Why not

[Thabiso]

I am 42 and married involved in a relationship with a 28 year lady living with her parents about 450kms away from where I am.  I have come to realize how strong and truelly I love this woman and about a few months ago agreed to have a baby together.  We have about two weeks ago established that she is pregnant, now the trouble is she would not want us to  meet as I would like us to.  Initially we were meeting about two weekends a month she now expect us to meet less frequently which thing I am totally unhappy with.  I want to be there for her and the baby besides I have made up my mind that I want to be with her and get out of the existing marriage.   I have on numerous occassion discussed my plans and intentions with her.  I am doing this for the three of us, i.e My love for her, herself and the baby. . Am I expecting too much here or being unreasonable.  

[mami1323]

Hey girl. I have been bed ridden from the flu. Slowly working my way back.

[Judy246]

Hi Mami...missed you!  Hugs...Judy


This mess is just beginnig, just wait until the wife and family find out...all hell is going to break lose and this will add to your finances....explain that one to your wife. Good luck, because you are going to need it and no sympathy here.

[mami1323]

Nothing much more to say other than karma sure did bite you in your a$$ didn't it?

[younggrandmother]

This is not good not good at all, you have created a new life. This was planned it was not a mistake. Why would you intentionally hurt someone you love, did you ever take into consideration your wife.The only way out is to be honest. Tell your wife about the g/friend,it is going to hurt her, but at least give her that much ,don't let her find out on the street that her husband is planning a life with someone else. If you don't one day she will get a letter or phone call with the bad news. You did love her at one time you had planes with her as you do now with the new girl.Remember how you felt the day you married her every thing was new and exciting is that what you were trying to get from this new relationship?  Your new g/friend may think that someday she will be the one at home like you wife is now not knowing what is going on is he planning a new life with someone else is it getting old ?If she is smart she will stay away till you do the right thing.She is very vulnerable don't prey on this give her time to think. Give her the space see needs . Take this time to get your life in order try to think about others not just yourself. You have made a lot of mistakes and you need to fix them starting at home.

[Myown]

yeah Julie you're right, he isn't getting any sympathy from any of us. :) I think if his wife were to hire Gloria Allred for her attorney - Gloria wouldn't even be as hard on him as we are.  

People make mistakes in life, but I think the thing that is bothering most of us (or all of us maybe) is that he went ahead and ~agreed~ to have a baby with this woman while he was still married.  I hope he realizes his mistake (now that we shoved it down his throat lol j/k) and tells his wife what happened because if she finds out from someone else that he is going to have a child with someone - that would be devastating.

ya know as women when in our 40's - 50's we go thru our changes and can quite wacky at times. I think doctors should study the male menopause a little bit too, because maybe he is going thru that. Nah, maybe not - who knows. Lets chip in and hire Gloria for his wife. LOL

[adgal]

She is the "other women" right now.  Why would she want to enter into a permanent relationship with you knowing you will probably do the same thing to her down the road.  Sounds like she just wanted a baby.  What a mess.  I will never understand why people don't just end one relationship before entering another.  Years ago I discovered that a man I was dating was married. I dropped him like a tonne of bricks.  Even had he offered to leave his wife for me, I would not have pursued it.  It he did it to her, he would do it to me.