Hi, I’ll get straight to the point. When I make eye contact with strangers or people of authority (managers, professors, officers, etc.) my eyes will immediately after one or two seconds start to slightly begin to vibrate.
Background: I come from a single parent household. I believe that is where my social anxiety comes from. As a child I was left at home a lot because of my maturity. My mother worked two jobs (and more..) just to be able to pay rent and fill our fridge. I was very loved as a child by my mother. She just worked a lot and that’s not something she wanted to do but had to of course. Our family consist of 4 people. Two siblings and me. My siblings are 17-20 years older than me. So, while they had their own families and only visited on holidays, I was being raised by my mom alone. The friends I kept were from school. I only really had one best friend growing up (1-6 grade). That was only because my mom trusted their dad enough to watches while she worked.
Now/ ADULT: I’m now very socially anxious. I have a normal personality but when I talk to strangers or make eye contact with people who make me naturally nervous as is, I just freak out completely on the inside and it’s now starting to show on the outside in ways I can’t control now.
When I make eye contact: my eyes will begin to slightly vibrate. Think of.. hmm.. think of holding up your hand horizontally and purposely vibrating it. As fast as you can. If you know what I’m talking about, that’s exactly how my eye FEELS. I was once asked, in a interview, why my eyes were vibrating “softly”. I didn’t know at the time people could see the movement... that’s when I became aware this was not normal. This is something that is possibly unique to me and what’s going on inside and it’s scary... concerning..
why is my anxiety becoming worse?
is it age related? (I am 21)
irreversible?
By medication or social therapy and growth?
Medical:
— Slightly anemic. Iron makes me veerry nauseous and my doctor said my body will get used to them after daily usage (basically to just stick it out and stop whining). It didn’t improve so I stopped taking them. I try to get it in my diet whenever I can but I don’t sit around and eat steaks all day. You know?
- do you have any suggestions for me and/or alternative vits/probiotics/anything for anemia?
— I have trouble conceiving. I once had menorrhagia for three months straight one year ago. I have been diagnosed with slight anemia ever since.
— I have memory loss problems now.. last 2 years; I think?.. With my own research and working with professionals when I can through the years, I have been told that it is possible my anxiety and stress has caused mild memory loss. It started by forgetting how to get to the mall from my moms old house and now it’s to the point where I will have my phone in my hand, go to the bathroom and set it down, I come out of the bathroom, wash some dishes and then start destroying my living room looking for that silly phone that was found in the laundry basket (real story). No memory of touching laundry what’s so ever...... my boyfriend calls me out on it a lot. “You forget so many important things that most people would always keep their eyes on— like your car keys” (can u guess what I lost that day? Yup.) however, no, I have never been treated or diagnosed with anything for this or had my brain scanned.. My doctor never expressed too much concern for it. “If you manage your stress, you’ll improve your memory.” sounds simple enough (yeah right..)
— Migraines and headaches. @least Once a week.
— ADHD. I think I grew into a more ADD state now that I’m older. But I’ve been told more girls develop ADD than boys for some reason so I guess it’s a normal change.
I do not take medication. I wouldn’t mind starting but it will probably worsen my symptoms by making me more seclusive rather than more socially comfortable.. right?
ADHD/ADD medication suggestions for the future? Alternatives?
I tried to highlight my questions within the BIG question.. (WHY DO MY EYES SHAKE?? HOW CAN I CONTROL IT?? IS THIS A NORMAL NERVOUSNESS SYMPTOM?). I hope we can all pitch in what we know and try to find out some key points that I can to take note of for myself and bring attention to my doctor(s). Maybe even things to watch out for in the future waaay waaay on. Like Alzheimer’s and such.
Thank you for taking the time to read about my problems.. I appreciate your experience and insight a ton.
And please answer what you wish you to! I know there are a ton of questions overall.