'm an avowed Fun Hog.  I do the fun stuff, anyway, knowing full well I'll pay for it the next two days or weeks.  But the fun is worth it, even if it's something as mundane as drawing up the next couple of day's menus and shopping for the ingredients.  Yes, this to me is fun, and yes, I'm a goofball, too.  I'll come home from the store, put the stuff away, and collapse in bed for the afternoon, utterly exhausted.

I don't participate in the same dangerous sports I used to (anybody want to buy a surfboard?), but there's this sick desire to push the fun envelope and hope I don't cause myself another relapse.

I'm so grateful I can still work 3 days a week.  I get to help other people come to diagnosis in the Cardiology world, so they can take their own plan of action.  It gets me out of my own head and personal medical problems.  I get the feeling your work here and on other forums is fulfilling, too.  You're still using your brilliant mind!

Yes, I feel cruddy, weak, spastic, stiff, buzzy, shocky, leaky, and depressed because I'm not performing my music any more for awhile, all on a daily basis.  I'm trying to make lemonade from the lemons the Universe is throwing me.  Some days, I don't have the energy to do even that.