do u think that having relationships before marraige is ok....?

[maharaja]

do u think that having more than one relationships before marraige is ok....?

[vsentz]

you have to try the fruit in he supermarket to select the best and buy it! lol

well, now speaking seriously... I am with RR on this one: you NEED to decide for yourself! imagine if we'd all act by what others say?? (there are some people tho, that do that..... zzzzzzzzz)
In the end, the most important thing here is: YOU.

I am not gonna play all prude here... I had my 'party' days back when.... do I regret it? Hell no!!!! it was fun.... I didn't do anything STUPID, but yeah, there are somethings in my past I'd much rather not discuss with my now husband... ;)
What counts is the present, and thinking about not f'ing up your future.... once you have that mind set, you'll make the right decision.

If you love someone and you KNOW he loves and respects you: enjoy your moment.

And yeah, also: that's good that 'tested the waters' first, I don't know how MISERABLE my life would be if I would have married my ex.... boy oh boy....

[mayflowers]

In my culture (American) it's wise to have relationships before marriage.  Almost everyone here does it.  It's considered normal.

[angelbabies]

i think you need to have more than one partner, you need to learn about relationships befor you find "the one" outherwise it wont work you need to no what it takes, and how it is to be with someone what it feels like to be let down and only then will you no if you realy care about a person! it helps you mature as a person and therfor enter new realionships with maturaty!

[iam1butterfly]

not only is it okay; it's imperative!

[treazzure007]

i couldn't imagine how in the world someone is supposed to know what they like and don't like about men without hanging around them long enough.  dating was necessary.  helped me learn what i liked and didn't like, wanted and didn't want in a husband

[margypops]

maryddn said all you need to know, definatly the way to goi with your life , good luck

[babypooh]

Having more than one relationship before marriage is perfectly fine to me, but sexual relations isn't; everyone has different thoughts on the subject. I'ts up to you :)

[maryddn]

I think I can relate to you. I'm from a different culture as well and was always taught to save myself for my future husband. Let me tell you, it's very difficult to maintain that thinking nowadays. Almost all of my friends had physical relationships as soon as we were in college, and I was very temped many times. When I was around your age, I couldn't stand anymore and ended up having a boyfriend. And I'm glad the only thing  I gave him was my first kiss, which I later regret that I should have saved for my husband as well. It wasn't easy to resist being physical with him, but somehow back in my mind I still felt he wasn't the one, so I broke it off after a year. We were friends after that.  

I met my husband when I was 21 (he was 20), and I could tell he was going to be my husband someday. We finished school, worked hard to pay off student loans, bought our home, and got married 6 years later. We had our first child when I turned 28 and are expecting our second one this summer. I was also his first by the way. We shared the same kind of thoughts, and we couldn't be happier that we have met. Most of my friends now are also married; some to the same partners in college; some are with new partners; 1 guy maybe to his 4th or 5th girl. The important thing is we're happy with our lives and the decisions we made. I never regretted not having many boyfriends or having past physical relationships before my husband, and I'm sure my friends never care to think about it.

My point to you is that don't be too concerned about what is OK or not OK to anyone else but yourself. If you feel so strongly that you only want girls with no past relationships, then go for it. Chances are there maybe girls who believe the same. It doesn't always mean you'll end up happy together, but at least you found what you wanted.

Good luck,
Mary

[drifter0213]

if you want a woman's /man's respect stick to one partner - drifter0213

[RockRose]

majaraha,  you keep asking this question repeatedly.

No,  from your upbringing,  I don't think it would be okay for you.   I have a dear friend who  had an arranged marriage,  and it worked out great for her - they are going on 25 year anniversary.

If you don't agree with it,  get your family to arrange a marriage.  If you DO agree with having relationships and choosing your own partner after several selections,  do that.

Stop beating yourself up and everyone else about whether this is acceptable.  It's acceptable to mainstream America,  it's not acceptable to your heritage.  You have to decide for yourself.

Decide for yourself.

[momagain59]

Thank God I did not marry the first person I dated. What was I thinking?

[heatherlynn22]

of course having more then one bf/gf before marriage is ok. what if you married the first person you dated...after a while you found out you really didn't like them...then your sol.

i think i had MAYBE 2/3 "serious" relationships before dh and i got married. i knew him when we were kids so when we started dating we got pretty serious pretty quick. we were engaged after a year and married a year after that. now we're coming up on our 1 yr anniversary and have 2 wonderful little boys.

[GRose]

I think it is wise to explore your options before settling down. I am not referring to sexual relationships just relationships in general. I think it can be a foolish decision to marry the first person you date, how do you know they are what you want if you don't know what else is out there.

[imanaddict]

Nevermind...I didn't see the poll before I left that comment..LOL!

[imanaddict]

Are you talking about sexual relations or relationships??