Alcoholic, Living with an Community
A friendly request
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This patient support community is for loved ones of people who drink and are trying to quit for discussions relating to abuse, behavioral issues, caring for yourself, counseling, divorce and separation, enabling, guilt, and when to get medical help.

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A friendly request

D (my foster father) is an abusive alcoholic.  He is physically and emotionally abusive.  Basically I run my life around the my "family".  I can't be there at night because that's when he drinks.  There are other instances that I have to avoid.  I'm sick of it.  I've been beaten since I was a little girl.  I'm currently 24 going on 25 in February and I still get punched in the face.  What have I done about it?  Nothing except leave and cry my eyes out.  Unfortunately some people don't change and precautions have to be made.  I'm just sick and tired of living my life around everyone else's.  Why can't I get a break?  I've gone to AA and ALANON meetings before, but it runs on time, so not everyone gets to say something.  I talk to my social worker about it, but sometimes it's just not enough.  I know this is lame, but would anyone want to be friends so I don't feel so alone?
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6 Comments Post a Comment
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203342_tn?1328740807
We're all here for support. I'm glad you came, welcome!

It's never ok to for anyone to abuse another, no matter who they are or what addiction or illness they suffer from. If I were you, I'd contact a women's shelter and move out of that home as quickly as possible. The women's shelter can help you get back on your feet and give you resources to help. You need to get out of that toxic environment as soon as possible.

Keep in touch and let us know how you are doing. Take care of yourself. You deserve that!
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Avatar_f_tn
R U SOBER? the reason i ask because once you r sober for sometime many of these answers will come to you. What you do with them will then become your responsibility.
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1475202_tn?1388955435
I really worry that you or someone else in the house may really be hurt some day. the moment he hits you he has broken the law. A call to the police will surely ruin his night and protect you. A restraining order may be filed. Do you have any place else you can go? You really need to get completly away from that environment. I'm really surprised you haven't heard this advise before. You really need more than a friend. Try not to feel so scared, do the best you can to get away from this guy. Do you have anyone that can help you do this?
Randy
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13167_tn?1327197724
You're 24 years old.  You don't need to be in foster care anymore,   or living with your former foster care family.  

Do you work?  Can you save up a little money and move out?   I would think the foster care system would have had some method for you to move out when you were 18 or 19.  

Can you still contact the foster care system or your social worker to realize there is a way out of this mess?
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Avatar_m_tn
It's never ok to for anyone to abuse another, no matter who they are or what addiction or illness they suffer from. If I were you, I'd contact a women's shelter and move out of that home as quickly as possible. The women's shelter can help you get back on your feet and give you resources to help. You need to get out of that toxic environment as soon as possible.
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1666434_tn?1325265950
I just was reading over your post and wanted to touch base with you to see how things were going and see if your situation ever changed?  Please do update us.
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