Life

[Dane74]

Hi all, I am pulling myself up from my slump.  After my relapse, i became very depressed and anxious to say the least.  I am doing all the nessary things i need to do to take control over the situation.  I went to my primary care dr, confessed to him about my love affair for the pills told him about my relapse and wow, the saying goes"the truth shall set you free"!!  Well i felt better getting that off my chest, and as a result i was put on an anti depressant, i am not liking this idea but i do believe its necessary.  So, hopefully in 2 weeks i will notice some improvement.  I am currently on day 8 clean now, i would have been around 80, but its time to forget that mark and just work from day 8.  I cannot begin to stress the importance of AFTERCARE, i found an addiction therapist, she is a blessing, and i see her once a week.  Not going to lie, after one hour in that session, i walk out of there drained.  We all use or used for a reason, basically to escape reality, well, now i am in the learning stages of coping.  The only way  i know how to cope is to take a pill so i really look forward to embracing life and see what its all about clean and sober.  YES, its scary, but its a fact of life.  

[Dane74]

Thank you tramhater!    He put me on Lexapro the lowest dose because he said i am a virgin to SSRI's...:-)   Another aftercare?  Suggestions?

Thank you for all your help

[atthebeach]

hey dana,
i am so happy for you that you are feeling better. there is no condemnation. dont believe the lies of the enemy. another suggestion for aftercare. you dont want to go to na/aa cause of your small town and might see someone. well if they are there, they are seeking help too.
i am giving you the link for celebrate recovery, it is christian based.
it isnt only for substance abuse, check it out and see what you think.
great job on seeing the therapist. i love therapy. i think everyone can benefit from it. substance abuse or not. there are issues everyday that are trying and that cause stress. it is great to have an unbiased outlet.
i hope you can find a meeting near you.

http://www.celebraterecovery.com/?page_id=118

sending hugs.continued blessings and love

debbie

[gnarly_1]

HI Dane so happy to see you working your way out of your depression im bipolar and know all about them and failur will send me for a loop....I truly think the relaps is more of a mental mindscrew then anything else not to say using is any good but its what it does to you mentally I really struggled to get off the methadone and blew my taper ....my so perfictly planed taper some nights I should have dosed at 20 I would take 100 just to get the dope sick off me only to feel completely defeated the next day I never thought I would be free and what you say we al use for a reason ......your rifght its to escape something ....sometimes we dont even know what its so buried your going to be fine congrats on 8 days of the rest of your life......Gnarly

[dominosarah]

I always thought that using was the addiction, little did i know that using was only a symptom.  That was a huge "aha" moment for me.  Keeping working with your therapist as it seems you have a good one!  I think the idea of the AD med is good too.  Getting over this hump is important and being depressed can really keep a person down.  

Congrats on those 8 days and for fessin up to the doctor!!!  Great job!!    sara

[tavia14]

Hi Dane, Loved reading your post! You are beyond and inspiration!!! These are all the things I need to do! The only thing I am afraid of is the anti-depress pills ( for me) but I am so depressed that I think it may be an OK thing. My new doc is a depression specialist so if I can ever get in to see her we will let her be the judge! Anyway this isn't about me its about you and you are doing an amazing job jumping into your recovery! Yay! Keep strong you are helping me more than you will ever know! Thank you!

[vicki595]

Hi Kiddo!

You'll be fine!  Just one foot in front of the other. Aftercare is so many things! It's a therapist or group meetings etc...but it's also about changing things up! Changing routines,old habits,morning rituals (very important)eating "breakfast" at dinnertime...getting dressed up for no reason...pearls and vacuuming?? Yes and yes!!  A new lipstick; a new hair color(you know who you are!) a new book; a new friend. It's endless!!

It's not unusual to be depressed. Many of us were depressed FIRST and used pills to feel better!  

What kind of exercise can you do that won't hurt your leg? Walking...swimming??   You'll feel better!!

Keep writing it all down!!   xoxox