Is my child a sociopath?

[tonya623]

My son is 10 years old and for as long as I can remember we have been having issues with his behavior.  In the beginning it was stealing little things like snack cakes and pens off my desk and it progressed to stealing bigger things like my husbands watch.  Added to this he lies almost constantly, sneaks around and is always making up stories to see if he can trick someone into believing him.  We took all of that in stride and tried to believe that he was a normal child with behavior problems. We tried postive and negative reinforcement, time-outs, grounding, taking things away and just about everything else at one time or another.  We even moved to another state to give him a new start in a new school, with new friends and in a house with his own room instead of in a tiny apartment but things just got worse and worse.  

Last year he was having problems in school and nearly failed. He has already taken first grade twice and second grade twice and he nearly had to take second grade for a third time because he didnt want to do the work. Not because he can't or because he is distracted but because he thinks his teachers are too stupid to teach him anything. This year he has been better but I think it is because he has tricked the teacher into giving him most of the answers on his work and making things very easy on him because he is so small and she feels that he is being mistreated at home.  They even called child services because of the stories that he told them.

We also found out that he has been peeing in his room. At first he was peeing on the clothes in his laundry basket and then he began peeing in the corners and in his clothes depending on how badly the need was. His reason for this is alternately that he is trying to teach me a lesson and that I should let him wander the house and do whatever he wants and that it is his room and he should be allowed to do anything he wants in there even pee.

When we realized that he was peeing in his room we took him to a mental hospital for inpatient treatment and they kept him for 8 days before releasing him.  I was told that they could not keep him there because he was not a danger to anyone and besides he promised not to pee and would follow all the rules ect.  That only lasted a few hours after he got home and he was peeing again.  We moved him out of his room and into the living room so that he wouldnt have the opportunity to do it anymore and we thought that was the end of that until he tried to starve our ferrets by pretending to feed them but not actually doing it.  His reason was that he was tired of them and wanted to see how long it would take them to die.  I sat him down to talk about this and he told me that he was also planning to kill the cat, myself and my 10 month old because he was also tired of us.  I took him back to the mental hospital where they kept him for 24 days with absolutely no improvement.  This time they released him because he said that he no longer planned to kill anyone and was all better.  The couselor suggested that I send him to a boys camp because even though he said he was better and they were sending him home they did not feel that he was really better.

So here we are trying to decide what we should do with our son.  He is 10 years old and the size of an 8 year old, has mild Cerebral palsy and needs shots in order to grow.  If I send him to this camp he will not get the chance to grow normally and wont get all the treatment for his CP. Neither of which will matter if he doesnt get the mental help he needs.  I hate the idea of sending my son away because I am his mother and feel that I should be the best thing for him.  The problem is that he wants to kill me and thinks that it is okay if he does.  He does not express remorse for anything that he has done and never has, is extremely maniputlative and is not affected by punishments or consequences of any kind because he feels that they are only temporary and do not matter.  I am nearly convinced that he is a sociopath but he is SO manipulative that the doctors havent been able to see the real child and instead see the fake one that he is so good at portraying.  What can I do in this situation?

[KnLForever]

thank you for all the info you have giving me,im going to look into it i have no choice. i wish there was more that could be done to save her but i know in heart there isnt and this really is my last hope for her... as much as love her i have to do what is best for my other kids and our family...

[nursegirl6572]

Have you looked into one of those residential programs for troubled children and children with major behavioral problems?  I think that may be a valid option perhaps?

Here are a few links I found, maybe it wouldn't hurt to browse through them and see what your options are.  I think she clearly needs an INTENSIVE program, somewhere she can be monitored 24/7.

http://www.inspirationsyouth.com/treatments/teen-behavioral-treatment/

http://www.nationalyouth.com/residentialtreatment.html

http://www.teenswithproblems.com/facilities.html#facilities

Those are just a few, if you do a search, you can find a bunch.  I think that may be an option for you.  You have to protect your family, and it sounds like there is real danger involved with the situation as it is now.  I'm so sorry you're in this position.  I REALLY hope you find a way to get her the help she needs.  

[KnLForever]

the psychiatrist put her on lithium when she was 13 she has also been on in the past Seroquel,Risperdal those are just a few of the meds the drs have put her on over the course of about 8 years.. the med she is on now is zoloft. but non of them seem to work on her,a couple of them seem to have worked maybe a week or so then they just stopped working.like i said i just dont know what to do anymore...she is getting worse and its not just lies and stealing anymore she also cuts herself and for the life of me cant understand why she  does that. she also says that voices in her head tell her to do these things and she swears that she talks to ghost and she can see them. to tell you the truth it scares the wits out of me. im not sure what to make of this anymore. i do love her and all i want is what is best for her but at the same time she scares me because she goes into the rages and she lashes out and she doesnt care who she hurts she goes after me and my oldest son the most... she pull knives on us and throws things at us breaks things..she more then once has tried to kill my son...

[Sandman2]

   Hey, I feel for you.  I have a very good friend with an older daughter who is going through a much worse phase.  All I could tell him was to love her.
   Medication wise - they all do work.  Even if you have no problems they will do something to you.  A good psyc will take what the medication is doing and then adjust from there because what the med is doing to the person is an example of how it is working and then how it should be adjusted.  Hopefully, you have been dealing with a psychiatrist or someone else in that specialty field?  And Lithium is heavy duty stuff (I can see the need based on what you say), but hopefully that was when she was much older.   Were any meds tried between say 7 and 12?  

[KnLForever]

and thank u guys for the support

[KnLForever]

sorry it took me so long to reply i had to cook dinner and stuff.... my daughter has been on zoloft, lithium a few others that i cant remember right off the top of my head... none of the meds worked... the lithium at first made her stare off into space then it just stopped and it seems like she got worse...