im back

[shyguy1080]

Hey everyone im back. Its link aka shyguy. Something went wrong with my account so i had to make a new one. Anyway, wow alot to respond too,lol

RockRose- No i dont go after super model women.. I know they are totally out of my league. I been rejected alot by average women. Why cant i not go after a women who i find somewhat attracted too?

Mami- I talked to my friend today, who gives great advice on dating and he said something interesting, almost the same as you.. He said if u were to put a good looking guy infrot of alot of women to judge, the ladies would have mixed answers on if he's good looking or not, while viceversa if a good looking female was there, it be alot different. I guess its true.. Women are not as visual as men are. And, im starting to be convinced that it really is all how a guy acts.. Im starting to feel good about approaching a woman. Im tired of this shy, scared feeling.. I have learned a lesson with the last girl, dont joke around with someone you dont know,lol. Everyone here has been awsome.. I love this forum.. I guess there still is hope for me :)

[RockRose]

Shyguy,  I'm going to shoot straight from the hip.  There are things about your profile that are appealing,  and things that are the kiss of death on POF.  

The main pic is great.  Unless you have photos of you in groups or doing something very funny or interesting,  take all the rest off.  They are pictures you took of yourself alone in your apartment.  Not appealing.  The one smiling headshot is sufficient.  The rest makes you look a bit lonely and preoccupied with your expressions.

In your description,  remove everything that comes after "and I work an average of 42 hours a week as well"  and before "I'd love to hear from you".  It's all off putting,  judgmental and puts a lot of pressure on a woman to measure up.  It is not welcoming in the slightest,  and frankly reads like a long history of bad relationships and a jaded guy.    Close with let's meet for "coffee,  or lunch,  or dinner,  or to go kite flying . . . "

The profile as you have it will not get any responses.    You appear prickly and lonely.

This is from my heart,  not meant to hurt you,  just to give you a real heads up to what you're doing.

[shyguy1080]

LOL, Nice. Well put, Pens. Ok so i'll approach a woman.. I guess i just don't know what to say.. Yea i'll say hi,. but what else? I just dont want to make her feel awkward..And i guess the big reason why i don't feel attractive is because of the lack of sucess on xxxxxxxxxxxx.xxx.. I made a good profile, and got smiling pics but still no sucess.. So i just assume my looks arent cutting it.. Yea i know i been told pof isnt a good site.. ButI hear people do have sucess there.. Two of my friends had luck. Im just wondering what gives..What do those women on that site want? O and i dont message very good looking women, i know they wont go for me.. Those women are usually stuck up anyway.. But i've messaged pretty, average, even not so good looking.. I'd be lucky to get a response..What does it take for a woman to give an average joe like me a shot?

[penswriter]

i have never ever approached a man. if they are interested they can approach me. well...back in the day they could. now...hubby gives them the stink eye, flexes some muscle and scares everyone away. lol.

[Julie359]

Us girls like to be appraoched not to approach the guy.....for me anyway if i have to approach a guy it is desprate and gives me constant doubts, like does he really like me or is it because he thinks i'm up for it and has a sure thing..... so if woman think like me and all my girlfriends do, then your gona have to take charge and take action.  Approach them!!

[shyguy1080]

Yea I will do just that! And you know what? After that fallout with the last girl, I just laughed it off.. I agree, dwelling on stuff is a waste of time. Check this out though, at one of my jobs, alot of girls come in, well not a whole lot considering the economy.. Anyway is it unwise to to complement them? Or if it's ok, what could i say? Basically is hitting on custumers a bad thing to do?

[Judy246]

You approach them! Life is what you make it out to be and goes by quickly, so you go out there and approach the woman of your dreams, if she rejects you, oh well, NEXT, move on to the next. Be yourself, and take a chance in life and women. Don't accept rejection as an attack on your appearance or the "self". You don't know why they rejected you, but don't dwell on it and move on to the next. You might be pleasantly surprised to have one of those ladies that you hand picked, say, "Yes, I'd love to have lunch (or whatever) with you1"....just do it! ....one day, you will be back here and say, "Thanks ladies!"