what a hard day

[bama88]

Today was my first true day of detox I'm not going to call it withdrawals. Withdraws are when your out and waiting for that next pill. I don't know how I made it but I did. I even watched my husband take four tabs a soma and a morphine.  That was so hard. If hills pills 'would of accident fell in.my mouth'. I would have sighed in delight. But nope I stuck it out.  It has been a rollercoaster of.emotions with the toilet the star of the day. Imodium didn't work for me. But I did have to take a benzo to calm my nerves. I was so mean..bouncing around like a pinball and wow my bones hurt. I even managed to work on.cleaning my room. I haven't done that in months. I haven't ever been one day clean in over five years. Thanks for giving me strength to do this.

[gnarly_1]

HI been following your post so far so good just be careful with the benzos
this is a battle one one day at a time your probably not going to feel any worst then you do although the sleep deprivation will make it seam worst hang in there if you believe in God prayer helps got me to where im at
any ways just wanted to encourage you to keep pushing forward dont take your eyes off the prize it is so so worth it not being chained to a pill bottle
just remember YOU CAN DO THIS ....good luck and God bless......Gnarly  

[bama88]

What a day. I shouldn't have took that nap. I can't sleep. I can't sleep. Hanging out with all of you has so helped. I want to get high so bad. But I've made it two days. I wish I could eat. Everything keeps coming up. I wish I would have never ever taken one pain pill. My legs hurt so bad i can't stand it. If I can make it thru tomorrow. I should have tapered..my whole body is shocked. I need some candy to sweeten me up lol.

[GA_need_help]

Hi,
A big hug to you! This is so hard! I want you to know I am doing a detox/taper with Opana ER now. This is the hardest thing I have ever been through.  We are in this together, and perhaps 2 more people that posted are also.  I am praying for you.  We have little girls we love, but they can absolutely be trying.  A better life is to come.  
Marie

[bama88]

I don't know about that. We've talked about this a lot. I knew he went somewhere bad today. He loves loves loves them valuim. He is not on the planet. He isn't ready to let go of his pills. He still has issues about his car wreck. I feel like throwing him out. I can't take his accusing ways. I just want to be comfortably numb and listen to pink flyod. Then tomorrow he will.say he is sorry blah blah blah. Well I say f*** his sorry. I also want to argue with him but that will take to much energy.

[Bkitty]

Oh noooo!! Im so sorry! Today must be a bad day for spouses,,mine is in the doghouse too. Im so proud of you today! You came this far and pulled thru and didnt cave. Esp with a hubby with pills! Now that is courage and stregnth. When he see's how well you are doing,,im willing to bet he is next! So proud!

[bama88]

It was extremely hard not to use. I want to just numb up and get rid of all my feelings. I never ever been into the benzoo kick it makes me go right to sleep. I know the accusations are his disease talking and you can't reason with a drug.but still.and he does this around our girl. I want all my oxys back out of his precious safe. I want to use so bad. I know that a pill is not the solution.