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i got arrested today......
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i got arrested today......

please bear with me, this is long.
we let our daughter come back home again last sat. 8/18. with the promise she would go to meetings,counseling,she got a job, signed up for school, called an outpatient rehab. got an appt. for believe this. october 1st.
she stayed home a few days went to church with us, went to a couple meetings. friday she starting acting irrational, argumentative, yelling,screaming,crying, accusing us of not loving her or caring for her.

she got a settlement check on 8/1st for a dog bite she got when she was 10 yrs. old. every year for the past 4 years she has gotten money on 8/1 about $14,000 each year. for 3 years the money was always gone in one month for her habit. this year dont worry mom, this the longest i have been clean, she did pay for a car,ins,a phone,school, lawyer, but still had $8000 left. when i asked her last fri about the money and wanted to see a bank receipt she flipped out.
sat she was arguing, i try so hard not to argue back, i just sit there and get accused of not caring and being a stone face. she has called me such horrible names. today we said we wanted to go somewhere a park, canoeing did she want to come. she said i have a stomach ache. i was suspicious. she was texting people. she was crying, saying she was sorry do we think she wants to be like this. we told her to call a program and go away. we said she doesnt have any coping skills, no self control.  my 2 young sons, 12 & 14 hear all this craziness.
she said i am going to go get high. i took her keys and said no she couldnt leave to go get high.

i walked up the street, she followed me screaming, i stole her keys, mind you this is from her who has stolen,money,jewelry and i never called the police.
i told her to go cool down, she didnt need to leave right then, i was scared for her to leave. well she called the police and so did some of the neighbors, she was screaming up the street at all the cars going by that she needed help. so 3 cop cars, 6 cops at my house. they saw me up the street i got in their car. no problem. i was calm, told them i was concerned because my daughter was going to get high and i was scared for her life.i said i wanted to press charges because she scratched my chest so bad trying to get the keys i had in my shirt. if we arrest her she will get out. do you want us to take her to get evaulated at the hospital and she will detox will be there for 72 hrs. i said wow she agreed to that yes ok perfect.
mam she is 21 you cant take her keys. go get the keys i said ok so i started to walk up the road ( i had put them in a bush).
i asked if i could walk by myself. the one cop with me said no i said ok. i said i will give her the keys and then if she gets in an accident or dies she will be just another statistic. he said yep thats right. i said you dont care about our family, he said lady your right, i dont. i said we are just part of your 8 hr. swift. he freaked out. put his finger to my nose and said lady you are f @$&ing pissing me off. i said please get your finger out of my face. he threw me to the ground, said i was resisting arrest. i started screaming my husband came running, he was smashing my face in the ground, twisiting my arms, put the cuffs on me so tight my wrists are all swollen and black and blue, my back is killing me, i have a black and blue swollen eye. i got beat up and had excessive force against me for saying he didnt care about my family.
in the cop car he said i cursed at him and used the exact words he said to me. i was in the cell for 5 hrs. he charged me with assaulting an officer, said i cursed at him and put my hands on him, refused to get the "stolen property, resisted arrest,and caused bodily harm to an officer of the law.
i am in shock. i am a 55 yr. old christian woman, who doesnt curse,lie, have never been arrested, dont even get parking tickets and he is charging me with 4 charges, 2 felonys.

this addiction has brought me,my sons,daughter,husband to such insanity. to so much heartache. they let her out of the hospital sooner than i got our of jail. we threw her things outside and told her not to come back.
i took a few xanax. my body is so sore i am in shock about the things that transpired today.
please pray for us that my daughter goes to a rehab, that the LORD spares her life, that the judge will drop some of these ridiculous charges. i have to get a lawyer now.
debbie
52 Comments Post a Comment
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1235186_tn?1339127464
i forgot to say i cant believe he lied so much. he could say and write down whatever he wantson his report, all lies. the LORD is my witness, i know what happened. nothing that he said did. he actually said one thing when he arrested me, in the car and then wrote something different on the report.
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406584_tn?1399591666
Oh Debbie my Prayers are going up right now as I type and tonight I will be sending one special.. I'm so sorry to read all this has happened.. You should never put up with being cursed at disrespected.. You have been too kind.. Please think of Yourself your Husband and Younger children.. If this did not bring your daughter to her knees you are going to have to let it go.. I can not guarantee what will happen with her but the Creator watches after us.. Lord knows I have given him many chances to call me home.. Yes do get a layer I would Believe they would drop some of these charges. that cop sounds like a Brut a Jerk and I'm sorry but right now your daughter is not far away.. she needs to grow up. I'm sorry I'm so forward.. You reach out to so many I read your kindness all the time and Yet you live like this. It is unacceptable for you and your family.. I hope you have found your bottom mom I really do You do not deserve this.. I send you gentle warm hugs and prayers Debbie.. warmly lesa
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406584_tn?1399591666
yep that sounds like a cop in a bad mood.. ot does not matter who you are. what a Jerk.. I'm Shocked with you that you went thru this...
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3177755_tn?1344457400
Listen, I have been a cop for 11+ years ...I want to apologize for his actions....I know for a fact you CAN take the keys from someone without their consent if u feel they are going to harm themself....with that being said I would advise you to contact that agency and ask to speak to the Internal Affairs division and explain everything that happened ...he should have had to have his camera running the entire time...if he did act this way then you need to report him ..
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406584_tn?1399591666
I think Phillip gave you excellent advice. Bit I think I would still retain a lawyer. Gosh I'm so sorry this happened to you It is just unimaginable.
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495284_tn?1333897642
I am so sorry to read this Deb.  I hope you are feeling better soon.  Did you take pics of your injuries?  Dont let this cop get by with this.  Take it to a higher up just as Phillip said.

As for your daughter.....I hope this was your bottom with her.

We all know you are a wonderful caring woman my friend.  Sending you gentle hugs and comfort~~sara
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1235186_tn?1339127464
thank you. i have total respect for the police. i would never even think about assaulting (touching) him he said i poked him in the chest 2 times and said " f @#$ you, you dont care about my family" i did say he didnt care about my family, he added the curse words. the entire 5 hrs i was in the cell i could hear all the officers talking,laughing, dropping the f bomb every other word. i guess it goes with the territory. there were six officers at my home, all the other ones were so nice. it was only he & i that went to get the keys. the crusier was facing in the opposite direction. we had walked a couple of houses away no one else saw. it is cops like him that give the good ones a bad name. i think someone pooped on his corn flakes this morning,.
they didnt even give me a bail, i wasnt a threat,a flight risk,  duh, no kidding. i asked one of the officers who came to the cell if i could look at my eye i couldnt see out of it and it was killing me. he said ok the i will take you to the bathroom. i asked where "he" (the officer  who arrested me) was i said i dont want to see him, he is in the office. as soon as i walked out he was there. in the bathroom i asked the other officer what i was being charged with an he said i assaulted me, i said what he stuck his finger in my face and cursed at me. "he " comes running out of the office and said thats it i am putting bail on her.
2 mins later when i was back in the cell, the same nice officer who was also at my house, said no there is no bail.
i wonder if he had already done things like this before?
why accuse me of such horrible felonys?
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Avatar_f_tn
Oh Deb...this is a nightmare and I'm sure you're just shaken by this!

Phillip is right, of course, and in addition have your husband take some pictures of the injuries.

We are told ALL THE TIME to take the keys from someone who is not fit to drive and she wasn't. If she had threatened to go get drunk you would take them also! I would have done the same thing...

That cop has some issues and I think you should get a lawyer Deb. I'm sure those charges will be dropped because there's no evidence!

I'm so sorry for you...you didn't deserve this by a long shot. It's criminal!!  I hope  you can relax tonight and keep talking when you can. It will help and very soon this will get straightened out and you'll be vindicated.
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1235186_tn?1339127464
@and he said i assaulted him.
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480448_tn?1403547723
OMG,.  I don't "know" you, but I'm, horrified by your story.  You daughter is responsible for this madness, and as hard as it is, you need to be 100% done.  I've seen some of your posts about how much you've done for her...this is just it.  Arrested?  Assaulted by the police?  No honey...you be DONE with her.  I'm seething with anger for you and I don't even know you.

Get a good lawyer and fight fight fight.  This cop needs investigated.  You could be looking at a civil suit down the line, if you can prove what he did.  Unreal.  The system ***** most times.  Damn.

I'm just SO sorry you went through that.  What a nightmare.  I hope your daughter realizes what happened.  I hope you find the strength to break ties.  You cannot let her, daughter or not...affect your life to this kind of extreme.  It's bull pucky!

You're in my thoughts and my prayers.
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3177755_tn?1344457400
It doesn't matter weather you cussed him or not...we as cops are taught to deal with people that are upset...people do not call the police when they are having a good day ...we see people usually when they are at their worst...regardless of which way his car was facing he has on a body microphone...it should clear u of his allegations ....you're not the first person to catch a cop when he has a bad day...it isn't right but it happens...DO NOT GIVE UP ON YOUR DAUGHTER ....when I was younger my parents never gave up on me and it finally paid off and I turned a corner....she will too
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So sorry about you ordeal. Makes me extremley sad. Reminds me of the terrible situations that I have put my mom through. Praying for you and your entire family.
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1720423_tn?1390188668
I am so sorry to hear this. You were so kind to me last year, as you are to everyone. I will pray for you & your family.
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2083449_tn?1381358308
Oh Debbie, this just makes me sick to read! Try to calm yourself! Get a notebook and write everything down, from the beginning! Including what went on with your daughter before the cops were called! Include the approx times! Yes, take pictures of all injuries and bruises! Get a lawyer! Make sure they check to see if the cops had some kind of video or audio recording of the incident, like a dash-cam or something! Also, have the lawyer check to see if the Cop has any prior incidences, complaints, or disciplinary action for police brutality or excessive force! (this is probably not the first time he has done something like this) Try to see if there was any witnesses to the event (or in my opinion, the assault to you)!

Take care of yourself! Get medical treatment for your injuries (again, more documentation). Consider talking to a Counselor, Therapist, or maybe someone from your Church!

I'm so sorry this has happened! I'm praying for you and your daughter! I also hope that this incident will be her bottom! Please keep posting and update us on what happens! You have so much love and support here! Take care Debbie, we are here for you!
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1810386_tn?1405553177
Hi Debbie,

My Prays go out to you. They say that the lord never gives us anything we cannot handle. Things are tough and we are all here to support you though this.

Take care of yourself *hugs*  
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Avatar_f_tn
Good Lord, This is wrong on sooo many levels. Something just doesn't sound right. That cop is off his rocker and mentally unstable. Sonrissa gave you excellent advice. Chances are this incident isn't this officers first offense. My heart breaks for you. On top of worrying for your daughter, you now are faced with this nonsense. Let your daughter deal with her own issues right now, you have to deal with the wake of her choices after all .I have little doubt these charges will be dropped. A call to the officers superviser is also in order. If you are in a small town, you may need to be diplomatic in your solution to get this resolved. You don't want a bitter officer targeting you around town. Praying now for your daughter, not really qualified to comment there. Hope your sleeping the good sleep now. xx
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2030769_tn?1343651274
i don't know you in real life, but i can't even imagine you having to sit in a jail cell:(  I would report this, somehow.  That was completely unacceptable behavior and abuse of power on the police's part.

God will get your through this.

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186166_tn?1385262982
this story is just not right...so sad.

i've had to call the police to my daughter in law a couple of times.  basically the same story...her trying to leave and go get high and we've taken her keys.

i have to say that we have been soooo fortunate to have had responders that were very caring and understanding.  even though we could not "stop her" legally (of age and the car was in her name)...the police spent a lot of time talking to HER...trying to help her see what she could be loosing, her daughter.

sorry you got that "one bad apple".  as advised above...call attention to the inappropriate behavior shown by the person YOU called to help.  his attitude is unacceptable ! ! !
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3185671_tn?1344782780
((Deb)))
I just want to take you in my arms and hug you tight. I am so very sorry you had to go thru this. You have gotten such excellent advice from so many here all I can do is agree with them all. Fight this. This was not right. As for your daughter...reading everything, the fighting, crying, arguing,  all of it..I can relate to and can absolutely see something like this happening to me as well. In fact, Saturday night I took my daughters keys frm her . Difference is the car is in our name.
Much, much love and strength to you.
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im am so mad for u. i havnt been to verbal on this site but i always read ur posts and you try to help every1 this is not right. i want that cop to get in trouble he was supposed to help he acually sounds like some of us when were out of drugs lol i think that might b a possiblity cuz normally officers dont protect the addict maybe he got where she was coming from. just a thought. officers are not aboove addiction either
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1436598_tn?1332900133
DEFINITELY take everyone's advice: document injuries and get a lawyer ASAP.  After the past 18 months dealing with the justice system, I can say that most of it doesn't make any sense in how it operates.  My situation was different than yours in that the police were professional, it was when it hit the courts that everything went sideways, but make sure your rights are protected.  Prosecutors are paid to convict, not administer justice.  

I don't want to scare you, most or all of the charges will probably be dropped but you need to be proactive.  You so don't deserve any of this.  Take care of yourself and I will be thinking of you.  Sending a hug your way.
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2083449_tn?1381358308
How are things going today, Debbie?? Thinking and praying for you! Please let us know!
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3149845_tn?1386354841
Hi Debbie, just to share with you that my sister is going through the same with her 21 your old son. Same, with the police, drugs, running and screaming and she, as you, ready to do anything to put this behind her. She is also from a good Christian family with husband and 2 sons and one daughter, same as you. She called me (im the big brother) for help and had the troubled boy move here to florida with me to get him away from her as was causing a big mess for her other children as well. After 2 month with me and my wife, the same started again but now with us as the victims. I ended up chasing him up the street (same as you) at night and kicked him out the next day. With no where else for him turn to he drove to texas to be with some friends he met on the internet but now that has failed as well as his these friends kicked him out as well. Long story short, just to keep him away from his home in new england and away from the family, my sister flew to texas and rented him an apt and pays the rent,  helped get him a parttime job and sends him some money to help. She is doing all this just to keep him away. What i concluded from all of this is that we are the victims of these out of control children. They have the power over us by making us worry about their welfare and use this to get more power. It will be near impossible to change this behavior without some grand event happening, probably on the negetive side. These children are only acting out of control to get what they want from us and the drugs they take make them justify what they are doing. Better they live by themselves as better to destroy themselves than the entire family
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1235186_tn?1339127464
hi everyone thank you for your thoughts and prayers. it really is helping.

the lunacy and seriousness of this is crippling me. i dont have insurance so i dont want to go to the hospital and then be strapped with thousands of $ of bills. i truly feel like i was in a boxing match and i definitely lost the physical fight. BUT.........my hope continues to be in the LORD.

Ephesians 6:12
King James Version (KJV)

12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

there is a spiritual battle going on for my daughters soul, the devil will not win. i stand on the word on GOD. the devil will be defeated.

i have spoken with a lawyer, sadly my family has had to use him many other times in regards to drug issues. he is gathering information for me and speaking with the proper authorities.he is a really great guy, honest and very helpful always. as soon as i texted him this morning he got right back to me and made phone calls.
he said the police  were called here to disfuse  and help the situation and that one cop made it  a whole lot worse.

thank the LORD my 12 yr old has a scheduled counseling appt on mondays at 4 and my 14 yr old goes on thurs. they will certainly have alot to talk about this week. we need peace,comfort and healing in our family.

i appreciate everyones support and prayers . it truly means alot.
please continue to hold us up and pray that these charges are dropped or at least greatly reduced.
with love and gratitude
debbie
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1436598_tn?1332900133
I understand about going to the hospital.  I have insurance but I have a 5K deductible so I might as well not have any lol.  I went to my PCP.  They can check everything out and also provide a layer of documentation.  If they strongly feel you need specific tests you can decide what to do at that time. Mine made sure that nothing was broken around my eye, checked my hearing and throat for damage, and did a general check of other bruises and scrapes.

Whatever you decide, at least take pictures.  I know you must have so much going on right now in your head.  Take care of yourself!
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2030769_tn?1343651274
gosh i have been thinking about your situation all day today.  I am really mad that this happened to you!  Errr. I know it may be expensive, but does your lawyer think you should go get checked out by a doctor, so you can have documentation?  That 'officer' should not get away with this.  Sending prayers your way.
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PLEASE love your daughter from a distance and for the safety of your other children husband and yourself DO NOT allow her within 300ft of your home or other family members because on top of u possibly being hurt to the point u could have been dead your neighbors can all sign a petition and have u and your family forced out of the neighborhood for multiple disturbances and all u have done was b a GREAT LOVING CONCERNED AND CARING MOTHER who has been dealt a bad hand right now but i can assure u GOD is going to carry u threw all of this mess because the devil is a lie and the God we serve shows up aand shows out and baby when he is done your life will be just as your intend for it to b, a walk on the beach. For every bruise u have and for every inch of pain u r going threw that officer is going to have pain heatache. Ten times worst. U just pray for that officer because when Godd gets done with him he will need.
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2107676_tn?1388977459
Oh Debbie
I just read this and my heart goes out to you.  I think if your daughter seeing her mother being injured and arrested doesn't make her stop using, nothing will.  I am so so sorry.
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3060903_tn?1398568723
Debbie, I have followed your posts.  Oh my, I know about the "bad apple" cops and how they instigate these matters. This one had a really short fuse. There are many that have drug and or alcohol problems, high divorce rates etc. and this guy was straight up of his rocker. I'm sure this will not be his first incident brought up to his superiors, perhaps he's had an alcohol problem documented, or a divorce, or extenuating circumstance on his record that could help to prove his instability.  Can you check the neighborhood, or have your lawyer ask the neighbors on your behalf, maybe they heard your daughter screaming and yelling, maybe they saw her scratch you. You need the pastor of your church and maybe many more stand up as character witnessess. Your kids can write afidavits as well as your husband about the disruptions in your home due to your out of control daughter. The way she was acting prior to this incident could well be regarded as her already using dope, she could have been high already. Did they do a drug screen at the hospital when she went? Did your children witness her assaulting you? Did you charge her with assault? She needs to be accountable for her actions. This can be her bottom maybe. Has she any record? I'm sure that these charges will be dropped. Police officers are used to strong language, as you said you heard in the lock up facility.  This is crazy. I can't believe this happened to you. I'm so sorry for the pain you are feeling and the disappointment you must feel about your daughter. I hope that your daughter saw what happened to you. Your husband must be livid. You must have your lawyer go to his superiors and have him charged with something that will stay on his record. How in the world can this happen to a caring mother refusing to let a drug addicted daughter drive on the streets where children play? I'm so sure that these charges will be dropped for you. Please    continue to use your knowledge in the Lord, just as we are, to get you through this. If this doesn't bring your daughter to rehab, I don't know what will. If she is charged with assault it would help her. You will do no more time for this as this is your first offense. Are you working or a stay at home mom? Either way you are a fine upstanding christian family and you will be spared any further humiliation. Not so for this brute, This is excessive force regardless if anyone believes that you may have put your finger in his chest. Swearing is expected on the job.  He WILL suffer for this brutality.  He WILL  get his.  God Bless you Debbie. for all the help and support that you give others. The people here are a testament to this. I'm so sorry for the pain and suffering you must be feeling. Please continue to keep us all informed about this. Everyone will be praying for you and your family. I'm just so very sorry. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
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1235186_tn?1339127464
i cant sleep because of the extra stress this is putting on me.
i know my blood pressure has been highter. i have been crying alot.
emotional wreck.scared and very upset.
i spoke to one of my neighbors, they werent home.so i will talk with another today. i am going to the drs today, my back,neck and arms are all very stiff and sore. my eye is less swollen but i did take pictures of it on sunday.
supposedly my daughter called a rehab. it is a christian one and they are long term 6 to 12 months.
thank you for your continued thoughts,prayers and concern.
it is comforting.
debbie
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617347_tn?1331296681
Debbie, i am truly speechless, this is so unfair :(.... i will for sure PRAY for the best outcome.
pls, follow the good advices you have been given here from all the members, the charges have  to be dropped. There is no way you could have done what the police officer told and you will prove it, one way or the other.

A big, big hug, my friend.

and i really hope that what have happened will make an impact on your daughter for the best !!
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2083449_tn?1381358308
Debbie, try to calm yourself! This will work out for you! I hope your daughter will get herself into this rehab! In the meantime make sure your doctor thoroughly examines you, and documents everything! Have you spoken to an attorney yet? What is the status with the charges?

Take care, sweetie! Make sure you have documented every single  thing you can think of! You have tons of support here! We've got your back girl! Hugs and prayers for strength and calmness!
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1798872_tn?1346168185
Debbie calm down,i read your post and went right to reply-first the police have the right to say any thing they want to-ok?That dont mean its true-ok?Trust me i have seen my share of court rooms (been to prison 5 yes 5 times because of my addictions-not proud but true)(7DUI"S) AND some of my family is in law enfor. with that being said go to courthouse and pull cops work record,yes you can if he acted this way to you chances are he has done it before and it will (hopefully) be on record,for it is public record.Next dont do anything till first court date,be real nice to judge but tell D.A. that if ALL charges are not dropped and he apologizes to you then your loving husband who has lawyer friends will sue the police dept.
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1798872_tn?1346168185
And i can assure you the judge will look into the matter as the D.A. will and see this case for what its worth! Just because the police write on report several things dont mean nothing,trust me been there!! Once i was charged with r/a and the judge said danny has been arrested many times and never resisted arrest -thrown out.But more imporrtant calm down wait till first court date talk to judge.write down any and everything you can think of,o-keep eye on cop they tend to ride by alot and try to scare you,if needed call N.J. law enforcement-not 911.Most important take care of you and family,im sorry you had to go thru this,take it from me she needs help at any cost,sometimes people have to hiy ROCK BOTTOM!! SAD BUT TRUE!!!  GOD BLESS YOU,YALL ARE IN MY PRAYERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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3060903_tn?1398568723
Wow, i'm so glad that you're daughter is looking into a long term rehab, the regular 30 days is usually just to get the police off an addict's back, the fact that she is considering this christian based rehab is a testament to her upbringing. It will take a few months for you to get out from underneath this jam you're in, so I'm praying that your daughter is willing to do her part and commit to this particular rehab. I'm sure that it would take a lot of the sting out of what happened and you deserve to have her prove her love and support for you with a real action plan. I'll pray that she does the right thing for your family. Keep calm, this case will be dropped. Hugs. Liz
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406584_tn?1399591666
Just to let you know I'm thinking of you and Praying for the best outcome for Yourself and your Daughter.... Hugs lesa
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Atthebeach, Prayers and support still going Godspeed your way. This too shall pass. Hold tight and stay strong. xx
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2030769_tn?1343651274
How are you doing today?
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495284_tn?1333897642
How are you doing Deb?
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Avatar_f_tn
Deb,

I was so upset to read this thread.  I regret not seeing it till this morning.  I've been trying to not be so focused on my daughter's problem so I've stopped checking the board so frequently.  

I feel so bad for you.  You really need to detach before she takes you down with her even further.  I would have done the same things you did and been vulnerable to that abusive officer too if I had been in your position, but this is a sign that the situation with your daughter is out of your control.  You need to protect yourself.  I feel your case will be dismissed but really wish you didn't have the added stress and physical/mental pain.  How are you feeling today?
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2083449_tn?1381358308
Hey Debbie! Just thinking of you! How are things going? Please update when you can! Big hugs!
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1235186_tn?1339127464
hi everyone,
i want to really thank you all for your sentiments and kindness. i am feeling better physically, emotionally up and down. many thoughts are running in my head. this court battle could go on for a year.ugh... felony charges have to go to the superior court. my lawyer wants $5000 up front which i dont have at this point. it really stinks. i am trying as best as i can to not worry myself sicker than i already am. i really need to get back to my alanon meetings. this whole thing has just compounded the issues with my daughter.
she is waivering in her decision to go to rehab. says she cant or doesnt want to go for 6 months or so. why not? what else does she have that is more pressing than getting her life together?

my lawyer said i need to work on my defense and not try to prove that the cop is wrong. he said it is very hard to bring charges against them. our family would become a target. he said i know it isnt fair, but thats how it is?
i dont like that at all. i am about fair, the truth,justice and the american way. not being railroaded and defamed. our local paper came out yesterday and there i was in the police blotter with those ridiculous charges listed. my husband nobody reads those. i do and so does alot of people i am sure. what is my defense? a law abiding citizen? thats it......
i have to get people i know to write character references for me.

my sons are very angry at my daughter,none of them want to speak with her or see her.  my 14 yr old said mom its my fault. i said no its not,how could it be? he said i should have knocked the phone out of allys hand.
she has been talking and texting with my husband. she hasnt even asked how i am. it makes me so sad that she has a total disregard for everyone.

i am trusting and believing that this is going to turn around. praying for strength,peace,comfort and healing for my family. praying my daughter goes to rehab. hoping something else surfaces about this officer. i spoke with a therapist the other day and she said i was right about him having displaced anger towards me, when i said he didnt care about my family it struck a nerve in him.
thank you for your continued support and prayers,
hugs to you all,
debbie
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if he was any kind of lawyer at all, he could get those charges reduced and you should not have any felony charges.  that is ridiculous ! ! !   of course, then he can't charge you that $5,000.00 because you wouldn't be going to superior court.

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I agree with LL.  I would call around.  I have a feeling this cop has some skeletons in his closet that need to come out also.
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Ya know, I really don't want to scare you.  These charges need to be dropped, they are out of line. However, after my last 18months dealing with the justice system, all I can say is:  listen to your lawyer. Truth no longer matters. The longer you cling to the truth setting you free the worse trouble you will find.  I was like you, believed in truth and justice and circumstances making a difference.  I was wrong.  And I was the victim in the original crime.  

Prosecutors do not get bonuses for justice, they get them for convictions.  Charges are not going to be dropped because they are ridiculous,they will be used as leverage to bully you into a plea agreement.

My BF as a result of severe substance abuse committed a terrible act of domestic violence.  It was his first offense in his almost 50 yrs.  They overcharged him w/4 felonies as well as the misdemeanor domestic battery.  They lied to me repeatedly while extracting information.  There was no justice in anything they did.  They held sex offenses over his head to convince him to plead to a lesser felony.  They did not care that he was sober from that moment on.  They did not care about anything but the conviction.  

By all means, you can keep investigating the cop's record.  But, listen to your lawyer at the same time!!  No charges will be dropped if they can use them against you.  If you are lucky, the judge at the preliminary hearing will reduce or throw them out but at this point you are stuck in the system.

Please take care of yourself.  PM me if you have any questions.  And if your daughter is not motivated sufficiently after all this to go into long term rehab you are going to have to let go, at least for now.

My heart goes out to you.

~~ dgg
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Just want to mention you can ask for a court-appointed attorney for free.  Some of them are great attorneys.  I have worked in the courtroom for many, many years (and have been on the other side because of my ex-husband and his addictions,) and I really believe the charges will be dropped.  I know this is unfair and wrong but the legal system doesn't work the way we think/want it to be.  Many things are unfair about it.  I'm glad you took pictures of your injuries and did see a doctor.  I was going to suggest an Urgent Care or something that doesn't cost as much.  I hope this situation ends for you soon.  Prayers for you and your family.
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How are you doing Debbie?  I'm thinking about and praying for you .  Hugs.
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Today was my first appearance. I have to appear in superior court,because they are felony charges they can't be reduced  at the municipal level. They go up and if reduced come back to municipal.  I went in to talk to the prosecutor, I thought he was in the room by himself. Nope there were 10 cops in there. He asked me what happened I started to explain about the keys, he said where is pharo (the cop) another one called him.prosecutor  talked to him on the phone and he cut me right off and said you have to go to superior court that's it. He didn't want to hear another word I said. How can the prosecutor be fair when he cohorts with the cops?
I need to speak with a couple more lawyers. This is going to be a very long,expensive ordeal. This is causing so much more stress on me. My daughter was kicked out 11 days ago, still hasn't asked how I am. She is so hurtful. She was supposed to start school and a new jobm.no such luck,has been telling me she called about inpatient not sure I believe her. She hasn't been answering mine or my husbands calls or text.
Thank you all for your continued support,prayers and concern,
Debbie
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The charges should be dropped, if the D.A. persues this case it would be quite possibly the biggest miscarriage of justice I've heard of in quite some time. You need to go into court looking as frail and demure as you possibly can. If after the first hearing the D.A. doesn't drop the case I would be surprised. Good luck!
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God can take situations like this and bring something positive out of it.  I am sending those kinds of prayers to you right now.  Please remember you got God on your side. You will get through this.
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sending you strength and support Debbie.. This is all so unbelievable.. I will look forward to finding out what happens today I hope the prosecutor makes a Fool out of himself !! I still can not speak of your daughter right now as I have not a lot of nice thoughts on how this went down and how she is treating you and the situation. I have 5 sisters my first thought is to pop her one for you !! anyway I can only with for your forgiveness and patience.. You are a incredible lady Do not forget that !! warm hugs
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Apparently some people don't understand addiction. It is a disease and by all and any means does not make an excuse for any of our actions as addicts. Not even close. Although what family's of this disease should be doing is seeking some help as well. It is absolutely impossible for anyone to understand this awful disease when they are simply not educated. I am very sorry for what he is doing to your family but please donor give up on him. He is sick and I have been through some very similar problems with my family as most addicts have. I do believe that it is the family's and loved ones who are the victims Bc you guys have To go  through this when it is simply not a mistake that you guys made it is ours. Although there are many of us that do accept responsibility for our actions but unfortunately there are some that do not. Has any inpatient treatment been done?
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